My Poor daughter!

gilly41

Hi
Sorry its not really a debt free post but I always post on this board!!
My daughter has started her finals today ---she is doing a Maths Degree. She is really very clever but goes to pieces when it comes to the exams.
The first year she got a first and last year she was ill

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she was able to take them again(think i have got it right) and ended up with another first.I have just had her in tears saying that todays exam has gone really badly and that she never got to sleep til 6 this morning!!! She has another exam in the morning at 9.
The point is she strives so hard and has been offered a funded place on a Masters at a Uni near London is she gets a first. I told her not to put herself under such pressure but she doesnt listen to me. I have tried to explain that getting a maths degree---regardless of what grades----is fantastic but she doesnt see it that way!!!The funded place is for 12K a year but I have said that there are plenty of other opportunities if she doesnt get in!!!
Sorry to waffle on!!!She just seemed so upset!!!

nicola1982_2

It's so difficult when it comes to exam time. My university has just cancelled a ton of exams (AUT strike), leaving a lot of students worrying about where their credits will come from. University can be so difficult and I really feel for your daughter.

Imelda

Hi gilly,

I was exactly the same when I did my finals, I really needed a 2:1, but since I had changed university half way through (long story) I had to pass certain units in my final year or I wouldn't get a degree at all. The only practical advice I can give you is, has she tried Bach rescue remedy (from Holland and Barrett http://www.hollandandbarrett.com/pages/searchRes.asp?xs=2081AB03588748FDA57A63641E0F9865&searchtext=rescue+remedy&x=9&y=8 )? It helped me just to relax before the exams (she's obviously highly intelligent, so i guess it's just nerves rather than lack of preparation) and I added some to a bottle of water that I took into the exam room. I would tell her not to worry about the funded place (the likelihood is they would give her the place with a 2:1 anyway), cross that bridge if/when she comes to it. Also as she has done so well in her first two years, one exam won't be a disaster (I don't know how her course is marked but most I know take a certain percentage of marks from each year and you are usually able to fail one module).

Wish her luck from us all and let us know how she gets on!

kar

Mine start on Monday. I know how she feels. I'm going to be soooooo close to the 1st/2.1 borderline i just hope i can get a few extra marks to push it up.

Wish her luck

Imelda

Good luck kar! I do not envy anyone taking their finals right now.

Nicola 1982, what are your university doing about your exams? surely they can't let you graduate without taking the exam

gilly41

Hi
Thanks everyone for your kind wishes and good luck to everyone doing exams

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so stressful!!!
She seems to have calmed down now---- apparently(and i dont understand it all!!) todays exam was worth 10 credits and altogether the year is made up of 120 credits!!! She seems to think she has maybe got 50% today!!!!
Take care everyone

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and again good luck
xx

lynzpower

Incidentally, everyone that I knew who asked for a remark went up a grade that was a good few years ago, but if she gets a 2:1, get it remarked judt in case.

Wish her luck
Lynz

tesuhoha

I've got a little story here that might put her troubles into perspective. I work at a school as a teaching assistant and i am attached to a year 11 class. There's a boy in there who has never been a good attender. Apparently when he was small his sister was in hospital a lot and he had to go with his mum to the hospital as she was not able to pick him up from school. Although quite a bright boy he became special needs school action plus because of his poor attendance. Anyway I have known him since he was 11 and earlier this year he came back after a prolonged absence and showed me a note from his mother. It said that his father had walked out on the family very suddenly and he was absolutely devastated. Well, with a lot of support and kindness from staff and other boys in the class we got him through it. Anyway with their GCSE's coming up in the next few weeks, last week I helped him as well as other members of the class to sort out his exam timetable so he knew exactly what he was doing. He was most anxious that it was correct and I felt pleased that he was so determined to do well. Then yesterday they had their ICT exam and in class later on that day I and the ICT teacher discussed whether anyone had missed it and we noticed that there was only one, and it was the boy I've just been talking about. So I said to the teacher that it was strange because he was good at ICT and he had been really determined to do the exams. So she went to see if she could find anything out and when she came back she handed me a slip and said 'this explains it.' On the slip it said that the boy had missed his exam because his sister had died and it was unlikely that he would be taking any of his GCSEs. So I feel really gutted for him. Not only has the poor lad lost his sister which would be dreadful at any time but it has happened just before his exams. So that boy will go through life without any qualifications and he will always struggle to find work. I know him and I know what hes like; he wont try to do those exams at a later date. So when you think about someone like this, then your daughter is in an extremely fortunate position. I dont mean to belittle her problems but in the scheme of things she has nothing to be upset about really. Sorry, I just felt I had to tell someone as i feel really sad about it.

In_Search_Of_Me

Oh dear that is sad but you never know he MIGHT do something later! I left school with 3 olevels, labelled as thick (wasnt - am dyslexic) & discovered that I love learning at the age of 23...10 years, 1 degree, 1 masters & 2 professional qualifications later....never too late! As to the original question/worry I am sure that you listeing & making soothing noises really helps so just keep it up. I am DIRE at exams (mind blank, feel sick, dont sleep, sweat & just loose it!) but if she is doing a modular course (sounds like she is) even if she does badly on exam then her coursework should bring her mark up....let us know how she gets on & send her a hug...its an awful feeling! Also sounds like she is under alot of pressure & am sure that you have reassured her that you love her & are proiud of her no matter what mark she gets?

tesuhoha

By the way, I dont mean to sound unsympathetic. I am sorry for your daughter too. My daughter is also at uni and frets about her exams in exactly the same way and theres nothing I can say to her that makes it any better. In fact she gets annoyed at whatever I say to try to cheer her up. So I wish her the best of luck.