Having a really bad weekend

Sugar

Hi everyone, hope you're all well. Feel like i've had another LBM tonight, ended up going out last night even though i knew i really didn't have the spare money and then as i said before i'm a shopaholic and today while my car was in the garage i ended up going for a wander in town. Bought a few things which i didn't need and definitely couldn't afford!

Feeling really guilty :(

tiny_courageous

You can't take back the night out, but can you take the things you bought but didn't need and get a refund?

Don't beat yourself up over what's done.

crawley_girl

I agree. What's the point in beating yourself up. We are lapse. Last time I did, I disappeared from the forums. But am back now!

Do what tiny says and take the stuff back tomorrow and get a refund, no harm done there!

Sugar

Thanks guys, i just feel like i've only just started and can't do it so how will i do it long term. Mad at myself!

Definitely feel better for venting though, and your words of encouragement also help

mummy2mygirls

i also agree - dont beat your self up to much. You know you shouldnt have but sometimes we slip up. now its back to dealing with all the debt
Take anything you can back and just get back to trying to pay things of.

yellowduck_2

Hey sounds like you have done really well just by knowing you shouldn't have done it.......it's a lapse not a relapse. None of us are going to be perfect all the time and we learn as we go along. Take the stuff back if you can. Have a think about other ways to make yourself feel good other than shopping. Try to stay out of the shops that tempt you, maybe if you can't see it, you won't want to buy it. Take care and don't despair!

Little_Miss_Uni-Debt

Hey! Well done on noticing you shouldn't really have spent the money. I suppose feeling guilty shows you are changing your attitudes towards spending.

I know there was a time where I would have gone out or gone shopping and not thought twice how much I spent but feeling slightly guilty helps you to make conscious decisions next time regarding how much you spend.

I also think the two slight 'over spends' maybe slightly linked. I always feel that once I spend some money it is far easier to part with more money for a second purchase or a third or maybe even a fourth!

Maybe also spending time with friends on a night out triggers your impulse to go out and buy some bits and pieces almost getting back to your pre-LBM and MSE days. It is natural to want to do a bit of shopping every now and again!

However noticing these habits are a good start! The odd slip up is normal, recognising them and stopping them continuing into your old ways is excellent!!:T

bluebag

Well done for thinking about where you missed the path, don't beat yourself up about it. Just get back on it and you'll be OK.
bb.

KittyBoo_2

Been there myself and guilt is horrid.
At least you can recognise it as a bit of a weakness when you are near the shops.
I went through a really bad phase of buying stuff but tried to turn it into a positive.
I would buy it, take it home and try it on and then put it back in the bag and take it back for a refund after a couple of days.
Take the stuff back and don't be too hard on yourself.

Shoe_Gal

My advice woyld be to make sure your budget is not too strict. I have had several lapses through being too 'all or nothing' and going on mad sprees Make sure you have some 'fun' money on your budget, if you are in it for the long haul you need to be able to have a life too

GeorgeUK

You just need to break the habit sugar. That's not an easy thing to do overnight.

It might be worth trying to set up a reward system so that you can deal with the debt and still give yourself a treat from time to time. A week without buying anything new and you're allowed a treat, then try to extend that period so that you aren't taken by sudden impulses to spend.

It's not the end of the world and you know you've made a mistake. The next step is managing to deal with that before the actual purchase is made.