Help please

cognitiveghost

This is a long story - but I'll try to keep it short. I've posted on the credit card forum about transferring of balances, they suggested I post my SOA here. My husband has just revealed around 27k of debts which I didn't know about. He has been suffering from mental health problems and has been suicidal, and is seeing a psychiatrist shortly. I suspect it might be bipolar, or something related to the spending problems. He has also done something silly that I don't really want to go into here (it's not terrible terrible and doesn't involve harming anyone else or fraud), but there is a possibility of a jail sentence...although nothing is sure yet. Part of the spending was the fact that he was self medicating off the internet.

Anyway I'm beside myself worrying about him, and the most important thing is his health. However the money thing is worrying me too. Especially if the jail thing happens - I have no idea how I'd cope. I was asking the credit card board if I could transfer his cc debt onto my cards at a 0% rate balance. I need to help out however I can. We have no children, and earn about 60k between us, so fairly good salaries. Although live in south east so life is expensive! We have a mortgage (only for about 18 months though). I'd be happy to get a loan out in my name and pay it off that way, though don't know if that's advisable. I have all his cards and they are cut up, and he has promised not to get into more debt. I think all that has happened has shocked him so much he won't. I've posted the SOA below, although the interest rates are estimated as I haven't got all his statements yet. As you can see we're not massive spenders - spend too much on food I'd say though.

Any advice would be good - I'm going to call the National Debtline tomorrow too.

Thank you...

Statement of Affairs and Personal Balance Sheet

Household Information
Number of adults in household........... 2
Number of children in household......... 0
Number of cars owned.................... [1]

Monthly Income Details[/b]
Monthly income after tax................ 2000
Partners monthly income after tax....... 1900
Benefits................................ 0
Other income............................ 0
Total monthly income.................... 3900

Monthly Expense Details
Mortgage................................ 830
Secured/HP loan repayments.............. 0
Rent.................................... 0
Management charge (leasehold property).. 0
Council tax............................. 143
Electricity............................. 50
Gas..................................... 0
Oil..................................... 0
Water rates............................. 35
Telephone (land line)................... 10
Mobile phone............................ 40
TV Licence.............................. 12
Satellite/Cable TV...................... 0
Internet Services....................... 14.67
Groceries etc. ......................... 300
Clothing................................ 50
Petrol/diesel........................... 250
Road tax................................ 15
Car Insurance........................... 30
Car maintenance (including MOT)......... 0
Car parking............................. 0
Other travel............................ 0
Childcare/nursery....................... 0
Other child related expenses............ 0
Medical (prescriptions, dentist etc).... 40
Pet insurance/vet bills................. 12
Buildings insurance..................... 20
Contents insurance...................... 20
Life assurance ......................... 15
Other insurance......................... 0
Presents (birthday, christmas etc)...... 0
Haircuts................................ 0
Entertainment........................... 100
Holiday................................. 0
Emergency fund.......................... 0
Total monthly expenses.................. 1986.67


Assets
Cash.................................... 0
House value (Gross)..................... 0
Shares and bonds........................ 0
Car(s).................................. 0
Other assets............................ 0
Total Assets............................ 0


Secured & HP Debts
Description....................Debt......Monthly...APR
Mortgage...................... 200000...(830)......0
Total secured & HP debts...... 200000....-.........-

Unsecured Debts
Description....................Debt......Monthly...APR
Credit cards...................23000.....0.........15
Loans..........................7000......0.........15
Total unsecured debts..........30000.....0.........-


Monthly Budget Summary
Total monthly income.................... 3,900
Expenses (including HP & secured debts). 1,986.67
Available for debt repayments........... 1,913.33
Monthly UNsecured debt repayments....... 0
Amount left after debt repayments....... 1,913.33

Personal Balance Sheet Summary
Total assets (things you own)........... 0
Total HP & Secured debt................. -200,000
Total Unsecured debt.................... -30,000
Net Assets.............................. -230,000

tallyhoh

The thing that jumps out at me is your groceries, I only spend about £200 a month for 4 adults, 2 dogs & a bird, sometimes its less. We eat really well. £100 a month entertainment is a lot when you owe so much, what does it consist of, can you do alternative things for free?
I sympathise with your husbands illness, My OH has problems which I now understand to be Narcisstic personality disorder. Cant stop him spending because he really believes he's entitled to stuff, I just try & keep some sort of control on it.

Good Luck

cognitiveghost

Thanks - the entertainment will definitely be going now - DVDs and books from the library me thinks.

How do you do it re the groceries - we're not great cooks so tend to buy those Tesco meals that you just put in the oven. I guess it's all about cooking from scratch then - here's to learning I guess.

Sorry to hear about your OH - it's very hard isn't it....

Teenie_D

Hi sorry to hear about your problems.

Regarding your grocery shopping how about doing what we now do? We take out about £200 on pay day (this is for 2 adults and 1 toddler still in nappies) and that has to do us the rest of the month.

We make out menus and buy what we need. You dont have to be a great cook to eat well and healthily and I promise you once you start cooking from scratch you will very rarely buy ready meals again!

Make batches on your days off and freeze them, then you dont have to cook every day, I work alternate days so am able to cook on my day off and make enough to do us the following day when i'm working. Also check out the O/S board they often have fab ideas.

Good luck and if you need any recipe quick recipe ideas give me a shout.

Also your petrol is also quite high-anywhere you can cut down here?

Teenie x

tallyhoh

Use the menu on the right & scroll down to Old style money saving, brilliant! Do you menu plan? you need to start. Start taking your lunch to work if you dont already.
The OS forum will give you loads of ideas, like this thread:

http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.html?t=1129333

debtaghh

Try and get groceries down, look through your last receipt and check if you really needed it.

Your medical seems quite high, if this is for prescriptions can't you get a preprescription-it costs about £104 per year and you can get as many prescriptions as you need for that one person.

Good luck, hope it all goes ok for you.

GeorgeUK

From what you have posted above, you may be able to clear all your debts within 2 years if you stick to your current budget and have 2 wages coming in. With one wage (hope it won't come to that), you will have a reduction in income but also food and possibly petrol. The council tax may even increase a little.

I don't think you should take on any of your husbands debt into your own name - you can make payments towards it if you can afford it, but don't put it in your own name until you find out what's happening.

It would help if you could tell us the APR's for the individual debts and we may be able to advise on the best way to tackle them.

£50 pm on clothing may need to be reduced a little too along with the food budget. It might be worth keeping a spending diary so that you know exactly where your money is going so that you are better prepared with any budgeting that is required.

cognitiveghost

Menu plan - never done that in my life! Have also always been terrified of freezing stuff as don't know what to freeze and if it's OK to reheat stuff. Will have a look now at the OS board and print off some recipes - this is a great new project for me to get stuck into and stop thinking about our problems - plus it's money saving! (and good for the environment, the amount of food we throw away is silly).

No joy with petrol - we both live far away from work. But what I should do is make sure I choose the lowest pump price.

Poosmate

Hello and welcome to the DFW board. Congratulations on taking what is a really hard step in writing everything down and sharing it, but believe me, you will get so much support here although you may feel initially that people are pulling your financial circumstances apart it's really not like that at all. People post their opinions on here to try to help. I hope you will feel the support that is within those posts.

Not sure if your council tax is high because my house isn't worth anything like £200k but if you're paying it over 10 months, could you ask your council if you could pay it over 12 instead, it would bring the payments down a little bit each month.

From what other people have posted on here it looks like your water rates might be a bit high too. I've seen the price some others pay and am thinking of going on to a water meter. The rule of thumb is that "if your house has more bedrooms than people a water meter should be cheaper". I don't know where that comes from, just something I heard.

You already know about the groceries, you could probably knock at least £100 off that cost. Try downshifting to the shops own brand - it's the new black you know! Also take a look at the Money Saving Old Style board, they have loads of tips and advice on how to shop on a budget.

Maybe you could stop buying new clothes for a few months and "shop form your wardrobe" as someone else who posts regularly on here puts it. Maybe sell some of your clothes to buy new?

Buildings and contents insurance? Are these from the same provider? You may be able to get cheaper as a bundle? I don't know. If you do change any insurances or utilities use a cashback site like Quidco or Greasypalm. Apparently you get loads of cashback if you go through their sites! Yay!

Entertainment, as again you have already realised, is far too high. Remember that saying "the best things in life are free", there is lots of stuff you and your OH can do to entertain yourselves and it's probably going to be much better quality "you" time spent together which it sounds like he could do with more than anything right now. Do people go for picnic's in the park and to feed the ducks anymore? Wasn't that considered to be quite romantic once upon a time? (I know I don't get out enough! lol)

Oh I wouldn't suggest you take the debts on in your name as you would become responsible for them and if the worst happened and he was imprisoned for a while, would you be able to cope financially as well as emotionally?

You sound like a wonderful person being so supportive of your husband, I hope it all works out for you and soon.

Best wishes and take care

Poo

cognitiveghost

Thanks everyone - this is so helpful. And it's really inspiring seeing some of your signatures, you really work hard to get the debt down and stay so cheerful with it.

And Poo, I completely agree with you - the best things in life are free. We went for a walk by the river today and sat there in the sun, really nice. Although we did have a lime and soda each... £3.10!! Will bring my own next time...