Future In-Laws

JenE_2

Hi all
Hope you can help me here...
We are having our 'do' in quite a small hotel, just 12 rooms there and they have a sister pub about a mile away with 6 rooms.
However, we have at least 21-rooms-worth of people invited (and almost everyone has already informally said they are coming). So I've got to find some other B&Bs locally for 3 couples to stay in.
The problem now comes from my future in-laws (who I get on really well with usually) who are demanding that they stay in the hotel itself. Of all the people invited to the wedding, they live the nearest and I have already organised that my brother (who doesn't drink) will give them a lift home when he takes my parents home. They will also need two rooms as my future uncle-in-law will be staying with them.
We have guests coming from the US, Germany and hundreds of miles within the UK so I think we have to give them priority for accommodation.
H2B is cross with them for "acting like children" in his words, although he'd generally do anything for a quiet life, so isn't quite as annoyed as me! But he's prepared to support me to say no to them if that's what we decide.
I REALLY don't want to fall out about this! But I am cross as it feels like they're trying to dictate to us.
What do you reckon? Am I being unreasonable?
thanks guys

whitewing

No you are not being unreasonable. However, it's quite touching that they want to be part of the excitement. (Don't forget that they'll be seeing relatives etc that they haven't seen for years). Let them have a room in your hotel.

(We had a cottage for our reception, told my dad very specifically that he wouldn't be staying in it overnight & if they were staying they needed to sort out a hotel, and had to chuck him, my mum and my MIL out at midnight. I was so angry but no way was I having them in the living room below us on our wedding night!!!)

Rachyuk3

No you're not being unreasonable, we are having similar problems too! As our reception venue is only 5 mins away from our house we are coming home, we are both quite happy with this & it means they're all sorted!:rotfl:

francinefishpaw

In laws, god love em lol

cleomolly

From what you have said it does make complete sense for them to go home, but I'm reluctant to say they shoulkd as they obviously want ot be a part of the day! We're having the compete opposite problems, we guessed that FIL would be in a suit same as my dad and all other groomsmen, he had other ideas and said 'I'm not wearing a suit, I've got one'. then we assumed they would be coming to the rehersal the week before, when I mensioned it to them MIL said 'no, we're not going, it's for the brides family not us'. If it can be arranged I'd let them stay but if others who are trveling need the rooms then its tough luck and they will have to lump it!

Herbiecat

I understand your worry but don't you think this is all because they want to be part of your day, I know my parents and in-laws would be the same.

They are probably looking forward to all getting together before and after especially if there are people who they haven't seen for ages.

Please don't take offence at this but I think you should understand this is a special time for them as well as you and your OH.

gill_81uk

Can you tell them that you would be happy for them to stay there but you need to find rooms for guests so can they help you find local b & bs? They might not be quite so keen if they have to do the legwork!

Also have you explained to them that your parents aren't staying in the hotel?

Zazen999

Why not ask them to put up other relatives in their house?

miserly_mum

Hi Jen,
it's not up to you to sort everyones accomodation out for them. Yes you can email them a few hotel or b & b names but after that it's up to them to sort it out.

If you accept a wedding invite (I feel) that is not near enough your home to make it possible to either drive or get a taxi home from then you either:

a) decline graciously because it is too much expense/hassle
or
b) accept and get accomodation booked

The Bride and Groom have enough to sort out

JenE_2

gill_81uk wrote: »

Can you tell them that you would be happy for them to stay there but you need to find rooms for guests so can they help you find local b & bs? QUOTE]

That's a great idea! :T
Thanks, will definitely be heading down this road - it'll save me a bit of work too.

Having talked to other friends too I think you guys are right that they really want to be involved, and I probably need to get them more involved with the planning too. I'm a reasonably organised person, so I've pretty much just got on and done it and I think my in-laws are maybe feeling a bit left out, even though my parents haven't done anything either!

Onwards and upwards!