Swinging cats in London flats

penguine

Cat-swingers of the world – unite!
Overcoming British snobbery about housing may mean we finally get the living space we need

Were it not so unkind to the cat, I would like to take one along the next time a London estate agent shows me round a flat. I would carry it with me in a holdall. I would wait while the estate agent picked out the finer points of the dwelling. I would ignore his occasional curious glances at the mewing, shifting bag. Once he had finished, and I'd asked a few questions, I'd say: "Just one more thing."

I would place the bag on the floor, unzip it, reach in and grab the cat firmly, with both hands, by the tail. Lifting the animal out of the bag, I would plant my feet firmly in the centre of the largest room and begin to spin, so the centrifugal force and my outstretched arms would cause the (no doubt protesting) animal to swing, stretched out in the air, through 360 degrees – unless it collided with a wall, in which case, evidently, the flat would be of no use; and nor would the cat, which is why I would never actually do this, and nor, flathunters, should you.

It sometimes seems that people on this island are, among Europeans, afflicted with the double curse of particular credulity towards commercial propaganda – marketing and advertising – and a particularly intense onslaught of that propaganda. If only we would defy the marketeers, I sometimes think, if only we were more cynical about the things they try to sell us, like tiny ugly flats, if only we would insist on what we want, instead of what they choose to give us, the masquerade of choice could be exposed.

www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2009/aug/15/privately-built-housing-to-small

vivatifosi

Interesting summary penguine. I wanted to read more detail after reading this, so here's two links if anyone's interested

http://www.cabe.org.uk/files/Space-in-new-homes-what-residents-think.pdf (CABE summary)

http://www.cabe.org.uk/files/resident-satisfaction-with-space-in-the-home_0.pdf (HATC full survey)

movingforward2010

mmmmmmmmm now i know what those blood stains are on the walls of flats

LydiaJ

An interesting article. Thanks for the link, penguine.

PS Every time I see your username, I wonder how to pronounce it. Should I think of you as "penguin-E" or "pengween"?

chucky

penguine wrote: »

www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2009/aug/15/privately-built-housing-to-small

from the article

Overall, housing in Britain isn't as rabbit hutch-like as it has been portrayed in the past few days (I should say that the rabbit-keeping families I know give their bunnies enviably commodious digs.) European statistics show that out of 18 countries, Britain has the third most living space, on average, at 44 sq m a person. It's beaten only by Sweden (just) and Denmark.

if Britain has the third most living space in Europe this is a good thing or didn't the journalist have anything to write about... :rolleyes:

PasturesNew

44 sq m a person

... I have to work that out in old pennies first... 473 square feet. I have under half that. I have about 225 square feet/20 square metres. That is the total floor area, including the water tank cupboard, loo and built in cupboard.

What counts as living space though? Is it total floorspace, or do you deduct the loo/kitchen/what I wonder?

chucky

PasturesNew wrote: »

... I have to work that out in old pennies first... 473 square feet. I have under half that. I have about 225 square feet/20 square metres. That is the total floor area, including the water tank cupboard, loo and built in cupboard.

What counts as living space though? Is it total floorspace, or do you deduct the loo/kitchen/what I wonder?

it's living space, so will include the bathroom and kitchen...

chewmylegoff

having looked at a lot of london flats, the problem with all of the new ones (be they conversions or new build) is that it is now de rigeur to put the kitchen and the living room in the same room. this is all very well when you are knocking two normal rooms into one big room, but when the "contemporary open plan living space" is the same size as a normal lounge, the end result is a small pokey flat with a sofa that smells of bacon.

PasturesNew

I know of a studio for sale that is a total of 12'x14'. Total. Yes, total. I'll repeat that because it's really small ... but yes, 12'x14' includes the kitchen and the loo/shower.

http://www.rightmove.co.uk/property-for-sale/property-26637278.html
"Measurements include the en-suite shower, kitchen and the front bay window"

I wonder how much it'll go for.

Original sales of the studios/flats there were, but I don't know what number this one is: http://www.houseprices.co.uk/e.php?q=1+trenance+road+tr7

I should bookmark that and see if it comes through on LR at the end of September.

PasturesNew

chewmylegoff wrote: »

the end result is a small pokey flat with a sofa that smells of bacon.

Don't forget you also have to dry your clothes on an airer in this room, so you go to work smelling like a McMuffin.... therefore these properties should be achievable by a single person who has a job at McDonalds.

chucky

PasturesNew wrote: »

Don't forget you also have to dry your clothes on an airer in this room, so you go to work smelling like a McMuffin.... therefore these properties should be achievable by a single person who has a job at McDonalds.

the smallest i'd seen was 20sq metres - that's 16sq metres!!! :rotfl: