What to do? Please help with some advice.

mozzyc

Hi

Well, as many of you know, i'm having constant battles with Lloyds TSB. After being on our dmp with payplan since 2005, owing £40000, and making good progress with most of our debts, we've just received a statement from lloyds, and basically, we owe them about the same as we did in 2005, even after paying 2£02 per month. Overall, we pay payplan £672 per month.
We can't afford to pay anymore, and we've tried over and over again to get them to stop the interest on our loan, but keep getting told no. Yesterday most recently. My husband even said to them "You know yourselves that we can never pay this off like this".

Our dmp was due to finish in 2011, but now this could go on for many more years.
And we are desperate to start a family, re-start our lives. We've tried our absolute hardest, been so low emotionally, had so many bad days and so much sadness with this dmp, realising we're getting nowhere.
I know we messed up getting in debt, and we've tried our very best to set it right, but putting our life on hold is so hard. We had 2011 in our sights, we could start planning a family, now that seems to have slipped a long long way.

Is bankruptcy our only option?

I just need some advice, because emotionally, I just don't feel I can go on like this. So depressed all the time, our lives just standing still.

anh1904

Never been on a DMP, but the whole debt thing is totally consuming when you're in it.
You're addressing it head on though, so you should feel proud of what you have achieved, not beat yourself up about things over which you can exert little if any control.

Jesthar

Relax a little, mozzy,a read back what you just posted:

"making good progress with most of our debts"

See, you are getting somewhere. Maybe not as fast as you'd like, thanks to Lloyds being idiots, but imagine what would have happened had you not started your DMP when you did!

Not much comfort, I know, but hopefully better than nothing...

*hugs*

~Jes

GeorgeUK

Has Payplan or CCCS said anything about this?

I know there was something mentioned about reclaiming the interest, but can't see how this would work. Did you get this in writing or any further explanation to enquire of the process from another organisation?

If things were getting that bad, you might consider removing LTSB from the DMP (due to a change in circumstances) and see how long it takes before they send the debt to a DCA or court. If it goes to court, there is a good chance they wouldn't be allowed to add interest so hopefully that wouldn't be too much of a hardship. I stress that this is what i may consider as a very last resort - get advice from other sources before doing this and be clear on the implications involved in doing this.

Hope something happens for you soon.

mozzyc

Thanks everyone.

I think the hardest thing of all is putting off starting a family.

We're in our mid 30's, and feel like there is now a giant clock ticking above us.
Are we really doing the right thing by putting it off, should we just go for it, or wait for another few years. Its all just so daunting, and I just don't know what to do.
How do people in debt/dmp manage with a new baby when the budget is already so very very tight, and london childminder fee's are so very high.

BeautyandtheBeast_3

no advice but just wanted to ish you luck and give you a virtual hug

mozzyc

Thanks BeautyandtheBeast

dancingfairy

I think someone on here had a creditor being extremely unhelpful (can't remember who it was though or who the debt was with). They basically wrote a very stern letter to the bank saying that everyone else had accepted the DMP - they had been advises by the bank concerned I think to contact CCCS/Payplan etc who had set up /recommended a dmp so now why were they refusing to help.
I believe their situation had gone on for a long while as well.
I think they pointed out how much they had paid and how much the charges were had been added.
I think they also found some oft guides which said that the banks should be reasonable and accept offers from 3rd parties ie cccs/payplan etc.
I think they also said right this is what I want: I want to have all my charges totally x amount in my bank account and I want no further charges added and you to accept my dmp and if I don't get any satisfaction I will complain to the ombudsman as you are being obstructive/unhelpful etc.
Worth a try anwyay
df

RAS

mozzyc

If you were to have a child, what extra benefits would you get? Check out www.entitledto.com.

Are you both absolutely stuck on living in London? Could you consider moving somewhere cheaper?

And do you realise the DMP can be altered if you circumstances change?

Personally I would suggest that you seriously think about those options.

mozzyc

Thanks guys. I really needed to hear some support.

No we're not set in living in London, its just that i work in SW London, and my husband SE London, so moving out, one of us will be paying extra travelling costs. The only reason we moved here (Middlesex), is because before, we were living somewhere cheaper (Dartford), but I was travelling 2 hours into work, and 2 hours home, and paying £200 per month for my travel ticket. Now our rent is more (and place is much smaller), but i'm not paying any travelling costs at all, and we're saving £50 per month.

I will have a look at the benefits. Thanks. I know we both earn above minimum wage, so won't qualify for much, but if i do fall pregnant, then I know I should get child benefit.

I'm going to write an official complaints letter this weekend, and send it with the wording mentioned to the Lloyds complaints department, and see what we can get from there. Otherwise I will send a complaint to the OFT.

I guess I just feel so stressed out because hubby is so eager to start a family, I think he feels like we're just not getting any younger, and after being together for 15 years, we're emotionally ready for it. I'm sure people make it work, so we could too. I've just got to get my head around - how we're going to afford it.

Thanks for the support and guidance everyone.

euronorris

Have you looked at the bromley/orpington/sidcup area.

It's still pretty close to london (you can get fast trains to london from Orpington which only take 20 mins), and whilst it would be more in rent than Dartford, it would certainly be cheaper than London (although not sure how centralised in London you are).

Just an idea. I lived in Greenhithe for a while, so completely understand the cost/time thing. Travelling from there was a nightmare.

Orpington was much, much better! And far more trains, running far more often into London too.