Coping?

larzie30

I just feel really despondent today, always try to be positive and keep optomistic no matter what. Keep saying that this is only money and that no one is going to die. But am so scared about the car and the consolidation loan that I keep getting palpitations. I am sure there are lots of you out there who have been through much worse and coped much better but I just feel panic stricken at the moment.

Any coping strategies out there?

Sorry for the post but just need to get it out there I think.

Angiepange

I understand how you feel, my every waking moment is consumed with debt, BR, house, worry, stress and i seem to have lost sight of what really matters at the end of the day, my kids and DH.

Today i pulled myself away from the computer (well for a while anyway!!), away from the paperwork and concentrated on my daughter today, we cleared her room out (my god what a mess!!) and during our tea breaks just sat and talked about stuff, things she has been trying to talk to me about for a while but ive been so caught up in our situation i hadnt really listened!!

It did us the world of good so maybe if you have close people you can talk too a good natter will help?

I feel scared too about our future, home for our kids,jobs, how we gonna cope but i guess you just take it as it comes and you will get through it.

Thinking of you

Angie x

Bethankim

Hi Larzie,

sorry your not coping so well today. (note to self finish the other guide)
It is quite normal to go through all sorts of emotions. Its a big thing, firstly your coping with a sense of ' I cant believe i let myself get into this mess and i must be a complete failure numpty' - or feelings like that..

plus the fear of the unknown is both normal and common, to feel secure you need a sense of controlling your own destiny, and right now there are unknowns - the uknowns are the worry.No matter how much we may say X or Y might happen, your brain is thinking up scenario Z - again its normal.

so some coping strategies.

first off look at what life looks like right now and try and think what it will look like in a years time, what will you be doing, saying and feeling, try and make it as positive a picture as you can. its really useful way of setting a goal and working towards it.

so in a years time, you might think I will answer the phone without worry, look forward to opening my mail and enjoy the sense of freedom sticking to a debt free way of living can be...oooh look i have £5 in my frivolous spending pot i really fancy that ice cream today..

as for the car and loan - you cant know what the OR will say right now overly fretting will just cause you more worry - if you are as informed as you can be - when you find your self fretting - look at the facts of what you know and make a judgement -if you have done all you can then give yourself permission to accept you can do no more.

I know its easier said than done - but we are here, and yo have taken responsibility and are doing something that is a really good thing.

Beth
x

philnicandamy

Its hard as others have said....eventually it'll improve although at the minute your convincing yourself of the worse...sure I still have bad days & it's been over 2yrs now since my BR but life is good now & i've changed for the better...support here helps a huuuuuuuge ammount as well you'll see me sometimes having a moan about something thats been bothering me & everyone NEVER judges AT ALL

maxmycardagain

larzie30 wrote: »

I just feel really despondent today, always try to be positive and keep optomistic no matter what. Keep saying that this is only money and that no one is going to die. But am so scared about the car and the consolidation loan that I keep getting palpitations. I am sure there are lots of you out there who have been through much worse and coped much better but I just feel panic stricken at the moment.

Any coping strategies out there?

well.....

larzie30

lmao, thanks for the giggle ;-)

JCS1

God grant me the serenity
To accept the things I cannot change;
Courage to change the things I can;
And wisdom to know the difference.

As one of life's natural worriers, I find this poem helps. Problem is putting what it says into practice...............

philnicandamy

maxmycardagain wrote: »

well.....

My my max your lookin well!:D

maxmycardagain

i hope dalip dont mind me putting her picture online...