I'm exhausted

fannyadams

Hi all
this isn't moneysaving, but I really need some help here.
DS#2 (nearly 2) is waking up at 4.30am EVERY MORNING! :eek:
I get up and put him back to bed but over the course of the morning til 6.30am he is put back to bed between 10 and 15 times and I am exhausted. Even if HWTHMBO gets up and puts DS#2 back to bed, I am still awake as I cannot go back to sleep for listening out for the next time DS#2 gets up. I thought about earplus but they make me nervous (I can't hear anything else - we had our car stolen when I last wore earplugs).
He goes to bed at around 6.30 - 7.30pm most nights.
I have tried putting him to bed later (8pm- 9pm) but he STILL woke up at 4.30am!!!
I thought that if I dropped his after lunch nap that might make him sleep longer but he fell asleep at tea time, although I did wake him up and tried to keep him awake for the rest of the afternoon, he was wretched by 5pm and this was more stressy than the 4.30am alarm call.
How can I make him sleep til 6.30am?
I asked his nursery to drop his afternoon nap but they think he'll fall asleep in the car on the way home - I'm not bothered, as it only takes me 15 ins to get home (BEFORE anyone says anything - NO I can't walk the road is TOO BUSY to try to get a toddler and a 6 year old to walk along the edge of a busy road with no pavement)
As you can tell, 4 days of barely any sleep is taking it's toll on my sense of humour.
Can someone suggest something, Please I'm desperate for some sleep.

getcarter

:grouphug:

I've been through this, you get so woolly headed you can't function at all!

What do you do when you settle him back down? Do you make a fuss of him and do you leave him or go straight in when you first hear him?

Have you asked any advice from your HV?

Carter

fannyadams

Hi Carter - glad to know I'm not the only one. The lack of sleep is making it harded for me to go back to work (currently convalescing after surgery - supposed to be getting back to work next week, after 3 weeks off, if DS#2 not cured by then will need to have more time off)
He gets out of his bed, his floor creaks as he walks towards the door, I hear his door open and then he peeps round our door walks up to my side fo the bed and says all bright and chirpy "hello!".
when he gets up the first time I say "it's too early, go back to your bed" and escort him back to his bed and make him climb in it himself.
the second time (approx 10 - 15 mins later) I say "bed now", and escort him back to his bed and half help him back into his bed.
the third time (approx 10-15 mins later) I say nothing but wearily walk him back to his bed and pick him up and put him into his own bed.
the 4th time I just scoop him up say nothing and gently 'lob' him back into his bed.
well you get the picture...
He sometimes waits by his door coz he knows he will be taken back to bed but I wait until he's out of his room before taking him back. floor creaks on landing between our room and theirs (did I mention that he shares with DS#1).
I also had a go at HWTHMBO this morning coz instead of putting him back to bed he cuddled him for 10 mins whilst reading his e-post and then tried put him back to bed.
HV is next to useless as she works part time (has children of her own) and is NEVER there when I call her. Also I am v wary of HVs in general after the previous one misdiagnosed my PND and DS#1's lactose intolerance as 'fussy mother syndrome'.
better go spelling is deteriorating and I'm going back to bed.
thanks for looking.

Rachie_B

sleep deprivation is the pits and def the worst part of parenting IMO
but 4.30 am !!! god that is early

when he wakes make no eye contact ,& dont speak just lead him back to bed and lie him down

he will get used to it sooner or later and realise its not worth waking up for as hes not getting any attention for it

make sure hes got a drink nearby just in case hes waking out of thirst

hope he grows out of this habit !

Rachie_B

sorry cross posted

oh no he sounds wide awake at that time !!!!
you def need to be consistent with the routine of putting him back

hes not gonna want to go back to bed after being cuddled for 10 mins

does he wake up his brother?

fannyadams

Sometimes he wakes DS#1 - then no one gets to go back to sleep as DS#1 will talk (yell) to DS#2.
This morning it wasn't so bad DS#1 still asleep at 6am (back for the 15th time) although DS#1 was v tired after being woken up 4 mornings in a row at 4.30am!
I really thought that if I made it really boring for him he would go back and lie down and maybe even go back to sleep.
I do make a huge fuss of DS#2 if he stays in bed until 6.30am or later, or if he comes in to me after 6.30am we sit on my bed and read books or play games, until it's time to get dressed for nursery.
He does have a big anyway up cup by/in his bed with 'juice' (water) in it.
Although DS#2 is showing interest in potty training now, so what if he's waking coz he needs a wee-wee?
AAAAARGH - I'm in a no win situation.
Yes I am definatley going back to bed now.

FrankieM

I think you're doing all the right things....
Do you think its affected by the clocks changing, I know that can affect my children...
The only other thing I can suggest is to go to bed earlier! Then at least you've had a full nights sleep yourself by the time he comes in...

WeirdoMagnet

I don't have any children, so can't speak from experience, but could he be waking at that time because it's getting light?

Personally, in winter, I can stay asleep longer because it's dark, but come the summer (ie now!) I'm awake at about 5.30. That's it then, once I'm awake, I have to get up! I've always been like that - my Mum says I was a nightmare when I was a baby!

Anyhow, maybe you could get some black-out lining for his curtains? We have some very dark curtains, with dark lining too, and they help me.

Good luck,

Georgie

fannyadams

More info on the bedroom:
it's at the back of the house. there are blackout curtains at the windows.
DS#2's bed is under the window - maybe I should move it coz his cot was kind of in the mddle of the room - although I dunno how as room is only just big enough for 2 single beds a wardrobe and a chest of drawers.
He's been in the 'big boy bed' since 26 March and it's only been this last week he's been getting up at OMG a'clock!
I wondered if it was the clocks going forward/lighrt mornings/birds' shouting starts earlier.
Thanks to all for the encouraging posts.
I am already going to bed most nights at 10pm and go to sleep pretty much straight away (hmm that's 7 hours sleep - well, I admit I usually want 12 hours but actually need 9 hours)
Maybe I could try some early, early nights for me too.

Kantankrus_Mare

Awwww this post has brought back my sons toddlerhood very vividly.

Hes now heading towards the teens lol

Anyhow Im sorry but theres not much advice than what has already been said.

My lad would be like yours.......5.30 every single bloody morning!!

I used to think I was the only person in the world up at that time.......even through the winter.

He wasnt a particularly easy child to cope with through the day either with terrible tantrums.......We even went as far as seeing a child psychologist!!

Turns out we had a VERY bright child and the minute he started school he was a changed boy(behaviour wise at least) Im afraid hes still and always has been an early riser.

The only real advice I can give you is to keep up with the early nights for him.

We tried the putting to bed later but found he was even more grizzly.

At least you have a bit of piece at one end of the day is how I look at it.

Just try and look after yourself and get to bed aerly so you can cope with the early mornings better.

I vividly remember feeling like a zombie and thinking it would go on for ever.

Only other idea is to bribe him? lol Put a stair gate on his room so he cant escape and promise him something nice if he stops in his room till say an alarm rings?

If this works you could gradually lengthen the time till it gets to a reasonable hour.

Good luck x

jellyhead

i had this with my eldest. tried everything i could think of - is he hungry or thirsty, needing a wee, is the heating coming on, are the windows blacked out, is he cold etc. but nothing worked. i can't give advice though because i let him climb into my bed at 4am and he slept there for a few more hours. apparently that's not a good idea. he didn't stop doing it until he was nearly 6 either :eek:

his room is in the back and the back gets birds singing and all the joys of the morning many hours before it happens out front. maybe that was it. if so then double glazing would have helped, i'll have to sort that out now that the baby has that back room.