Working mums- does all your income go on childcare?

mrsbez_2

Scotsbob - wow, such an elightening comment. I take it you have been totally independent of any state help since the day you were born, thats amazing.

mrsbez_2

Thanks carolan and lynzpower. lol!

I just get child tax credits at the moment, like every other working family with kids in the UK.

Yes, part of me would really like to go back to work and i think DS would love going to nursery. He will need it when he hasn't got his sister around to play with! My hubby works so many hours aswell, i will feel guilty it he has to cook them dinner when he gets home from work!

I will get help with childcare, but what they give you in one hand gets taken away in the other.

scotsbob

carolan78 wrote: »

Not really helpful, her husband is self employed where does it say she gets benifits Get off your high horse you pompous twit!

Opinions were invited and I offered mine in a polite manner.

You see the box to the side of the page that has "even if you disagree courtesy helps?" Well it applies to you.

Name calling because you disagree is not what one generally finds on these forums.

scotsbob

mrsbez wrote: »

Scotsbob - wow, such an elightening comment. I take it you have been totally independent of any state help since the day you were born, thats amazing.

I would refer you to Oscar Wilde's famous comment.

lynzpower

mrsbez wrote: »

Thanks carolan and lynzpower. lol!

I just get child tax credits at the moment, like every other working family with kids in the UK.

Yes, part of me would really like to go back to work and i think DS would love going to nursery. He will need it when he hasn't got his sister around to play with! My hubby works so many hours aswell, i will feel guilty it he has to cook them dinner when he gets home from work!

I will get help with childcare, but what they give you in one hand gets taken away in the other.

There are ways around this, you can batch cook a load of meals so that they simply need to be reheated, Im sure your hubby can manage that without too mcuh grief, including pasta sauces, stews, spag bol, lasagnes, tagines etc.Dont let this cooking thing put you off! It s a lot easier to batch cook than not!

I certainly expect to stay home when we start a family, It is fundamental to me, my values. I think it is purely a failiue of governments that theyve allowed living costs to spiral out of control that both parents "need" to work, even at the clear detriment to family wellbeing.I wouldhowever be interested in working from home ( eg something like Arise home working) or something more specialist tha draws on my skills from home. I have seen down at storage units many mums using big yellow for parcel distribution, they will drive round deliverring parcels with the LO in the back.Nothing wrong with that! Also evening/ twilights/ nights is an option depending on the hours your OH does.

Mand_x_

QUOTE=mrsbez;23602029]Thanks carolan and lynzpower. lol!

I just get child tax credits at the moment, like every other working family with kids in the UK.

Yes, part of me would really like to go back to work and i think DS would love going to nursery. He will need it when he hasn't got his sister around to play with! My hubby works so many hours aswell, i will feel guilty it he has to cook them dinner when he gets home from work!

I will get help with childcare, but what they give you in one hand gets taken away in the other.[/QUOTE]


My husband and i both work as I deceided to go and get a mortgase when I was 18 lol. However, we both only have standard jobs which means we both have to work in order to pay the bills. Now my boys are both at school, I really regret working while they were so young because I missed out on so much. Children are young for such a short amount of time and it is that time you can NEVER get back.

If there is anyway you can manage finacially until your little one is at school also, then MY opinion is that you spend the quality time with your little one and count yourself very lucky to have this option.

I was really lucky that my sister was a registered childminder, I of course paid her but it meant I had the great relief that someone who also cared deeply for my children was looking after them which took a little of the pressure off.

Even now they are at school and I now only work part time (during school hours) I still struggle to do over time because the after school club at the school charge £3.75 p.f. per child. So it would cost me £7.50 p.h for them to be in club. After the tax man has also taken his cut of my wages it means that I work for an extra £1 ish an hour and I dont get to spend any time with my boys after school. I get to feed them and put them to bed.
I have missed too much time already as they were younger. And thanks to this website I have been able to stay afloat just about, buy following all of the tips etc and can drop my boys off at school and pick them up again.

There are ways to cut back and be really stringent with your finances, top this with earning extra bits of money for surveys and saving money on items on the once it gone its gone thread and then selling them on ebay, I would say I have been able to subsidise my pay by an average of £75 to £100 a month. Some time much more. I know right now my boys would probably prefer a new PS3 game or a new bike instead or have a cupboard with an unlimited amount of chocolates and crisp instead of having me around moaning at them to behaive lol, but in the long run I will never make the mistake of thinking that money was more important than time with my boys, they are the precious ones not my possessions. And I believe as they get older they will see this too and realise that mommy was there for them when they came home every day.

It is also an investment in their future as I get time to sit after school with them every day and help with their home work and even give them some if they have none (luckily they love this I do not pressure them lol) and it has worked out really well, they have are both doing really well at school and are ahead in all of their subjects, my youngest has even been put on the gifted and talented register for his math's (sorry to boast but it is a parents perogative lol) so hopefully they will end up with a career and not just a job like my husband and I both do.

So I guess what I am trying to say is, if you deceide to stay at home dont see this as a negative thing, it can be a possitive thing and as far as earning bits of extra cash all I can say is use this website it is amazing and has helped me so much. You do have to invest a little bit of time but there are ways in which you can earn extra money without having to subsitute your childrens up bringing by someone else.

Mand x

lynzpower

It is also an investment in their future as I get time to sit after school with them every day and help with their home work and even give them some if they have none (luckily they love this I do not pressure them lol) and it has worked out really well, they have are both doing really well at school and are ahead in all of their subjects, my youngest has even been put on the gifted and talented register for his math's (sorry to boast but it is a parents perogative lol) so hopefully they will end up with a career and not just a job like my husband and I both do.

this is the point I was hinting at. Again not to boast, but my mum stayed at home to raise us till we were school age, then she worked part time, then ran own business with dad. By the time I went to school I wasalso suggested to be G&T I was reading enid blytons ( eg secret 7) by the time i was in reception. I could add take away and write already.
25 years ago it was much more normal that this would happen.

Whenever they talk on TV about children leaving primary school without being able to read, I happen to think this is less to do with eduation in schools being poorer and more to do with having more parents having muchless time thanthey did.

lozza1985

I don't have much helpful to add really - I don't have kids yet! - but I think staying at home to look after them is most definately a job in itself lol, my sister stays at home to look after her 2 boys, as her Husband works long hours and she isn't that near to family - so again like you if she worked, she wouldn't be any better off as she's just be spending her wages on a childminder. Maybe try and find something that you could fit in around your kids, like avon, virgin vie, body shop at home etc etc, or start doing the online surveys - the surveys won't earn you very much, but you can get vouchers with a lot of the companies so you could use them for Christmas presents. Every little helps as they say! x

lola34

I was luckly with DS1 I worked in a nursery so he came with me on reduced fees £1 per hour at one point!!!! By the time DS2 came along I then changed jobs to a better wage and along also came tax credits to help, so they were absorbed, I then moved hime to a childminder as this was a bit cheaper - at the end of the day its up to you, is it worth the extra money but do you want to work or stay at home? some people stay at home and others would go crazy- its a personal preference

lola34

lynzpower wrote: »

this is the point I was hinting at. Again not to boast, but my mum stayed at home to raise us till we were school age, then she worked part time, then ran own business with dad. By the time I went to school I wasalso suggested to be G&T I was reading enid blytons ( eg secret 7) by the time i was in reception. I could add take away and write already.
25 years ago it was much more normal that this would happen.

Whenever they talk on TV about children leaving primary school without being able to read, I happen to think this is less to do with eduation in schools being poorer and more to do with having more parents having muchless time thanthey did.

But all children are different and just because a parent stays at home isn't neccessarily going to make their child more intelligent- its the old nature/ nurture debate