*Daily Chat Thread 23rd July 2009**

ZTD

Snaggles wrote: »

ARRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

I don't understand men at all. I am completely confused and more than a little hurt.

We had quite an honest talk about what is going on with our relationship. He said he panicked a bit when he realised I liked him because he doesn't feel likeable? (something like that - words to that effect)

He also said he felt sorry that he hadn't made time to see me.

He said he isn't messing me about or leading me on. He wants to get to know me....BUT....as a friend, which means not sleeping together, at least to start with, because the physical side should be a conscious decision that we are moving the relationship onto a different footing. He said 'not that I don't enjoy it, I do - lots'.

Isn't that pretty much the same thing as dumping me and saying he just wants to be friends?? With maybe a hint that we could be more further down the line. And does this remind you of anyone else, someone...oh....say....a bit green and ogre-like???

I can't work out how I feel about this at all, but I'm upset for reasons I'm not very clear about.

It could mean that in his previous relationship they went too far/too fast and he was ripped apart.

Let me guess, she dumped him, he felt used, and so is resorting to "not repeating the very last mistake in the traditional way of making new mistakes..."

chick-chick

Haven't you already slept together though snags? Very confusing

Lenza_Quidditch

well done on the diy Maz!

Snaggles - sorry you're upset - maybe he's scared things are moving at a pace he doesn't feel in control of and just needs to 'catch up with himself'?

(Land_of)_Maz

snags - the start of a relationship should be effortless and if it's this stressy now, maybe he's not worth it... the grief is supposed to come later (if at all) when you get the payback of a longterm relationship....

cut your losses now babes... be friends if you like but tell the maybe later clause is a no brainer cause you've already been there so it doesn't work to reverse....

(Land_of)_Maz

mind you, who am i to give out relationship advice!!???

Snaggles

I think you are probably all absolutely right and in some ways it's nice that he wants to get to know me properly, and slowly, but I can't help feeling rejected because yes, we have already been sleeping together, and it was bloody fantastic, which he has acknowledged too.

I can see it could be a good thing, if he is thinking he does want a relationship with me. I just wish that maybe he hadn't slept with me first, lots of times, before deciding that.



And if we are just friends for now, do I wait and hope he wants more at some point, or does that mean we are both free to date other people in the meantime?

(Land_of)_Maz

date other people hun...and tell me where you're finding them all....!

Snaggles

(Land_of)_Maz wrote: »

date other people hun...and tell me where you're finding them all....!

:rotfl: If I'd found them all the same way, or in the same place, I would just be avoiding that place by now!

Lenza_Quidditch

hmm, well you don't sound happy after your talk with him - sounds like you don't want the same things right now so I think I'd do what Maz says - stay friends if you want but move on...but only you know him...I've always gone with my gut feeling "Any doubt, sling 'im out"

chick-chick

If he wanted to do things 'properly' that's very honourable, but I think he should have done that right from the start, instead of moving the goal posts now. I'm not in the best of moods though, so maybe I'm being too harsh.