Debt is spiraling out of control

moneymakestheworldgoround

Hi

My only advice would be to seriously consider the going back to work thing. Not easy when you have PND - I know I couldnt make any decisions that lasted more than a day when I had it !

But in your first post, you say you dont think you can afford to go back due to childcare costs etc.. and then when asked about the 2 cars, you say you are planning on going back to work in Sept.

If you don't go back, you could save on the car and petrol and insurance etc... Can you work out what you would save each month by not working? By the same token, can you estimate your proposed salary if you did return to work, and then estimated childcare costs ( government pay 75%) and the cost of petrol, ins, possibly student loan payments depending on earnings etc..

Without knowing the type of salary you earn, I don't know which way these figures will sway.

I know it is important to get some me time and feel like you are contributing, so if you decide to not go back full time, you could get a childminder within walking distance for 2 mornings a week for some you time. You could consider work at home jobs - setting up on your own with a hobby, or party planning using hubbys car in evenings and sharing childcare ( eg jewellery, bodyshop, avon, etc..) or you could do text chat operator/adult phone lines, Arise, etc......

I hope this makes sense !

moneymakestheworldgoround

Or tutoring if you are educated, or running a few classes as fitness instructor, or drama, dancing, workshops making things....

Anything to do with your hobbies !

SingleSue

As someone else has said, would it be possible for you to secure evening work (or the time when your OH is home) thus saving the childcare costs.

This is what myself and my now ex hubby did to maximise the income, he would leave for work at 7.30ish in the morning and return at 5.40, I would leave for work at 6pm and work until 10.30pm ish (office job in my pre children line of work). This solution was particularly helpful when my two youngest were small as it meant I was around during the day for playgroup runs (for middle one) and baby checks for youngest...as they got older, I could take on more daytime shifts (ad hoc basis due to their problems and school holidays) on top of my evening shifts to bring in even more.

Yes it was hard work and it did feel at times that we were like ships passing in the night but it made weekends and time away more special and more importantly, it eventually improved our lives from robbing Peter to pay Paul (and eating reduced foods only) to being able to afford holidays at Disneyland, pay outright for a car, meals out and luxury items at home.

All went belly up when he left me for another woman though!

For cutting energy bills, in the winter we have quilts permanently living on our sofas, nice warm socks and extra blankets on the beds, use the energy saving lightbulbs and turn them off when we leave a room and even some nights, have a spooky fun night (it's possible for me as my children are older) and use our wind up lamp and candles...where they try to scare their poor old mum (and usually succeed!).

I also had PND (x 3) and it's not nice, I remember very well the feeling of hopelessness, the lack of control on my life and the complete fear of trying to sort things out/talking to people. We had our house repossessed in the midst of my first bout of it and it was absolutely horrible so you have my sympathies there. To cut down costs due to your need to have support, do any of your family have access to a PC and msn? If so, you can make free calls via a headset or webcam (most have microphones, you don't need to activate the picture part of the webcam) via msn....you can talk for hours at no charge at all (I do this every night with a friend who lives 200 miles away) and in the process cut down on mobile/landline bills.

Sorry, I am in waffle mode now..must be the late hour!

gfplux

great to hear you are feeling a little better SAVINGCAS.
We have heard it so often on this board that putting the problems down on paper and trying to do something about it makes you feel better.

Why not call SKY, tell them you can not afford the package you have, you may get them to change your deal. A number of people on these boards have reported success with this.

You have to cut the luxury's NOW otherwise you will even loose the basic things.

Good Luck, let us know of any of your successes.

nomorehandbags

Hi Caz - well done for posting - as others have said you have done first thing by writing it all down yes its scary but when it is infront of you i think its easier to deal with. I only joined last week and feel better already - yes i've been stupid in the past with money but am dealing with it.

Could you get a job in a call centre or somewhere in the evening - i know its probably not your dream job but would save you a hell of a lot paying out for 2 cars, whn you may be able to manage with one.

I hope you have seen your doctor about your PND. I suffered from anxiety and depression when my husband left me and everything just seemed to be worse than it was......yes i have debts but i'm dealing with them - saving all my spare change and keeping a spending diary is first step!