She shall shop no more!

KatieShopstoomuch

*UPDATE* Managed to get one of my catalogue companies i owe to agree to a new smaller payment each month so that gives me a bit of ease! Just waiting on two others replying so fingers crossed! I'm rocking and rolling with student finance to try and get my bursary sorted for September and i've also almost cleared the smaller of the two personal loans.



Guess whos back?! I had a small diary on here before but i didn't keep up with it and i think that may be why i am back here again maybe if i'd it going i'd have been able to refer to it anytime i was tempted to get more debt!

No lectures please i've already given myself a few emotional black eyes today Maybe had my 'lightbulb' moment. I had debt before and it was an awful feeling after a lot of tips on MSE, money making, saving etc and with family help i cleared the debts. That was me totally debt free! What did i go and do again, within 6 months i've ran up a shocking amount of debt again, did the usual drill and ignored how serious it really was now i cannot even meet minimum payments and i'm up to my eyeballs again!!! :mad:

I won't post SOA just yet if that is ok, it's too shocking to be honest although i am seeing a debt counsellor tomorrow to write to the companies to offer smaller payments for the time being. I was going to do this myself but have been told it is better to go to CAB?

I know i was so stupid getting debt AGAIN when i know how insane it drove me before and how dull it made my life but i just seem to keep doing it! So that's what i tried to sit and understand and as crazy as it may seem i really feel i have a spending addiction. If i have money i spend it, i thought there are so many things i've bought that i didn't need and it's simply because the cash was there in my pocket even though i knew i had bills to pay. :eek:And most of my debt i have nothing to show for it at all, it isn't as if i got a new sofa or cooker or designer clothes etc there is hardly anything i can see and think 'i spent it on that'. So anyway that is the conclusion i have come to i am a spending/shopping addict, for real! And i think of course i must tackle my debt but i feel the spending thing is also something i really need to tackle and deal with and learn to control otherwise i'll get rid of this debt and just get more. I'm going to try and plan everything i am buying, and make it ONLY what i need then only lift the cash that i need for it so i won't have any money on me to spend on rubbish. I'm also thinking of demolishing my debit card and just keeping my silly dual card so that i'm not tempted to whip that out in a shop, or is that just crazy?

I just feel this is something i have got to learn to control now! I'm starting a course i've worked so hard for the last few years to take me into a career i really want to do with a quite nice salary but theres no point in working so hard towards it and for a better life if i cannot learn to handle my money and spending. So that is my mission!

Follow if you likey if not it's fine i always talk to myself i'm one of those crazy ones Off to bed for me now i feel a little better about admitting my problem in a sense and i'm going to get as much done as i can tomorrow!

Horace

Hi and welcome

Have you cut up your cards - if you don't have them with you you can't spend. Withdraw a certain amount of money each week and once its gone its gone. Keep a spending diary so you know where your money is going, cook from scratch, take packed lunches to work.

See if you can up your income from paid surveys etc (I was going to say Mystery Shopping but that's probably a no no where you are concerned). I think too that you need to tackle your reasons for spending - is it to make you happy when you are down or is it the fact that money burns a hole in your pocket and you have to spend it?

Try one of the debt charities such as CCCS or Christians against Poverty.

At some point you will need to do an SOA especially if you enter a DMP with a debt charity - don't waste your money on using a company as they will charge you and your money will go towards their fee and not your debt.

When you feel ready use this calculator https://www.makesenesofcards.com/soacalc.html and follow the instructions to copy and paste it to MSE.

not_so_good

Popped over from my diary - I'll keep an eye on yours as we've had our LBM at similar times and we spend our public holidays in the rain watching bands . I have a similar problem as you - I love to spend money, doesn't matter what on or for whom, just as long as I can spend! But no more - let's get out of this mess once and for all!

Good luck with your DF journey, let's walk together.

KatieShopstoomuch

Thanks for replies! I have done my SOA and printed it off to take to CAB although i haven't posted it on here yet. I don't think it is to make me feel happy because i'm usually quite happy with myself and my life. I think it just spend it because it's there then i feel guilty because that £20 could have gone towards a debt! Also i know i spoil my DD too much so that has to stop. Her room is like a toy shop yikes!

Thanks notsogood yeah seems we've started around the same time! I went overboard with aftersun last night still have no idea how i managed to get sunburnt! I'm just like that too it doesn't matter what it spend it on or who it is for! I'm spending no more and saving! Well beating my debts THEN saving lol

KatieShopstoomuch

Also a bit about me. I'm sure you've gathered but i'm now a recovering spendaholic!
I live at home with my DD, i'm out of work at the moment studying towards a degree trying to sort out all the student finance for September time my head hurts! I do some volunteer work with surestart. I sort of have a OH lol we did live together for some time but it's not for me i need my own space and ME time, so we just meet up and have nice times together but i wouldn't say we are serious, still three years down the line i NEVER want to live with a man again (no offence to other men) lol.

I've so far got rid of my contract phone and am on PAYG. I've changed my phone line to a £14.99 one each month which includeds broadband and free landline calls.
I've changed my 1.7 car to a 1.2 which does seem to take a lot less petrol, although any time i can walk to a place i will! I hardly use the car anymore really only for big shopping trips or long journeys. My insurance is due for renewal at the end of August i pray it's a little bit cheaper!
I've got a christmas list of all i need to buy, although i'm totally concentrated on my debts if i see anything i intend to get for xmas and it is majourly reduced or on offer i'll try to pick it up, so that way i hopefully will avoid any xmas debt!
I'm thinking of doing my shopping online this week? I tend to chuck stuff in the trolley that i don't need and that aren't on my list, at least if i do it online i can just type the items into search without seeing all the temptations! However i know i do need to learn to shop and ignore the rest of the shelves.
Also had a chicken for dinner last night so going to use the leftovers for soup tonight.

not_so_good

Well done for doing your SOA - I think it focuses the mind. I too want to go back to studying but with OU if I can get work to help with the costs - really couldn't afford it otherwise.

What age is your DD - think we need to smuggle some of the toys away and put them on ebay (DS probably wouldn't notice).

KatieShopstoomuch

I've tried but i cannot help feel guilty there are so many baby born, chou chou, and barbie products in my DDs room that she doesn't play with anymore but each time i try to nab some for ebay i just feel sooooooo guilty. Will maybe go through her room with her and see what she doesn't mind getting rid of, i'll use the excuse it's to make room for xmas in time for santa coming! She is six going on 20! What age is your DS?

I'm trying to get two assignments completed for the OU want to get them out of the way in time for September, that is also another addiction of mine i love the OU! Certainly ask your work to help i'm sure they would more so if it's a course that applies to your job or will give you more experience? Have you checked with the finance department if you can get any grants or course fees help?

Yorkshirechick

I would dfeinitely say try and smuggle some toys out and sell them. I've just cleared 2 huge bags of toys out of my lad's room and he didn't even notice! I would sell his, but we're saving them for the next one. Then that's it I'm definitley getting rid. My front room looks like Toys R Us.

KatieShopstoomuch

Yes i will do so, she has far too many things! I'm trying to decide if it's better to do a carboot sale or just ebay/ebid.

Just started making the soup for this evening then i have a mountain of washing to sort so i better get off MSE again. Will be back later to make a list of things i must do tomorrow!

Yorkshirechick

I've started my list already, and it has too much on it!! Hope you get everything done that you need to, and that your soup is nice.

KatieShopstoomuch

Well that was yummy tea/dinner! It was quite early for me too i don't usually eat until 6ish but i know my DD needs a very longggggggg bath this evening and i must get extra studying done! Decided my list is slightly large so it's a list of things i have got to do by the end of this week!
I must......

• Get these letters sent off to NDR!
• Make a meal plan and shopping list
• Get sun cream as cheap as possible (Holiday soon)
• Sort DDs room and get some stuff for ebay
• List 10 items on ebay/ebid
• Prepare FOS form incase capital ones second response is to get lost (very likely)
• Take DD to park with her bike
• Finish end of course assignments for OU courses
• Strip bathroom wallpaper off ready for repaint
• Chase up student finance to send on my birth certificate
• Make docs appointment for something i've been ignoring - yikes!
• Also must ring tax credits argh!
• Try not to smoke try not to smoke try not to smoke!!

Phew! I'll be busy, i have to ring tax credits as they have had my renewal info over the phone twice and i had a letter from them saying they need new info by the 16th! Cannot get through on the phone will try again pleaseeeeeeeeeeee let me get through tonight i'm worried my money will stop, last thing i need! Hopefully the list will keep me motivated and i can get through it quickly i've so many more things to do but these are the most important at the moment!

As for the holiday this was before my 'LBM' and [STRIKE]probably[/STRIKE] WAS a very big mistake however i cannot get the money back now and luckily we went all inclusive so i won't be taking much spending money, infact probably only 150 euro although i've got loads of money off vouchers for attractions near the resort.