Keeping motivated

StuTheDon

Hi Guys,

My wife and I are overpaying our mortgage every month and sacrificing on things we would like such as nice holidays, new cars etc. We see all our friends doing these things, and I know that in 9 years we will be MF, but sometimes I think there is more to life than overpaying. What if I get run over by a bus tomorrow - drastic I know!!

I was initially very enthusiastic and was amazed at the number of years we are going to knock off the term but now that has worn off we are really struggling.

How do you guys keep motivated?

whitewing

We make lists and have challenges! For example, rather than just buy DS new clothes, we work out what he needs for his lifestyle, when he needs it, and what he will wear. Then we buy accordingly. So twice a year we get a 'fashion parade' where he models all the crumpled stuff that is too short so we can charity shop it or recycle. I find this kind of stuff quite fun. We then set a budget and may even work out how we are going to meet the budget. So, if I wasn't too lazy to do it, in an ideal world we'd ebay his old clothes to fund his new.

We still do the things that are important; we just do them differently. So, we may go out for the day but we have a budget and we use money-off vouchers (if available).

We're fussier about what we do do. We still enjoy ourselves immensely but we don't waste money by doing stuff we like three times a week. We maybe do it once a month but really look forward to it and really enjoy it and enjoy having done it. (Free stuff we obviously do more frequently and enjoy it!)

I (am somewhat odd but) also find it easier to overpay as & when. For example, DH gets paid weekly. I find it more fun to allocate one week' wages as an overpayment and do it via internet banking than have an invisible standing order for a set amount for a set time of the month. For me it still counts as 'spending money' if my balance goes down; doesn't matter if I am paying my mortgage or a tacky 'kissmequick' hat! I was born to spend.

TOPAZ_2

StuTheDon,

It sounds like you need a more balanced approach to life.

Although like you - I am going hell for leather to pay off the mortgage in just 5 years - I still allocate some money to holidays and replacement cars.

On holidays, I try to keep the costs down (never borrow to go on holiday), and find more interesting ways (that cost less) to have fun. Although I choose not to fly/go abroad, there are lots of ways to go abroad for less - I am sure that others will be wiser than me here. And dont just think about the annual holiday - include some weekend breaks too. Holidays are one of the places where you build your life long memories. Dont eliminate these from your life just for the sake of the mortgage.

On the cars front, I just dont replace them as often, always pay cash - never take out a loan (save up first) and look for good MPG - low Tax and Insurance Groups - and reasonable servicing costs. I dont buy new, I have a budget and I stick to it.

On the seeing friends spending lots of money situation, what you dont know is whether they are living within their means - they could be doing this all on credit. (I know some of my friends do everything on credit).

What I try to keep in mind, is that when the interest rates shoot up and down - everyone else is worrying about whether they can afford the mortgage - you wont be once its gone. Also (hope I dont jinx you) if you get made redundant - you will never lose the house - this is my single biggest motivation at the moment - all the exotic holidays and wild overspending that my friends are doing, doesnt compare to the increasing sense of security that I am feeling each time I make and overpayment.

Sorry for waffling - but it sounds like you need to find both balance in your life, and a clearer idea of what is motivating you to pay off your mortgage, other than just not having one.

Good luck with the decisions you make
Topaz

Peelerfart

StuTheDon wrote: »

Hi Guys,

My wife and I are overpaying our mortgage every month and sacrificing on things we would like such as nice holidays, new cars etc. We see all our friends doing these things, and I know that in 9 years we will be MF, but sometimes I think there is more to life than overpaying. What if I get run over by a bus tomorrow - drastic I know!!

I was initially very enthusiastic and was amazed at the number of years we are going to knock off the term but now that has worn off we are really struggling.

How do you guys keep motivated?

Can honestly say I've had the exact same thoughts. We don't have to give this money away ,it's ours we can spend it .

Then I look at our closest friends ,one couple on an IVA depending on an inhertiance to pay off the mortgage ,and the others ,better off but still scraping aound looking for money and have twenty years left on a mortgage .

We've got about five years left hopefully - Keep the faith Stu .

Peelerfart

'spose what I'm saying is - find poorer friends ! :rotfl:

Lynn11

We are still doing our normal things like going out once a month due to babysitting arrangements and also money and going on holiday next week, but we overpay at least £220-£300 a month to the mortgage in the hope that this will reduce our mortgage amount to move to a slightly larger house and hopefully also reduce our term of mortgage. It does get dishearting but every bit helps and hope that you keep on plodding along and do not give up too many things or your will regret it even though you will have paid off your mortgage early - you need to live also.

StuartGMC

StuTheDon wrote: »

Hi Guys,

My wife and I are overpaying our mortgage every month and sacrificing on things we would like such as nice holidays, new cars etc. We see all our friends doing these things, and I know that in 9 years we will be MF, but sometimes I think there is more to life than overpaying. What if I get run over by a bus tomorrow - drastic I know!!

Stu
Firstly your last comment is valid; dip into my thread for some comments on such issues. I think you need to look at your household budget and determine what things you need to have in life to ensure you remain motivated. Also is your target date too ambitious?

Personally we always holiday abroad, our daughter therefore has since about 3 been used to travel and then as she has grown has gained much in seeing history in context and other cultures, and religions so at 11 now she is well rounded. For me, it is a definite need to get away from the stress of the job. So in our budget, the saving for the holiday is a "necessity" whereas we don't eat out often or have takeaways.

I treated my self to the S-Type Jag a few years ago (3yr old) because otherwise I was feeling I wasn't gaining anything tangible for the hours etc.

These can be MSE (holiday - booked early) or not (a 3.0L petrol engine...) but the latter can carry high "emotional" value so plan to have some nice things too.

That said (and there's so much more to wade through in my diary ) we've overpaid since the mortgage started in 1994, but the amount dropped when OH went part-time when DD was born. So we are now close to clearing hopefully 10yrs early, and the peace of mind is a great motivator as I was affected in the last recession and saw people around repossessed etc. However, we have continued with our pensions, savings (offset) plus since 2006 investing in Funds in our ISAs (18% down today..). The mortgage is just one part of the overall plan, and is considered along side the formal review I sit down and do each 3yrs to look at the 5, 10yr and longer plans and objectives.

If you don't have a detailed household budgeting spreadsheet I can send you the one I've offered to others here, just use the Personal Message to send me your e-mail address.

I hope that you can both sit down and do a review, mind-map the whole thing not just financial and then start to draw some plans together which you will review and modify in future.

Best wishes on remaining on target but happier!

setmefree2

Hi Stu,

I also think you need some treats.....some things I'll happily do without (eg new car) some things I make do with (eg clothes) some things I think are important (eg kids out of school activities, my own "hobbies", holidays)....it's finding the right balance for you...

Remember "it's a marathon not a sprint"

Tesco_points_addict

I always find the following useful:

I earn x per hour after stoppages at work e.g. £10. Therfore if I want a treat that cost £55 I would have to work 5.5 hours to earn it. More often than not the 5.5 hours are not worth the treat! Just a different way of looking at 'spends'.

TPAx

StuTheDon

thanks guys - some great advice there. I think we are overstretching ourselves - i earn a good wage and we overpay by almost 700 per month. It is easy to get caught up in the figures and spreadsheets but then a few months down the line it wears off. I think we'll perhaps look at our spending and see if we can be more efficient, or reduce the OP slightly.

StuartGMC - many thanks - will PM you shortly.

Glad to see I'm not the only one!!