Ex partner causing problems in work

looby75

I'm posting this on behalf of my sister.

A bit of back ground info, my sister works for a small charity and started working for them last November, she is pregnant and due to give birth in 3 weeks time but hasn't started her maternity leave yet as her job isn't physically demanding and she intends to work right up to when she gives birth if possible, she also plans to take no more than 3 months for maternity leave. She told her employers she was pg at her interview but they were keen to have her come work for them anyway.

Just after she found out she was pregnant her partner decided that he didn't want another child with her (they already have a child together) and walked out, she didn't see or hear much from him since then. Recently she has met up with an old school friend, and while there is a "chemistry" between them sis has made it clear that she's not interested in a relationship right now she just wants to concentrate on her children, so they have agreed to remain "just good friends" and what ever happens in the future is in the future. Her ex has found out about this friendship and all of a sudden is very keen to get back with sis :rolleyes: Sis feels ex has shown his true colours when he did a runner and refuses to take him back.

So now her ex keeps phoning her in work (they have a help line which he keeps using asking to speak to her) and keeps turning up at their help desk demanding to see her. At first her boss was really supportive, but now he demanding she goes on maternity leave and to have at least 6 months off after the baby is born and not to come back to work until her ex has "got the message" at one point her boss even said something along the lines of because she's not been working there for a year yet they don't have to take her back after her maternity leave if they don't want too. :eek:

Does anyone know if they can make her take a certain amount of maternity leave or where she stands because she hasn't worked there for a year yet?

alwaysonthego_2

Although she does not have many employment rights because she has worked less than a year, if they did not take her back after her maternity leave then it could be considered sexual discrimination. Your sister needs to contact the police and get a restrainig order or similar. She needs to make a diary of all incidences because it is against the law for her ex to harrass her.

looby75

alwaysonthego wrote: »

Although she does not have many employment rights because she has worked less than a year, if they did not take her back after her maternity leave then it could be considered sexual discrimination. Your sister needs to contact the police and get a restrainig order or similar. She needs to make a diary of all incidences because it is against the law for her ex to harrass her.

she has spoken to the police but tbh they weren't at all helpful, because he isn't violent or threatening and always leaves when he's told to, they say they can't do anything. Yes he does leave straight away, but then he phones instead her work hours change each week so he often calls when she's not there which is also causing problems because it means her collegues have to deal with him when she's not there.

alwaysonthego_2

Can she pop down to the local CAB who should be able to direct her to a solicitor that offers free half an hour session that maybe able to advice her on the different types of orders she can take out on him to prevent him from approaching her. It must be very stressful for your sister.

looby75

she's a bit embarrassed about going to the CAB, her charity works quite closely with them and she's not too keen on having them know the inside outs of her personal business. She thinks it might make it really uncomfortable working with them in the future. She has tried to go to a different branch but it's very hard to get an appointment with them as they cover a large area.

I will suggest looking for a solicitor who gives free sessions though, it may be something she can ask for on behalf of one of her clients

She's handling it really well I think, her ex doesn't bother her so much she's just worried about losing her job.

DCFC79

looby75 wrote: »

she's a bit embarrassed about going to the CAB, her charity works quite closely with them and she's not too keen on having them know the inside outs of her personal business. She thinks it might make it really uncomfortable working with them in the future. She has tried to go to a different branch but it's very hard to get an appointment with them as they cover a large area.

I will suggest looking for a solicitor who gives free sessions though, it may be something she can ask for on behalf of one of her clients

She's handling it really well I think, her ex doesn't bother her so much she's just worried about losing her job.

but surely what your sister were to tell the CAB would stay within the CAB and not reach anyone else outside of the CAB, would the CAB know your sister by name, she doesnt have to say she works with a charity so she could say she works somewhere else, i could be wrong though

alwaysonthego_2

DCFC79 wrote: »

but surely what your sister were to tell the CAB would stay within the CAB and not reach anyone else outside of the CAB, would the CAB know your sister by name, she doesnt have to say she works with a charity so she could say she works somewhere else, i could be wrong though

Yes you are correct, anything that is said in the CAB remains in the CAB and they take confidentiality very seriously. The advisers have to sign confidentiality clauses/contracts. If your sister does not want to speak to an adviser she can request another one depending on the work load. When advising on the phones, I have recognised people so I usually tell them who I am to give them the choice if they want me to advice them and I do make it clear that anything they tell me will not go any further apart from my superviser etc.

looby75

DCFC79 wrote: »

but surely what your sister were to tell the CAB would stay within the CAB and not reach anyone else outside of the CAB, would the CAB know your sister by name, she doesnt have to say she works with a charity so she could say she works somewhere else, i could be wrong though

I think she's more embarrassed on a professional level. They know her pretty well in the local branch, she deals with them on a face to face basis quite a lot and is often in their offices as much as she's in her own. (it's a debt management charity and she specialises in mortgage problems)

Her local branch doesn't do phone advice only drop in and appointment sessions.

alwaysonthego_2

Can she not phone another branch out of her locality. I sometimes take calls that are out of our area.

looby75

alwaysonthego wrote: »

Can she not phone another branch out of her locality. I sometimes take calls that are out of our area.

thats a good idea (talk about missing the obvious solution ) !

Would they have info of solicitors etc in her area?

alwaysonthego_2

looby75 wrote: »

thats a good idea (talk about missing the obvious solution ) !

Would they have info of solicitors etc in her area?

It depends, at our office we do not have info on solicitors that offer free sessions in other areas and would refer the caller to their local CAB.