Help! Over 6 months pregnant and don't know about benefits

cazza35

Hi everyone,

I'm currently over 6 months pregnant and suffer from depression and an ME type illness.

I was on incapacity benefit but was denied it after a medical last May. I have not received any money from anywhere since then and my depression has worsened considerably because I feel I have no independence, no money, can't go out on my own etc.

My fiance works full time and is on £26,000 a year but has been told there will be no pay rise this year.

Does this not class us a low income family? If we were both on £13,000 it would seem pretty low.

I am waiting to hear from the Community Psychiatric Nurses in my area but don't know how they can help me move forward.

I feel that every time I ask for help I'm turned down and end up in tears on the phone and can't always understand why I keep hitting a brick wall.

How do they expect you to get better when they pull the rug from under you?

Since they stopped my money our credit card is maxed out as we needed it for food and clothing as every penny my other half earns goes on the house and bills.

I'm really worried now that we won't be able to look after the baby properly, our gas fire hasn't worked for over a year and we can't afford to get it looked at.

I'm having to rely on my brother and father (who's dying of cancer) to get me essential baby stuff.

The strain is becoming unbearable and I hear that the Citizens Advice can't help much with these types of problems anymore.

Can anyone please give some advice or am I just not important enough to the NHS, Government to help.

Sorry for the rant, thanks for reading.
Caz xx

Marcheline

Hi Caz, I'm really sorry to hear about your problems. On the advice front though, you will not be classed as a low income family on £26k a year, in fact, this would be regarded as quite a decent income (although how far the moey goes obv depends on where you live)

When the baby comes, you will get £80 month child benefit and you will prob get a small amount of child tax credit too. You will also be eligible for a Health in Pregnancy grant shortly. On top of this, you may qualify for Maternity Allowance, but you will have to research this yourslef as I do not know your situation. I have always found http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/MoneyTaxAndBenefits/BenefitsTaxCreditsAndOtherSupport/Expectingorbringingupchildren/index.htm this website very helpful.

Good luck.

Marcheline

Also, just wanted to add, if your credit card debt is getting on top of you, have you been on to the debt free wannabe board on here yet? The people on there are very friendly and they will help you identify where in your budget you can cut back/improve things. Gotta go now, my daughter's up!

DaisyFlower

I think you do need to look at what your spending. £26k is a good wage and should easily be enough to support two adults and a baby.

Once the baby is born, you'll get £80 a month in CB and approx £80 a month tax credits (reducing to £42 a month once the baby reaches 1).

Adding the stresses of a baby if already struggling financially may cause even more problems so you need to resolve the issue before the baby comes along.

welshmoneylover

There are families living on a lot less than £26,000 where I live and they seem to be coping just find!

Mojisola

cazza35 wrote: »

I'm currently over 6 months pregnant and suffer from depression and an ME type illness.

I was on incapacity benefit but was denied it after a medical last May.

It's a shame you didn't appeal at the time but if your medical condition hasn't improved then it would be worth applying again. Get help filling in the forms.

Do follow the advice about going onto the debt free board. You'll get lots of help.

hanny83_2

Hi, sorry I don't have any constructive advice but I doubt you'd be entitled to ESA (the new form of IB) as you may not have earned enough NI conts. Income Related ESA would not apply either as £26k is not really classed as a low income, sorry

bestpud

I agree you need to start reducing your outgoings rather than looking for benefits. I also find it extraordinary you are allowing your dying father to subsidse your adequate income. He must think you are realy struggling when, in reality, you are simply not managing your income properly!

With an income of £26k there is no excuse for buying clothes on credit and you are definitely overspending somewhere.

Time to take responsibility for yourselves and stop adding to your father's problems, as I see it. If you are mature enough to have a child, you are mature enough to budget for him/her.

Bills and housing costs alone should be nowhere near that amount! Unless you are living in a mansion?

There is the debt free wannabe board as said, and also the oldstyle and/or shopping boards for reducing your grocery and household bills.

Have a look and think about switching suppliers for utlilities like gas and electricity too.

One last point - you don't need a gas fire - we haven't used ours in years and haven't missed it either.

Marcheline

While I might agree with you in theory bestpud, I think that 'kicking Caz while she's down' is only going to be counterproductive.

Caz, does your fiance know how you're feeling? Also, the minute the baby arrives, I would recommend getting as much info as you can from your local SureStart Children's Centre http://www.surestart.gov.uk/ about local services etc so that you don't feel so isolated (there are lots of free activities for the under 5s in urban areas that will help you mix with other mums)

As well as this, if you find that you are not coping as well as you'd hoped when your little one is born, you can contact HomeStart, which is a charity run by volunteers helping people who maybe just need a bit of extra support. The volunteers can help you in many ways, see here for further info http://www.home-start.org.uk/needsupport/

Finally, I would also recommend that you sign up to www.netmums.com and go to the Meet a Mum board, you can post a message on there/reply to other people's messages and hopefully you will meet some nice local mums, again this might stop you feeling so down.

Hope this helps

feelinggood_2

Cazza - have you been totally honest with the Midwife about how you are feeling? I've suffered from depression and related problems for a few years, and I'm pregnant too. When I told the Midwife about my history, I was put under 'Consultant Care' and the Consultant has been very helpful. They can often give the Mental Health team a bit of a kick, if they are acting too slowly. I know what you mean about hitting brick walls, but I've found the Midwife and Consultant to be very helpful. I also got to meet the local Health Visitor while still pregnant, to get information about support and services available for after I've had the baby.

I agree with the above, can you look at cutting your outgoings? I know its hard, but if you and OH can sit down and go through your finances, you'll hopefully be able to make a big difference. Make sure you look around the site and get all the help you can.

Have you looked into Disability Living Allowance? It depends on your care and mobility needs, so it might not be relevant, but have a read:
http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/DisabledPeople/FinancialSupport/DG_10011731

bestpud

Marcheline wrote: »

While I might agree with you in theory bestpud, I think that 'kicking Caz while she's down' is only going to be counterproductive.

Yes, you're probably right.

I was a little irked that a dying man has had this completely unnecessary responsibility thrust upon him.

But I guess from her post that the OP truly believes they are living hand to mouth, and it is education and support they need, not criticism.

Definitely have a gander round the boards cazza because you can get your outgoings down and money worries will only exacerbate your depression.