RSVPs = grrr! Advice needed please...

Minxy_Bella

Right, now I'm getting married in 13 days (eek!) and am having quite a small wedding (40 guests) with 80 more invited to the evening do, which is at a separate venue. (It's been like organising two different weddings!!!)

I sent out Save the Date cards a year ago. Formal invitations were sent out 12 weeks ago.

I've invited one of my three half-brothers and his girlfriend (I don't really know the other two and they live miles away so probably wouldn't come anyway) and he said that they'd come etc etc.

Now, I haven't seen him for a few months as I've been very ill and have a busy life anyway - but he is the only one who hasn't replied formally to the wedding invite.

I sent him a text a few weeks ago to ask him if he was coming and the response was 'Yes, I think so, it's in the morning, isn't it?' Which took me aback a bit as it was rather casual. So I texted him back to ask if he was able to come to the evening do as well - getting an equally vague reply.

My OH has been on my case about finding out if they're coming for definite - which I've been reluctant to do as I think they're being rude and I don't want to burn any bridges but I've sent him an email today (no matter how I tried to word it, it still sounded accusatory!). I'm now wondering what to do if he doesn't reply by the end of the week.....

If they don't turn up on the day, I'm going to be furious - as I could have invited two other people who'd have been pleased to come plus it's £50odd a head that I'll lose!

I don't really want to phone him to chase him up if he doesn't email so what should I do?

Leave it until Friday and email back, saying I'm assuming he's not coming or just leave it full stop and see if he turns up on the day (and then never speak to him again if he doesn't :rolleyes:).

MTIA

xxx

fiscalfreckles

I'd firstly see if he replies (properly!) to the email you've just sent, and if not ring him. Or get your OH or the best man to ring him, if you think you'll get cross.

Whoever it is should say something like, "Really sorry to keep bothering you, but we need to know definite numbers to advise the venue, so I'm just checking that you are coming both to the day & evening of the wedding?"

Or they could try speaking to his girlfriend?

I'm sure he will come, he probably thinks he's told you.

Try & stay calm, its frustrating, I know, but some people are very offhand about these things and don't consider the cost to the organisers at all.

I hope it all works out and you have a great day.

lindaatno9

I'd be inclined to call and apologise for chasing him but you need to firm up the numbers. Tell him it's ok if he doesn't want to come and you'll understand. That way you let him off the hook if he's embars=assed to say he no longer wants to come, and you will know for defo. It may be a bit late to invite someone else but at least you can inform the venue of the last minute number change.
HTH x

Minxy_Bella

Thanks for the replies - he has come back to me saying he'll come but he's got another commitment for the middle part of the day, so at least now I know he'll be there for the ceremony and evening do!

Men, huh!?!

xxx