Door to Door sales reps. please don't ring sticker

sandra_fletcher

outbidder wrote:

I have a sign that I made up and laminated that simply says:

"NO COLD CALLERS, THANK YOU"

You'd be surprised how many people knock having no clue what it means. I am going to have to rewrite it in words of one syllable so it can be understood.

It also means I have stopped receiving my free newspapers now which I do actually want so maybe I can draw up a Top 10 and put that up instead:

1. No salesmen, women or third gender
2. Please give me free newspapers
3. If you claim not to be selling anything, why are you bothering me?
4. No, Darren does not live here, try the renting students next door
5. No I do not know the way to anywhere, do I look like tourist information?
6. No you can't use the phone, I have to pay for my calls you know
7. If you leave a catalogue, I will watch it crackle on my open fire
8. If you knock the door with a catalogue I will watch you crackle on my open fire
9. I don't have a dog but come in uninvited and I will bite you
10. I'm a nice person really and if you are welcome you will find that out

LOL

Do they all say there are very warm!!!!!!

excellent I Like you new list, I think I will make one up for the whole of the front door so they can knock anywhere and disconnect the bell.

You could put one up saying

I have all the double glazing I want
I do not use gas
I do not use electricity (only candles)
I have not got a phone
I do not believe in any god
Put anything through my door and it will go straight into the recyle bin
Knock at your own risk

Marigold123

My friend's son used to love answering the phone when people wanted to sell double glazing.

Hello, I'm calling from *insert company name here* and I'd like to talk to you about double glazing.

Sorry, about what?

Double glazing.

What's that?

It's... um... glazing for windows.

I'm sorry we haven't got any windows.

Er... you haven't got any windows?

No. We live underground.

Oh...... *long pause* Well we can also offer you double glazing for your front door.

Oh no, we don't have a door either.

What do you mean, you don't have a door!

We have an airlock.

An AIRLOCK?!

Yes, an airlock.

Why?

It's safer, you see. The germs can't get in. You haven't got any germs have you?

- By this point everyone but the very determined or terminally stupid has given up, and the rest of the family have had to go and change their underwear!

pdoff

our beware of the dog sign that the previous owners left works a treat! takeaway delivery bods knock on the window instead of coming through the gate to the door aswell. unfortunately the dodgy neighbours who have no phone know we don't have a dog.