F+FS ben accepted by LLoyds!

code-a-holic

Tondella wrote:

wel, clearly she is a generous woman, maybe if you asked her whether she could give (or even loan) you the money for the seven seater then she would be quite happy to help. You need to tell her that the loan settlement was only £9k though, tell a little white lie and say that you managed to haggle even lower with Lloyds, or that when they sent you a statement they gave a lower settlement figure than on the phone or something. Will you be selling one of your cars when you get the seven seater? Maybe you should give the proceeds of that car back to your MIL (or at least offer to).

My original idea was to ask her for a loan but for some reason my husband is not happy to at all. I will ask him again about it.
She is a very generous woman - The money they inherited was her dads - when he died he stated in the will that it wouldnt be shared between the daughters until his wife(a second wife that didnt get on with daughters) died. Ever since i met mother in law she said that when the money came it would be here for all of us to enjoy. She is very sweet.
Will be selling my car once we have a replacement - thats a good idea - thank you

ceegee

code-a-holic wrote:

-Currently re-thinking my whole attitude to life - cant believe i got carried away and agreed to do what we have done - i am normally very moralistic...the idea of fixing all of our 'problems' in one swoop masked what was 'right'

You obviously got carried away in the heat of the moment. Your MIL appears to be a kind lady....I think she would appreciate your honesty in telling her everything. I also think that you would feel a lot better about it too! Hope it all works out for you. :cool:

Twopints

Have you got written confirmation that the reduced amount is being accepted as full and final settlement? I wouldn't pay it until you have it in writing.

code-a-holic

Twopints wrote:

Have you got written confirmation that the reduced amount is being accepted as full and final settlement? I wouldn't pay it until you have it in writing.

They said they would send it today - and also aleter would be sent once payment is made confirming it is clear and that credit agencies would be notified.

fairylights_2

I have to agree with Tondella - you really need to tell her the truth - via a little white lie to save argument, I think.

You need to be completely fair with her - what she's offered is fantastic, but she'll get upset you fibbed to her, and you'll feel bad when you get your new car.

We've been through this ourselves (not with inheritance money though) and I'm just too honest to fib. When we realised how bad debt we were in, I talked it through with FIL (who is VERY well off) and told him we didn't want the money to pay it all off, we wanted advice as to the best way to start. It wasn't really advice we couldn't have got from here, but for us it was the right way to tell them we wouldn't be spending a lot of cash in the near future.

I would go round with a big bunch of flowers to say thank you, and tell her the settlement was less than you thought. Ask her if she can wait to have the £3000 back - explain you really need a bigger car, and want to sell yours to get a 7 seater. I'm sure if you're honest with her, she'll be happier than you taking her money so you no longer have to live on credit and then turning up in a new car.

Good luck!

loubie_lou

You are vitually stealing £3000

MORPH3US

fairylights wrote:

I would go round with a big bunch of flowers to say thank you, and tell her the settlement was less than you thought. Ask her if she can wait to have the £3000 back - explain you really need a bigger car, and want to sell yours to get a 7 seater. I'm sure if you're honest with her, she'll be happier than you taking her money so you no longer have to live on credit and then turning up in a new car.

Just what I was going to suggest minus the flowers of course cos i'm a tight !!!!!!! :rotfl: - no wonder my GF says i'm not romantic

juliag

i agree, she obviously loves you dearly and you her, tell her that you have got figure down and how you did it, she should be impressed we are! well done! but tell her now that you need bigger car and would she mind if you used the extra money to buy it. simple really isnt it and no guilt or lies everyones a winner, well done and good luck to you......julia

postingalwaysposting

yes i agree with fairy lights, she is doing this for you out of kindness, she doesnt have to you know and you repay her buy taking more and then buying a car?? I think you need to sit down with her and have a little chat, even if she then says keep the money and get your car. I am sure she will understand she is you mil after all