How can I help him?

chalkie99

Just had a quick scan through so apologies if I have missed it - but.......

what is the business?

does he have premises?

what is he doing to try and turn his business around?

milliejon

Thank you both .... I'm ashamed to say to say that I sort of gave up on him. I couldn't keep trying to help as he was not admitting that there was a problem. But, it's got worse .... much worse. I've had a thoroughly depressing evening with his number and sister. The business has now ceased trading. They have 2.5 months to find nearly £100k to pay off the loan or lose the house. They are in a terrible state, and he's not even apologised!

I don't have a problem with him loosing the business, and making really stupid decisions - he's human, and has to live with his decisions. His mum and sister have come to terms with the fact that the house was there to protect the bank for such this kind of risk (they for some reason hadn't realised this - or didn't want to!). But, he hasn't accepted responsibility for any of this, and now that the business is closed, he sits all day in his room, not sorting his stuff out!

To make things worse, one of the debts is to the tax office, so I think there's a huge possibility that he'll end up in prison too. He's ignored letters - to do with his business and personal debts - and will now no doubt become bankrupt. In short, I'm very angry with him but don't feel it's my place to say anything.

However, rant over now ..... what I would really like is some advice. I'm trying to think of ways to raise the money to pay off the £97k debt. The obvious way is to sell the house, but they're reluctant to do that as it's been in the family for 40(ish) years. I wondered about whether his sister and I could try for a joint mortgage, but my credit rating is rubbish, and I also don't live in the property. His sister doesn't earn enough to get a mortgage on her own ..... so I'm really at a loss.

Any advice would be appreciated.

rak2

I'm sorry, I am far too new at this to have any advice, but I've just read the whole thread and feel for you all.
So I'm bumping it.

RAS

Millie

In whose name(s) are the ddeds to the house?

And how much is the loan that is secured on the house?

chalkie99

Hi and sorry to hear of your continuing worries.

You say he has 2.5 months to find nearly 100k to pay off the loan but, reading back, it looks like he was "only" £20k in debt in August last year.

Is it the case that he really is £100k down now or does he have a £100k loan facility and is actually less in debt than that? I can imagine it is probably difficult for you to get to the bottom of it if he still has his head in the sand.

You have said, previously, that your mum didn't really appreciate the loan was putting her house at risk. Did she actually sign documents to hand over the security or could your brother, possibly have signed her name to something without her knowledge to dupe the bank?

I think the tax is his most serious worry, other than the house, so at least try and get him to speak to them - other creditors might give up the chase if they think there is no money there but HMRC won't.

milliejon

RAS wrote: »

Millie

In whose name(s) are the ddeds to the house?

And how much is the loan that is secured on the house?

Hi Ras

The deeds are in his mum's name, and the loan secured against is £97k.

chalkie99 wrote: »

Hi and sorry to hear of your continuing worries.

You say he has 2.5 months to find nearly 100k to pay off the loan but, reading back, it looks like he was "only" £20k in debt in August last year.

Is it the case that he really is £100k down now or does he have a £100k loan facility and is actually less in debt than that? I can imagine it is probably difficult for you to get to the bottom of it if he still has his head in the sand.

You have said, previously, that your mum didn't really appreciate the loan was putting her house at risk. Did she actually sign documents to hand over the security or could your brother, possibly have signed her name to something without her knowledge to dupe the bank?

I think the tax is his most serious worry, other than the house, so at least try and get him to speak to them - other creditors might give up the chase if they think there is no money there but HMRC won't.

Sorry Chalkie - I've obviously confused the debts. The £20k I referred to over a year ago was his personal debt - which is now higher but I have no idea how much this is now.

The £100k is the business loan against the house. There's nothing untoward going on, his mum signed the documents with a solicitor, but I'm pretty sure that (even though she was told) she wasn't really sure what she was doing.

He's tried speaking to the HMRC, but too late, they're going to start proceedings because he ignored their letters etc.

This is such a mess. I spoke frankly with his mum, and said that she has to weigh up not selling the house against the angst that she'll have trying to raise the money.

This is so depressing because all I can do is watch what's going on and offering support where I can.

ian_h

I fully understand your frustration I have a family member who also refuses to accept any personal responsibility and its hard looking in seeing the obvious and realising the one who can change things just wont do it.

Firstly he MUST (even if you have to drag him there) get some advice from CAB or similar - at this stage all is not lost but very soon it will be.

It may well be that with the amounts involved and the fact he has no income that Bankruptcy is the way forward for him personally. This can include the Tax Debts and please dont worry - prison is VERY unlikely, Bankruptcy is not as scary as it sounds.

The fact the deeds are in his mums name could give her an option - it will depend on the market value but perhaps equity release or a sale and lease back (either to a commercial landlord or family member who can get a buy to let mortgage) might mean they can all stay in the house.

He needs to understand that however nice the advisor at his bank - they are NOT his friend and have their own agenda, he needs his own too.

There are lots of variables so it will depend on the advice - and ensure the advisor looks at the effects on benefits for all involved too.

Very best of luck and I hope he realises how lucky he is to have you looking out for him and his family.

milliejon

Thank you so much Ian. We're trying to get him to speak to somebody, but he just won't! It is so frustrating.

Your answer has confirmed my thoughts. His sister (who also lives at the home) has spoken to her bank today. She could raise the money via a mortgage, so essentially her mum would sell the house (or part of it at least) to her. They're both seeing the solicitor on Wednesday.

I can't believe that its taking them so long to get themselves in gear to get things sorted. I feel like shaking them ..... !!

milliejon

Thank you so much Ian. We're trying to get him to speak to somebody, but he just won't! It is so frustrating.

Your answer has confirmed my thoughts. His sister (who also lives at the home) has spoken to her bank today. She could raise the money via a mortgage, so essentially her mum would sell the house (or part of it at least) to her. They're both seeing the solicitor on Wednesday.

I can't believe that its taking them so long to get themselves in gear to get things sorted. I feel like shaking them ..... !!