Green and white capsule tablet marked GH31? Updated

Savvy_Sue

wrt to not letting you know where he is and when he'll be back, my mum always used to say to me that I knew I was safe, but she didn't. And that she always told me where she was and when she'd be back, so please would I do the same with her.

funnily enough I find myself saying the same kind of things to my lads now. They know that if they want to avoid text messages followed by phone calls, they need to TELL me what's going on.

mae

Savvy_Sue wrote: »

wrt to not letting you know where he is and when he'll be back, my mum always used to say to me that I knew I was safe, but she didn't. And that she always told me where she was and when she'd be back, so please would I do the same with her.

funnily enough I find myself saying the same kind of things to my lads now. They know that if they want to avoid text messages followed by phone calls, they need to TELL me what's going on.

Thanks I completely agree and have told him this time and time again. He used to always tell me where he was infact he was pretty much a home bird most of school. Now he has a girlfriend he has become so disrespectful its really hurtful. I have done all the ringing and texting but he just ignored them, then I did the shouting/nagging/pleading when he came home to which he would say sorry and he understood my concern etc then he just does it again :mad: I am now trying the 'ignoring it' tactic which is killing me coz I feel like he is being allowed to get away with the basic rules of house/family. I have not seen him now since Friday and he hasn't even contacted me AT ALL. As in the past I would have rung/text like a demented woman I am now trying to not rise to it and I haven't rung or text him once BUT I am churning inside swinging from fuming to upset!!

I really don't know where to go with this at all. I will probably get home to him having had a shower and eating a full box of cereal like there is nothing wrong or he will just say something like 'yeah I'm sorry I knew I'd be in trouble so I just ignored it and have been feeling really bad' :mad: :eek:

What do I do? I know he is 17 but surely people agree this isn't acceptable? His girlfriend seems to be so high maintenance and always wants him to go to her house and she lives about 8 miles away, she finishes with him or threatens to if they disagree about who's house to go to and also he told me she in't happy if he goes out with his friends :eek: They are obsessed with each other I think and its only been 5 months. I have not met her parents but I keep toying with the idea of going round and seeing them coz I think what must they think him being there all the time and me not even contacting him? But I know he would be so angry and embarrassed if I did that so I would just be fuelling it?

We are and have always been close until all this


So I now have the answer on the tablet (thank goodness) but any ideas about the lack of repect and how to deal with it?

silver-birch

For the lack of response to Texts etc, I think I would repay like with like. When he (eventually) gets in touch to borrow money/ask for your help/know whats for tea etc I would be conveniently unavailable. To the question I was trying to ring /text you Mum I would just say 'I know,I just couldn't be bothered to reply, bit like you really'. Maybe he will get the message that if he can't be bothered then nor can you.

Kids,bless'em!!

Good luck
W

Stephb1986_2

I'm 22 years old and i stay at my fellas house friday till sunday i ring my mum on the saturday and on the sunday just to say hi or what ever she then knows im safe

I would do what silver-birch suggested dont reply to his txts or phone calls.

Steph xx

jeannieblue

He's being very selfish - just like alot of teenagers are...

I'd try and keep quiet, keep strong (easier said than done), if he wants to be the 'grown up independent' person, then let him have all the responsibilty that goes with it? does that make sense? Probably not! For example, if and when he comes back and wants clean clothes - direct him to the washing machine. If he wants money, direct him towards a job. If he wants anything, direct him to where he can get it or earn it himself.

He may hate you for it, but he will love you for it in the long run, when he has grown up and learnt to appreciate things that he has earnt and bought with his own money and grown into a grounded responsible man. And he will have more respect for you too, as you will have ceased to be the door mat.

Its hard and I am sorry, but he needs to learn, like some of the youth today, its not take, take, take.

And I bet you are now, hackles up, reading to protect him against me...

Thats cos you are a loving mum... its bloody hard being a mum x x x

Savvy_Sue

Well, it's easy for me to say because mine haven't ever let on about their gfs (although I'm not completely ignorant!) BUT if I had a contact phone no. for her or her family I think I would be in touch with an innocent "Oh, I just wondered if DS was with you, only I haven't heard from him since Friday and I thought perhaps his phone battery was flat / he was out of credit / he'd forgotten my number."

And, embarrassing mum that I am, I might well have the "This isn't a hotel, it's a family" conversation with a gf if I thought they were encouraging bad habits in my son (not saying when he'd be back, for example).

Only today I 'lost' DS2, not at home, mobile apparently switched off, and he only came home from Uni on Saturday! I wasn't worried, but I asked him just to let me know a little of his movements, so I know when to START worrying.

DS3 often goes to stay with a school friend on a Friday night, and I do have that lad's home phone no, have had a few conversations with the other lad's dad when DS isn't home when I asked him to be!

I know when I have their friends here I always check that their parents know where they are, and that they have a sane way of getting home.

A thought: your son is at college? Phone call to tutor to make sure he's attending OK? That might embarrass him into keeping in touch ...

Mutter_2

Updated? How?
I see nothing new here.

Tablet cold cure, and an overbearing mother who snoops around her son's bedroom and posts the findings over the internet.
Does he know I wonder?
Poor bloke.
Are you going to tell him?

mae

Mutter wrote: »

Updated? How?
I see nothing new here.

Tablet cold cure, and an overbearing mother who snoops around her son's bedroom and posts the findings over the internet.
Does he know I wonder?
Poor bloke.
Are you going to tell him?

:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:

I'm not ashamed of the way I parent, I'm proud

jeannieblue

Mutter wrote: »

Updated? How?
I see nothing new here.

Tablet cold cure, and an overbearing mother who snoops around her son's bedroom and posts the findings over the internet.
Does he know I wonder?
Poor bloke.
Are you going to tell him?

And that was helpful because.............. ???? Answers on a post card please.

Nope don't get it. Obviously more of a Nutter than a Mutter. :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:

How's it going Mae?? Heard anything as yet?

I'm hoping that you will be able to pick bits from all us that will help you in your situation.... I did the 'tough love' bit last night. Easy to write but hard to put into practice

Mutter_2

I wasn't trying to be helpful.
I was stating that children are entitled to privacy and why is it that some parents immediately think the worst.
Also jeannieblue, your rhyming remark shows your ignorance rather than wit, as Mutter is pronounced mooter and is German for Mother.