It is tough NOW. So how are we coping

pagangirl

elizabunn wrote:

Good luck Pagangirl, whether you decide to hunt for another job or become a 'Lady of Leisure' Although I think we would all agree that being and OS 'Lady of Leisure' is quite a demanding and full time job. Unpaid in the terms of actual cash, but profitable in terms of time and what you can achieve in that time. Time to cook from scratch, knit and maybe make your own clothes, and growing lovely crops in whatever tiny space you have -sprouting seeds don't take up much room at all and there's pots of herbs and speciality tomatoes. I must admit I was sort of forced down the 'Lady of Leisure' route which was really difficult financially, but I think in real terms, we are so much better off. I really hope things will turn out well for you whatever you decide to do next.]

Thanks for all your advice, being an OS lady of leisure is definitely a demanding and full time role atm, but getting better at it, walking loads, so getting healthier, have suprised myself by what I have managed to get done since finishing work. Have also found lots of free activities run by local council , so going to investigate them as well.

charliesaunt - thanks for the ideas - will give anything reasonable serious consideration, not sure about the allotment tho - used to have one years ago with ex, but dunno about one now, not with my arthritis ! :rotfl:


Slowandsteady - brilliants post - totally agree - hugs from me :grouphug:

declutterqueen

slowandsteady wrote: »

Evening everyone,

hope everyone is well,

thank you everyone for the kind words and support i appreciate it:)

I love the idea of dh taking me to work and would be very feasible if i get this job on wednesday-i havent found the exact place yet but ive a very good idea of where on the road it is and in reality i wouldnt need to use car except for shifts that fall on bank holidays. Unfortunately at moment it would mean a daily mileage of 80 miles, i do long days as do all staff there so a daily trip of 40 miles three times a week, on the motorway at the moment with me driving myself. Thanks for the idea though!

And you are also right, i am VERY lucky to have such a wonderful hubby and daughter, everything i do is for them, just sometimes i wish i could do more!

However i do feel better having a job and no longer having to sit at the awful job centre feeling as though im begging for help! I feel very much for any of us struggling to find work in this day and age and having to spend time at the jobcentre in any way, shape or form-no offence meant to any JCP staff on the forum, i always found the staff fantastic, just the whole environment etc is not conducive to boosting morale. Its so very hard for people looking for work at the moment, and that place used to put me on such a downer!

However i continue to remind myself that i am-

reducing waste and therefore supporting the environment in even a small way

feeding my family healthy, good, nutritious virtually chemical free food, practically free from pre packaged stuff

supporting local trades people by using markets etc

teaching my daughter life long lessons in cooking, budgeting, reducing waste and the need to get a good education and a career and rely on herself (well these lessons start early!)

a strong person who both on my own and with my hubby, has got through much much worse over the last few years, and got through it right to the other end, so if i can get through all those dramas, i can get through anything!

Well i feel a bit better now!

Again, i shall stop going on with myself and boring you and quietly catch upon the thread!

Really feel for you, I am in the same boat as you, but im a single parent, I only have my parents to help me, I cant work because I cant afford to, I would have to work 50 hours a week to make ends meet, so instead I have learnt how to grow veg, keep chickens and buy local meat sometimes doing some work for it. I hate collecting my benefits everyweek, I feel so bad about not working I have always worked and was the main earner. I have become a vollenter for a cancer charity, so I can give something back,
I dont know how to get out of this hole, but im just thankfull for my kids.. and as long as they are ok, then I am too.
Sending you love and best wishes xx

slowandsteady_2

declutterqueen wrote: »

Really feel for you, I am in the same boat as you, but im a single parent, I only have my parents to help me, I cant work because I cant afford to, I would have to work 50 hours a week to make ends meet, so instead I have learnt how to grow veg, keep chickens and buy local meat sometimes doing some work for it. I hate collecting my benefits everyweek, I feel so bad about not working I have always worked and was the main earner. I have become a vollenter for a cancer charity, so I can give something back,
I dont know how to get out of this hole, but im just thankfull for my kids.. and as long as they are ok, then I am too.
Sending you love and best wishes xx

Oh gosh declutterqueen, i hope i didnt cause you or others any offence in any way at all with me moaning about going jobcentre and stuff, and complaining about work and benefits, just me whinging about the system im terribly sorry if i caused you any offence, we are all fully entitled to any benefits we receive and you shouldnt feel awful for getting what is rightfully yours and your family's, just a shame sometimes it has to be made so hard for us

I admire you, i have struggled very much with having a child come into my life, especially when battling severe PND, and i genuinely cant imagine how you manage with more than one child, and on your own too! You work hell of a lot harder than those of us in full time jobs, i know that, and i only have one LO to worry about. I too wish i could keep chickens and grow stuff but despite my very frequent encouragement of dh to do something with our quite substantial garden (compared to our last place) it falls on deaf ears! Im very jealous of everyone who has the ability to grow even one thing!

And declutterqueen, you are not in a hole, you are doing the best job on earth by bringing your family up, and teaching them morales and values, and they know you are there for them 24/7, no amount of income, flash cars, flat screen tv's or posh toys can replace that. We had zilch when i was a kid (and im only 28) but my parents were always there for me no matter what, you should be really proud of yourself for having brought up your wonderful children.

We should all be proud of what we achieve despite the odds!

kingshir

Hope everyone is well and coping with the trials and tribulations that life throws at us!

I miss hearing how you are all doing:( and I hope the silence means things are going along smoothly:)

My own life has got a bit bumpy recently but I haven't been derailed yet;)

ginnyknit

Im finding things tough this week, I will probably be fine soon. Just getting a little fed up with the lack of money. I have planted lots of seeds today as a positive move. I think its just a reaction to my Mums 80th birthday, as my brother took her out and had a picnic and we couldn't afford the petrol to go down. It doesnt bother me that he spent a lot of money on a stereo for her as I know she isn't at all impressed by that kind of thing. On the other hand Dd has just be given yet more baby stuff and is having a truly MSe baby, everything has been given by her friends and Im so proud of them all for helping. Still can't help having a bad day I guess.

BitterAndTwisted

I'm with you Ginnyknit. Sometimes the key to contentment is to take pleasure in tiny things as sometimes they're the only things coming our way. I'm still basking in the glow of finding 500 gramme bags of coffee beans in my local Lidl for only £1.49 each. I cleared the shelf of all seven of them, so now I'll be able to afford to drink more than one cup a day for a wee while.

charlies-aunt

:(Not a good start to my week either ....full of cold and feeling mean and miserable.

Braving the picket lines to go into work this morning...some permanent staff are striking cos the nasty government want to peg their redundancy payments to 60K. Everyone in the real world gets a statutory maximum of 3 months pay so I don't have much sympathy for them and their demands for 80-90K...especially as I'm on fixed term and will get sweet FA when I get the push later this year :mad:.

Poor horse is still not well so had to have vet out again this weekend...so another big bill for the end of the month....

The frost over the weekend has nipped and spoiled the snowdrops in the garden bl**dy weather!! :mad:

....and don't get me started on how prices have shot up over the last couple of weeks - I could bore for Britain on that topic ! :rotfl:

Just about to wash up the tea pots .......

......and then will be nursing my cold with a big glass of hm sloe gin :rotfl: wahh-a-a-ay-y-y! ! ! things are looking better already. :T

Seriously though chaps, I do count my blessings....it may be fixed term but I do have a job.....I have a cold not a terminal disease......horse isn't 100% but looked very cheerful and content tonight.... food is getting dearer but we can afford to have a hot meal every day...etc, etc...

Life isn't perfect but is it ever?

Times are tough but I've lived through worse

....now where is that bottle of sloe gin .... :beer:

ginnyknit

I should listen to the advice I give others sometimes - I always say its the little victorys that get you through and its true. OOOh nice coffee thats a major win isn't it. I added up how much free coffee I got at the garden centre the other day - we paid a 10 pound membership to the garden club and have had 28 pounds in coffee so thats definately a bargain! Dh has just realised he is owed some expenses from his cricket league so has gone off to his meeting feeling better, with MSE magic we will stretch that money so far:j

annscullamus

I know what you mean charlies-aunt. I am just beginning a cold, and feeling quigte rotten. It always happens when I have something big about to happen like a concert or my pupils in a competition - as is happening tomorrow, so I have to leave the house mega early to get 100 miles away for a 9am start.

I was away working in the South from friday to this morning so the plane exhausts me and makes me feel grotty, I really do just want to retire! I did'nt even see my daughter and the grandchildren as she was heavily involved in her school production, so I was very sad not to at least have a couple of hours with them.

Going away to work sounds exciting, but in my field I have to travel to make enough income, and from where I live the travel expenses are high - catch 22! But the scenery and the slow way of life makes up for it.

The tiny things are good though - am completely in agreement with everyone there - mine is a hot strong cup of tea, a good stove top coffee and 2 hot water bottles in bed:lovethoug........................on my way!

I hope everyone has a good, or at least improving week. I always read a bit of Rhonda Jean at Down to Earth if I need a bit of inspiration or cheering up.

taplady

charlies-aunt! - well said!:T

a quick update from me. We made it through to the end of last month by the skin of our teeth but we got there:j all our meagre savings have now gone so we are hoping for no more emergencies or illness.
DHs van is being MOTd on friday so please cross everything you've got that it passes!
DH had a month off work but is now back:j elbow and knee still painfull but manageable. Appointment with the specialist next week.
I've done lots more cooking from scratch this month and got some great new recipes from Weezls new thread.
I've scraped the money together to buy some paint to freshen the house up and have got a week off work now to have a go at it.
Our finances will improve considerably after July when we become debt free:j just got to make it till then:D

Its nice to hear how you're all doing x