How on earth do you manage that?

Willsnarf1983

well said surfcat!!!

also that thin person may have been fat and lost the weight in the first place!

Will

calleyw

Willsnarf1983 wrote:

well said surfcat!!!

also that thin person may have been fat and lost the weight in the first place!

Will

Glad to see that you read my post properly

I believe I said "If you have never had a weight problem how can you have any idea what it is to struggle with trying to loose weight. And personally I would find that offensive."

Same for debt if you never have been in debt then how can you have any idea of how it is racked and how hard it is stuggle for it to be paid off.

So in both instances you need someone to help you through that has been in the same position.

Yours

Calley

surfcat

....and if you have never been a junkie you have no idea how hard it is to get off the stuff (heroin). A true statement I am sure, just like your statements about weight and debt. The point is that isn't it better to educate people not to get into this position in the first place? Constantly bailing people out for these scenarios (bankruptcy, bank of mum and dad) does not educate them not to repeat the mistake. Hard graft and the gradual reduction in debt by pennies each day illustrated by many on this site does.

I still reserve the right to slag someone off who's bought the latest gizmos to flash in front of everyone else then complains when they realise their debt.

rubytuesday

As the first poster said they did n't want to make the same mistakes and thats fair enough as it's very easily done.I don't think thre was any intention of being condescending or offensive!

calleyw

surfcat wrote:

....and if you have never been a junkie you have no idea how hard it is to get off the stuff (heroin). A true statement I am sure, just like your statements about weight and debt. The point is that isn't it better to educate people not to get into this position in the first place? Constantly bailing people out for these scenarios (bankruptcy, bank of mum and dad) does not educate them not to repeat the mistake. Hard graft and the gradual reduction in debt by pennies each day illustrated by many on this site does.

I still reserve the right to slag someone off who's bought the latest gizmos to flash in front of everyone else then complains when they realise their debt.

Education is wonderful thing but say for example your parents where rubbish at money how do they teach you to sensible with your money. They can't, you would either it learn it for yourself or not at all. When I was at school we had no finance lessons at all (only in my earlier 30's)

When I got my current account I was not even 100% sure of how to write a cheque

I agree that keep bailing people out does not help them. I have never had any help from my parents moneywise fullstop. Would never ask and they would not be able to help. So if I get in the brown sticky stuff it is down to me to get out of it.

But from a personal point of view I knew if I was in a lot of debt and I mean thousands (well I am have a mortgage but I don't count that, I suppose I should)if I was going to be berated for what I had spent the money I would not seek help anyway. As I know that I have been stupid and don't need it rubbed in my face again and again and again.

I do agree that the people who got in to the brown sticky stuff buying plasma tv's etc do have to take repsonsbility for there own actions. I am not denying that. But the banks/credit card companies can see what people owe. But still chuck at them like it is going out of fashion.

But I still don't agree about slagging them off. But we will agree to disagree about that.

We are becoming a consumer drive society where what you own is far more important than how you help your local community.

When I first joined in the internet in 1993 there was no of these boys toys sites selling stupid stuff that people play with once and chuck in the corner. We have moved on but not for the better is all I can say.


Yours

Calley

Willsnarf1983

calleyw wrote:

To me what you are saying is like a thin person telling a fat person how to loose weight. If you have never had a weight problem how can you have any idea what it is to struggle with trying to loose weight. And personally I would find that offensive.

my problem is that ur automatically presuming that all thin people havn't had a weight problem and this can be used the same way with debt and also people can attain an understanding on the struggles of weight/debt etc etc etc but i wud agree that they wouldn't understand fully. But i still come down on Surfcats side of this.

Will

calleyw

Willsnarf1983 wrote:

my problem is that ur automatically presuming that all thin people havn't had a weight problem and this can be used the same way with debt and also people can attain an understanding on the struggles of weight/debt etc etc etc but i wud agree that they wouldn't understand fully. But i still come down on Surfcats side of this.

Will

Please do tell me why I am assuming that. I am really interested in why you think that.

A thin person who has had a weight problem is not going to say" You are a fat moo stop stuffing your face". They are going to say "I understand how hard as I use to be as big or bigger than you etc etc"

And for a lot of people when they say they have debt people automatically jump to the conclusion that you are waster. And spent it on nights out and plasma Tv's etc.

When I had my £1500 debt it was because I was silly enough to have no savings and my cambelt went bang and I had a car accident and only third party insurance all with in 6 months. So had to pay out for the damage myself.

No car meant I could not get to work with out mega cost and inconvience. Had I not been lucky to borrow a car and cadge lifts for the week or so the car was off the road each time, so I could get to work.

So I suppose I am waster because of that. Not a plasma screen Tv in sight . I learnt my lesson and when my husbands car got written off last year we able to go and buy a new (second hand at least 5 year old) car with out resorting to credit cards, overdrafts or bank loans.

We will agree to disagree on who's side you come down on. But I don't think unless you walked in anothers shoes for a mile. You can't comment. And that is true be it debt, over weight or depression.

I don't have a problem with constuctive criticism but slagging off as Surfcat put it is another thing. And does no good. I don't expect people on this board to fawn all over the person in debt. But to give them guidance and try and point them in the right direction. But I can hardly see people coming to this board if all they are going to get called stupid for buying a plasma tv or an ipod etc etc. They know that and want help. Not to be humilated.

Now if someone is not willing to make sacrifices e.g Smoking and Sky Tv are non-negotiable then yes you have to play at being a hard head to get it through to them. They don't have a choice.

I believe we are suppose to be nice to other MSE's.


Yours

Calley

black-saturn

Credit is thrown at you. Almost every advert break includes an advert for a loan or credit card. We live in a very 'have it now' society. Gone are the days where people used to save up for years to buy what they wanted like in the days before credit cards. With credit so easily accessible it becomes too much of a temptation for some people. Luckily I've paid mine off but I know how tempting it is.

Willsnarf1983

calleyw wrote:

Please do tell me why I am assuming that. I am really interested in why you think that.

A thin person who has had a weight problem is not going to say" You are a fat moo stop stuffing your face". They are going to say "I understand how hard as I use to be as big or bigger than you etc etc"

And for a lot of people when they say they have debt people automatically jump to the conclusion that you are waster. And spent it on nights out and plasma Tv's etc.

When I had my £1500 debt it was because I was silly enough to have no savings and my cambelt went bang and I had a car accident and only third party insurance all with in 6 months. So had to pay out for the damage myself.

No car meant I could not get to work with out mega cost and inconvience. Had I not been lucky to borrow a car and cadge lifts for the week or so the car was off the road each time, so I could get to work.

So I suppose I am waster because of that. Not a plasma screen Tv in sight . I learnt my lesson and when my husbands car got written off last year we able to go and buy a new (second hand at least 5 year old) car with out resorting to credit cards, overdrafts or bank loans.

We will agree to disagree on who's side you come down on. But I don't think unless you walked in anothers shoes for a mile. You can't comment. And that is true be it debt, over weight or depression.

I don't have a problem with constuctive criticism but slagging off as Surfcat put it is another thing. And does no good. I don't expect people on this board to fawn all over the person in debt. But to give them guidance and try and point them in the right direction. But I can hardly see people coming to this board if all they are going to get called stupid for buying a plasma tv or an ipod etc etc. They know that and want help. Not to be humilated.

Now if someone is not willing to make sacrifices e.g Smoking and Sky Tv are non-negotiable then yes you have to play at being a hard head to get it through to them. They don't have a choice.

I believe we are suppose to be nice to other MSE's.


Yours

Calley

the vast majority of people that are fat are fat coz they stuffed their faces stupid, i will grant u that some people have a medical condition but i am always dubious of people that claim that. Also i suspect that the vast majority of people that are in debt is down to being frivilous (again i know not everyone) but even ur situation is still a prime example of silly spending as like u know now u shud have saved money for such an occasion.

Also anyone has every right to comment on another persons situation its whether or not they they fully understand what its about and whether or not its constructive that really matters. You can't tell me that if u saw a addicted druggy, alcoholic, gambler etc etc u wudn't make a snap judgement about them there and then! it is human nature to do that.

Also u are right u can't slag someone off but it think what the guy is trying to put across is that if u create the debt recklously (sp) and try and shirk the responisbilities then of course ur gonna get slated. and that applies for buying the latest gizmo as well


Will

---lee---

calleyw wrote:

When I got my current account I was not even 100% sure of how to write a cheque

Never fear, the FSA is so concerned about this, they have produced a helpful webpage with step by step instructions - honest:

http://www.fsa.gov.uk/consumer/02_HOW/Banking/cheque.html

Unfortunately, it does not mention what Emma had for her meal or quite how she managed to order it all by herself.