Down in the dumps today

Deep_In_Debt

I went through the lodger thing a while back. It was ok for a while - most of the lodgers were fine and pretty much kept themselves to themselves. In the end, I gave up with the lodgers as my bills increased enormously with the extra person and I couldn't keep putting the rent up to cover it. Also, I stopped getting my Council Tax discount and I struggled to pay the bills at one point.

I'm not trying to put you off, but think you need to consider all things.

I'm lucky that I live close to an airport so airport workers and air crew were always looking for accommodation.

Good luck with it.

twirlypinky

Things will get better I promise. Sometimes I think that I'm going to be stuck in !!!!!! situation forever, but then I remember what it was like when I was still married, I'm glad I'm not in that situation anymore.

If I'd managed to keep the house after my split I would definitelly have had to get a lodger (or two) as I couldn't have managed without it. As things are now, I'm living in shared accommodation - something I didn't think I could ever do, but you'd be amazed at what you can cope with when you have to.

Some days really are just going to feel rubbish - but you can get through them, it's just another day.

And you won't be alone forever either, you've only got to look at some of the munters out there that are married to see that there is someone for everyone. Your future perfect partner might not be ready quite yet, he might not have moved to your area, or he might be clearing his head after a messy break up. When it's right, it'll happen.

Hope that helps.

loopyloulou_3

thanks all! your kind comments just made me have a little cry! lol

the lodger thing worried me about bills increasing and losing the council tax thing, I never put my heating on before oct at the earliest, and am out 13 hours a day, so even in the middle of winter it only comes on for 2 hours a day, and that is when i dont light my log fire instead! So having a lodger I would imagine would mean that I would have to put the heating/hot water on for a lot more than I do now and therefore I would imagine my bills would increase. That is what worries me slightly! I live pretty frugally on my own, but cant imagine other people (my ex certainly didnt) would want to "put a jumper on" rather than turn the heating on! Mmmm food for thought it would really have to be worth its while to make me give up my space.


The point I should probably remember is that I can cope as is, and have got by (although not managed to overpay or save anything - but havent got myself ) since Nov last year with the house on my own. So I AM doing it! I should probably focus a little more on how well I have done (the household income went down by £70,000 a year overnight when my ex left) so I have done well to keep the house.
I cant help imagining the worst case scenario and trying to prepare for it, and giving myself a hard time all the time!!

My parents have been excellent, but I never would not repay them for what they paid out to my ex/my debt but they are my buffer, if I was ever in trouble I know they would help, but thats my last resort.

I am giving up watching the news (it is always conflicting anyways!) as I always listen to the worst of the worst and stress myself out, then dont sleep properly and get in a state. Which doesnt help at all!

I think its just the feeling of things being out of control - specially with the cost of so many things going up - that worries me!

cady

dont listen to the news its evil!!!!

Me and my boyf bought a flat in nov 07 and since the day we exchanged everything has gone up the econimy is crashing blah blah blah i work day to day month to month to survive we pay the essenials then pay as much as we can else where make up clothes nights out what are these???? lol you will get through it and will have a great home and be debt free .... it doesnt happen over night and it requires hard work (trust me) but im sure it will be worth it in the end....... people keep saying how will we cope getting another mortgage were with NR in neg equity and have low wages but what is the other options??? loose the house we worked so hard to get ??? you will be fine and with all the suport and advice on here (these guys are brill ) you will get by !!!! dont stress as it does no good!!

Cady x