Dumped with the debt !!

brncptn

Hi all, I'm a Newbie so please be gentle and I would be grateful for any advice!:o. My Girlfriend and I have split up fairly amicably 3 months ago but agreed to stay together until we could sell the house and pay off most of our 59K credit card Debts (OUCH!, I know it's massive). Prior to this I would say we had problem debts but could still relativley comfortably meet the £1300 pcm min. repayments. We have the house up for sale and there is around 35K equity. We had agreed to split the remaining 24K between us on a 60:40% split between Me:Her. I had arranged a remortgage to do this when she suddenly turned around and announced she will leave in a few weeks time for a new flat and take no responsibility for any of the Debt!:mad:. The problem is that muggings here has it all in his name as she had previous credit problems following the breakup of her 1st marriage. I'm now plunged head first from problem debts into serious debt crisis as I can't meet the credit card payments. I've been in touch with National Debtline who are assisting me but just thought I would ask if anyone else who may have faced a similar predicament had any advice to offer. At present I would have around £350pcm after priority payments so am maybe considering an IVA or debt repayment Plan. If it's a debt repayment plan then I'm not sure whether to do this myself or use one of the Companies like National Debtline or CCCC to administer on my behalf. I'm completely stressed out by the whole situation! I've never been in a situation like this before and never missed a payment on anything. Thanks for taking the time to read this long post and I would be grateful for and advice on any aspect of the above.

blackclouds

Sorry to hear of that mate, can't give you any practical advice but when I came out my marriage I had £16k of debt (that I didnt know about until just before split as I worked away and didnt get to open post) on salary of £20k and I managed to get myself out of it by plugging away, making some money on a flat I had kept while married and support from family.

Unfortunately now back in debt but at least it was my doing this time. In future keep yourself right and good luck getting it sorted out ......

Merlot

welcome to the board.

You need legal advice on this, try the CAB, I wouldn't be giving her any equity from the flat, whos name is the flat in? Have you have any viewings? Is any of the debt secured?

Could you post an SOA (incomings and outgoings) and a list of the debt, it makes it easier for us to assist you.

In the meantime, call the CCCS, they are fantastic.

We don't judge on this board, but I'm going to make an exception, your ex girlfriends behaviour is awful, I could never do that and live with myself, she gives us women a bad name...sorry rant over.

Merlot.x.

GeorgeUK

Totally agree with the above.

The SOA calculator should total everything up for you and possibly list some things you may not have thought of.
http://www.makesenseofcards.com/soacalc.html

If you cannot get any new 0% cards, you may be able to shuffle your current credit card balances to clear one and possibly get a 0% or low interest life of balance offer on it.

I would definately contact CCCS or Payplan to see if a DMP is required or advised. I would hold off on looking at an IVA. Either way, make sure you go through one of the free debt charities to do this rather than pay a company to do exactly the same.

memebaby

im a solicitor and may have some advice. first things first, how do you own the flat is it as joint tenants or tenants in common. if its joint tenants she is not entitled on the face of it to any 60/40 split and at the very most 50/50 but i would refuse to sell and use this as a bargaining tool. if you are joint tenants and have a trust deed confirmong 60/40 split you may be in more problems. Post me back and i can advise you better. Obviously it depends on how you feel about your ex and whether you want to get a bit mean and tough with her but for what its worht with how shes behaving towards you you may need to start putting yourself first and get tough. anyway ill wait to hear from you and then post back some more options for you.
susan

memebaby

silly me, have just read post again and you said 60/40 to you. its still relevant how you own the flat though so let me know x

brncptn

Thanks you you all who have advised me so far and supported me and sorry for the delay in replying. It's amazing how many of us are in this awful situation and inspired by how supportive everyone is in this forum.

memebaby - sorry, should have said the property I have is a House and it is in my sole name, as is the mortgage and the debt (unfortunatley!).
The main thrust of OH's argument is that as I will have all of the equity in the house and most of the contents, this equates to her share (or even more) of the debt. Where the OH is being selfish is that she doesn't realise that the assets are tied up until the property is sold. When she walks away at the end of the month, I'm left with escalating debts which I can't afford to pay.
I'm getting back in touch with CCCS re: the best solution IVA v's DMP. As said earlier I have 30-35K in equity and expect a windfall of another 20K (early inhertitance) once my mother has sold a property too. This will nearly pay off all my debt so long the intersest is frozen when the DWP or IVA kick in.
I'm favouring the DMP option, but in either case my concern if that if my sell my house I won't be able to rent a property afterwards as my credit record will be blemished by the DMP.

Agian, very grateful for any thoughts or advice

RAS

Hi

In the current market, the idea that OH share of the debt is covered by equity is a non starter. The market is going down and she is not taking into account the full cost of the payments after interest is added.

have you offered her part of the equity in exchange for the debt payments?

And in the short-term, can you take a lodger to help the finances - the income is tax free.

bargainbetty

Just a very quick point, but you say the debt is largely in credit card form? Does she still have any of the cards? If so, I would contact all the companies involved and get those cards frozen immediately so she cannot add any further debt.

I would also get copies of the statements detailing all her expenditure since you decided to split, and consider taking her to the small claims court for any non-household items she may have purchased since then if she doesn't pay that off. If the cards are solely in your name, you can cut them off without a problem.

I would also ensure that you are in the house when she departs, and make damn sure that the TV, stereo etc remain in situ (your card, your possession). As soon as she is gone, get the locks changed.

Seriously, not all of us women are like her. My ex and I divorced so amicably we shared a solicitor, becasue we saw no need to pay for one each and fight about things.

Good luck sweetheart x