Mother-in-law thinks I'm on the dole!

globalds

stebiz wrote: »

No I don't claim, Dole, Housing Benefit, Sickness or anything like that. I get a little bit of child tax credit which helps towards nursey fees but anybody with a toddler over 3 gets tht.

Stebiz

That's cool ....You know your telling the truth ...If it were me I would seek as many opportunities to wind her up as are possible.(As long as the misses is OK about it)
Can't you get some benefits leaflets to leave somewhere she will see them.

POSSETTE

globalds wrote: »

That's cool ....You know your telling the truth ...If it were me I would seek as many opportunities to wind her up as are possible.(As long as the misses is OK about it)
Can't you get some benefits leaflets to leave somewhere she will see them.

like it.....:rotfl: :T

or...have you got enough that you can give them something so your MIL DOESNT have to go out cleaning at her age??

stebiz

POSSETTE wrote: »

like it.....:rotfl: :T

or...have you got enough that you can give them something so your MIL DOESNT have to go out cleaning at her age??

Sadly I haven't. I have 3 young children. One goes to private nursery. The others are at School age and anybody who are parents know how expensive that can be.

Stebiz

Slapps

POSSETTE wrote: »

like it.....:rotfl: :T

or...have you got enough that you can give them something so your MIL DOESNT have to go out cleaning at her age??

it's a shame you haven't got the money to employ her to do all your cleaning lol

wigglebeena

I would be coming out with, 'When you're as rich as me work is beneath you,' and 'I'd listen to what you're saying but I'm too busy lighting cigs with twenty quid notes.' Just for the fun of seeing her head explode.

wigglebeena

More constructively, if you're an internet whiz, are there any things you could coach her on regarding setting up as self-employed herself? Is she e.g. really good at knitting, if she could produce her own patterns she could get a sideline going on etsy.com (without even having to knit). Or does she have knowledge of or contacts for any useful item she could be flogging on the 'Bay (or the DARK SIDE as we Ebidders call it, in forbidding tones).

Maybe if she had more money coming in she would be less bitter.

ClareEmily

My mum only knows how well my hubby is doing at work through me (he is a taxi Driver) and sometimes when he is having a bad month I lie and say he is doing ok, as otherwise she worries and starts telling him that maybe he should be working more hours.

I am 31 and my hubby is 39 BTW.

So maybe your MIL is getting her info from comments your wife makes, you need your wife to talk to her.

Reds-on-Sea

Why don't you politely ask her about it? If you think she'll give you a straight answer - she might genuinely be mistaken.

Prepare yourself in advance and get yourself in the right frame of mind so that you don't get into a slanging match. Next time she does it, just ask her why she thinks these things, and on what basis. Explain to her that working 9-5 doesn't suit you, but that doesn't mean you don't work hard.

If she comes out with personal insults, make sure you don't reply with insults about her (trust me, you will come out looking the bad guy, by the sounds of her!) just give her the facts and how the things that she says hurt you and are just untrue, but all in a calm reasonable manner.

if that fails, leve her to it!

p.s. I love the idea of giving her a hand out though, so a woman of her age doesn't have to go round scrubbing floors!

Purple_Sparkles

My family are jealous of me, they seem to think I've somehow got loads of cash but don't go to work. They are so wrong but I leave them to it, I can't be bothered with their stupid comments.

I like my life, I earn enough working from home to enable my son and I to have nice things but most of the things I do buy are from car boot sale, jumble sales or charity shops - my family wouldn't be seen dead buying anything if it wasn't brand new.

I'm not rich, but I do live within my means, I'd tell her to go to hell - enjoy your life and don't let her narrow mind spoil it for you and your family.

Optimisticpair

stebiz wrote: »

That would make me squirm. It would be like rubbing her nose in it. I'd hate to make matters worse. Although I think most of your points are quite accurate and others would certainly agree with your advice.

Stebiz

Cheers.

Could you talk it over with your wife, have a rehearsal of what you will say and how you will say it so that a) it feels less cringeworthy and b) doesn't sound like you are rubbing her nose in it. You would just be giving her correct information instead of allowing her her to go on making a wrong assumption.

The goal is surely for your MIL to learn of, appreciate and be proud of your abilities. What you earn isn't really any of her business but the fact that you do earn enough to make your family happy is the important point to her it seems. I wish you sucess.