Time to break free!

rubydoiwannabee

savingholmes wrote: »

Thanks - I will talk to him about - I think he would be quite pleased. Just didn't want anyone to think we were neglecting him. I'll ring the afterschool club and knock off Fridays and if that is going okay review again then. That will save me £28 just there a month.

It is a big decision, but it will probably make him feel very grown up!! It started for us because DS was doing tennis coaching after school 2 days, so it seemed silly to not let him come home on the others. Like you I pay for DD at ASclub for 3 days a week now but she is only 5!!! I have stopped claiming vouchers as well from employer since i stopped nursery payments, must look again at those for after school club.

It is amazing how savings can be made when you really question everything.
keep going.

savingholmes

splishsplash wrote: »

If you put your contribution plus what you're paying the cleaner towards debt, then you'll be able to clear the MS debt the first month, the E debt the second month, and the BC debt a couple of months after that - and before you know it, the bh debt would be knocked on the head. That would certainly make the list shorter!

There are some great Flylady threads running on the OldStyle Boards which can help hugely to focus in on the dreaded housework... might be worth having a peek?

I will have a peek at the old style boards and see what they suggest.... I know I need to do that to get my grocery bill down too. I've already cut out the £90 in school meals I was paying last term....:eek:

Part of my debts is due to being a rescuer - it's a good job that this board is anonymous I would probably want to ride in and rescue some of the posters even if it put me in a worse position. I have certainly traditionally done that!

My "contribution" as you put it goes to a church but I know they will struggle to fund things without my money but I am very slowly coming to the conclusion that a) that might not be my problem and b) that if God is as big as I think he is he can find a way round that which doesn't involve me. I think it is partly a pride thing and I don't want anyone to think I'm offended with them and that's why I'm not paying it any more. At the same time I don't want to tell them about my debts in case they think less of me... I know also that logically I wouldn't necessarily judge someone for being in debt and that if I did it would be my problem not theirs but it is so ingrained it it hard to break....:o I've tithed most of my life since being a kid - hard to stop now....

savingholmes

I know I posted this late last night.... so wondered whether any of you early birds had any more thoughts for me!

Milly1974

savingholmes wrote: »

Statement of Affairs and Personal Balance Sheet

Monthly Income Details
Monthly income after tax................ 1914
Partners monthly income after tax....... 1617
Benefits................................ 125
Other income............................ 0
Total monthly income.................... 3656

Monthly Expense Details
Mortgage................................ 753
Secured loan repayments................. 0
Rent.................................... 0
Management charge (leasehold property).. 0
Council tax............................. 138
Electricity............................. 70 I could be wrong, but this seems high combined with Gas.
Gas..................................... 40
Oil..................................... 0
Water rates............................. 23
Telephone (land line)................... 28
Mobile phone............................ 25
TV Licence.............................. 11
Satellite/Cable TV...................... 0
Internet Services....................... 19 You are paying £72 a month on phones and internet. Can you change to a bundle deal of some sort and cut the use of the mobile/switch to PAYG
Groceries etc. ......................... 360 I think you have already mentioned that you want to trim this
Clothing................................ 25
Petrol/diesel........................... 400
Road tax................................ 40
Car Insurance........................... 60
Car maintenance (including MOT)......... 170
Car parking............................. 2
Other travel............................ 0
Childcare/nursery....................... 110
Other child related expenses............ 25
Medical (prescriptions, dentist etc).... 16 Are you using the pre-paid thingy that makes prescriptions cheaper? (don't know much about it myself!)
Pet insurance/vet bills................. 0
Buildings insurance..................... 12
Contents insurance...................... 12
Life assurance ......................... 70
Other insurance......................... 33
Presents (birthday, christmas etc)...... 30
Haircuts................................ 25
Entertainment........................... 40
Holiday................................. 50
Emergency fund.......................... 0
Child sponsorship 2..................... 18
Child sponsorship 1..................... 18
Charitable giving me.................... 180
Charitable giving 0H.................... 175
Cleaner 90
Total monthly expenses.................. 3068

Assets
Cash.................................... 1300
House value (Gross)..................... 200000
Shares and bonds........................ 0
Car(s).................................. 3300
Other assets............................ 0
Total Assets............................ 204600

Secured Debts
Description....................Debt......Monthly...APR
Mortgage...................... 151000...(753)......5.95
Total secured debts........... 151000....-.........-

Unsecured Debts
Description....................Debt......Monthly...APR
C12............................7168......100.......0
E..............................300.......10........18
V..............................10500.....25........0
bh.............................960.......40........0
C1.............................1262......10........0
BC.............................500.......10........6.5
MS.............................250.......5.........18
Total unsecured debts..........20940.....200.......-

Monthly Budget Summary
Total monthly income.................... 3,656
Expenses (including secured debts)....... 3068
Available for debt repayments........... 588
Monthly UNsecured debt repayments....... 200
Surplus(deficit if negative)............ 388

Personal Balance Sheet Summary
Total assets (things you own)........... 204,600
Total Secured debt...................... -151,000
Total Unsecured debt.................... -20,940
Net Assets.............................. 32,660

Created using the SOA calculator at www.makesenseofcards.com.
Reproduced on Moneysavingexpert with permission.

2 adults, 2 children. 2 cars old and 1 motorbike very old hence high maintenance costs

I am not all that good with SOAs, but hopefully I might have been able to point you in the right direction along with other comments that have been made.

I understand your arguement about the charity donations, but from the sounds of it, at the moment you are borrowing money in order to give it to charity in order for your OH to work for charity and earn it back. Have I missed the point here?

Cut out your charity money, and combined with the £200 you already pay to your debts, it could all be clear in just over three years. You can more than make it back up after that when you DO have disposable income. Perhaps to ease your conscience, try doing a sponsered event each year instead. Organise a fair or something at the church, or run a fun run.

Milly x

savingholmes

OH has a mobile - pay as you go - spend between £4 and £10 per month
I have a mobile spend between £5 and £15 per month - pay as you go. Tends to be higher if I am looking for a job but not too bad rest of time.

BT and Internet £28 and £19 I am interested in looking at making some savings but OH says we use 10 GIG on web downloads per month (I think a lot of this is him on-line gaming) he can't see how we can cut it!!!!

annamc75

Statement of Affairs and Personal Balance Sheet

Monthly Income Details
Monthly income after tax................ 1914
Partners monthly income after tax....... 1617
Benefits................................ 125
Other income............................ 0
Total monthly income.................... 3656

Monthly Expense Details
Mortgage................................ 753
Secured loan repayments................. 0
Rent.................................... 0
Management charge (leasehold property).. 0
Council tax............................. 138
Electricity............................. 70
Gas..................................... 40
Oil..................................... 0
Water rates............................. 23
Telephone (land line)................... 28
Mobile phone............................ 25
TV Licence.............................. 11
Satellite/Cable TV...................... 0
Internet Services....................... 19
Groceries etc. ......................... 360
Clothing................................ 25
Petrol/diesel........................... 400 (this seems a huge amount? Is there no public transport etc that would bring this down)
Road tax................................ 40
Car Insurance........................... 60
Car maintenance (including MOT)......... 170
Car parking............................. 2
Other travel............................ 0
Childcare/nursery....................... 110
Other child related expenses............ 25
Medical (prescriptions, dentist etc).... 16
Pet insurance/vet bills................. 0
Buildings insurance..................... 12
Contents insurance...................... 12
Life assurance ......................... 70
Other insurance......................... 33 (what is this?)
Presents (birthday, christmas etc)...... 30
Haircuts................................ 25
Entertainment........................... 40
Holiday................................. 50 (between holiday, entertainment, hair cuts, presents and clothing you are spending over £150 - is all of this really necessary?)
Emergency fund.......................... 0
Child sponsorship 2..................... 18
Child sponsorship 1..................... 18
Charitable giving me.................... 180
Charitable giving 0H.................... 175 (Charity begins at home)
Cleaner 90 (You really just need to learn to pick up as you go along - once you get into the habit you will be glad you did)
Total monthly expenses.................. 3068

Assets
Cash.................................... 1300
House value (Gross)..................... 200000
Shares and bonds........................ 0
Car(s).................................. 3300
Other assets............................ 0
Total Assets............................ 204600

Secured Debts
Description....................Debt......Monthly...APR
Mortgage...................... 151000...(753)......5.95
Total secured debts........... 151000....-.........-

Unsecured Debts
Description....................Debt......Monthly...APR
C12............................7168......100.......0
E..............................300.......10........18
V..............................10500.....25........0
bh.............................960.......40........0
C1.............................1262......10........0
BC.............................500.......10........6.5
MS.............................250.......5.........18
Total unsecured debts..........20940.....200.......-

Monthly Budget Summary
Total monthly income.................... 3,656
Expenses (including secured debts)....... 3068
Available for debt repayments........... 588
Monthly UNsecured debt repayments....... 200
Surplus(deficit if negative)............ 388

Personal Balance Sheet Summary
Total assets (things you own)........... 204,600
Total Secured debt...................... -151,000
Total Unsecured debt.................... -20,940
Net Assets.............................. 32,660

I can understand why you would want to keep the cleaner, the holidays, the charitable giving etc but you have to remember that the lifestyle you have right now is why you are spending more than is coming into the house. If there is no real job security then your priority must be to get rid of the debt and the excessive lifestyle before real problems occur. As it stands cuttting the budget and tightening the belt is realistic and should be your objective. If you don't and the debt problem gets worse there will be no money for charity and certainly no money for cleaner and hols etc. Your plans for big expensive parties and wedding will not happen without sacrifice now.


Good luck and let us know how you are doing!

Ax

savingholmes

Other insurance £33 is mortgage protection insurance on me - I have used it in the past

The holidays - once this one next weekend is out of the way can go for now £50

Presents £50 - I am active on the finished basket thread and think due to past shopping I can get through most of Christmas without new spend. I have £50 in Game vouchers I can use for DS but his birthday is very soon after Christmas too and will need to buy a main present for DD but have wraps up in already. Bigger challenge is nephews who I normally spend approx £60 on (2xChristmas, 1 Birthday in next 4 months) - they have everything so I normally give them money....

I'm trying to earn Amazon vouchers so can potentially use these towards Christmas, already used a £10 voucher for a birthday and a £25 M&S voucher earned through MSE activity....

Quietgirl

A suggestion with regards to the donations to charity. Why not stop them until you have your debts sorted out, but keep a record each month of how much you would have given, total it after you've paid off your debts, and then treat what you would have given as another debt and repay that each month as you would be in a better position to do that after paying off your debts.

Not wanting to get into an ethical debate, BUT what religion or church would want to see a family experiencing financial hardship in order to fund them?

savingholmes

Quietgirl wrote: »

A suggestion with regards to the donations to charity. Why not stop them until you have your debts sorted out, but keep a record each month of how much you would have given, total it after you've paid off your debts, and then treat what you would have given as another debt and repay that each month as you would be in a better position to do that after paying off your debts.

Not wanting to get into an ethical debate, BUT what religion or church would want to see a family experiencing financial hardship in order to fund them?

I am trying to motivate myself to stop but goes against a lifetime of teaching on the subject.... I think I may go and talk to the finance person before I stop my giving and potentially give them a month's notice so that if it does cause them problems they can find another solution....

Stardust77

Hi,

I'm also not much use at SOA's but have recently became debt free having paid off a fair whack of debt over 3 years on about half of your income so I wanted to reassure you it can be done.

The main thing that strikes me is whether your OH is committed to being debt-free as well? I think it can really make or break a plan and if he's not onboard you'll find it so much harder to remain focused.

Even with the best intentions, you have to be committed to a change in lifestyle and possibly compromising ethics if you really want to clear your debt. This might mean making more of an effort with the housework, stopping or at least vastly reducing your charitable donations or considering alternatives to your ds's after school club. I can only say what I'd do in the circumstances and fully accept this wouldn't be suitable for everyone but I'd sooner make sure my son was well cared for after school and reduce my charitable giving by the £7 a week then the other way round.

I think Milly's suggestion was a fab idea for you and your family. Could you possibly arrange a big fundraiser each year or even several time a year? I do fundraising for charity and have raised about £10k over the past 3 years for a charity close to my heart. Would this be an option for you? It's something in which you can involve your family and community in too. Although I'm not religious the church in my road is always doing fairs and fetes and treasure hunts and things that are aimed at the kids which involves lots of people and loads of people go along regardless of belief so you could make huge amounts of money for your church.