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  • FIRST POST
    • SamsReturn
    • By SamsReturn 14th Sep 17, 10:31 AM
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    SamsReturn
    Is it more romantic to be living apart ?
    • #1
    • 14th Sep 17, 10:31 AM
    Is it more romantic to be living apart ? 14th Sep 17 at 10:31 AM
    Women are more than twice as likely as men to lack interest in sex when living with a partner, a study of British sexual attitudes suggests.
    It found that while men and women lost passion with age, women were often left cold by longer relationships.
    Overall, poor health and a lack of emotional closeness affected both men's and women's desire for sex.
    http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-41230891
    I don't know what to say about that story, 'cos i'm not a woman and i'm not in a longterm relationship. And i do fall asleep in front of the telly these day.
    Would anyone like to comment ?
Page 1
    • caprikid1
    • By caprikid1 14th Sep 17, 11:31 AM
    • 473 Posts
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    caprikid1
    • #2
    • 14th Sep 17, 11:31 AM
    • #2
    • 14th Sep 17, 11:31 AM
    I think there is a certain amount of not taking each other for granted when not living together.


    I like to shower , iron a shirt etc before visiting my GF after work. I send a romantic text when I get up etc.


    In my case I do both, I have children Week on Week off so weeks with the kids we hardly see each other.
    Last edited by caprikid1; 14-09-2017 at 1:26 PM.
    • alwaysskint96
    • By alwaysskint96 14th Sep 17, 11:52 AM
    • 877 Posts
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    alwaysskint96
    • #3
    • 14th Sep 17, 11:52 AM
    • #3
    • 14th Sep 17, 11:52 AM
    I live 2 mins walk away from my OH. It works well- when we want to see each other it is easy and when we want a bit of space ( thats usually me- he was married for 30 years so copes better with someone always around) we can just spent time in our own houses

    Means we dont have to deal with things like others bad moods too often and no arguments about housework bills etc
    • trailingspouse
    • By trailingspouse 14th Sep 17, 12:06 PM
    • 2,360 Posts
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    trailingspouse
    • #4
    • 14th Sep 17, 12:06 PM
    • #4
    • 14th Sep 17, 12:06 PM
    I think what is more likely to kill the passion for a woman is not so much the living with someone as the living with someone who thinks she's there to do all the housework/kidwork and still be a sex kitten at bedtime.

    Wooing starts when you clear the breakfast things away...
    • Carl31
    • By Carl31 14th Sep 17, 12:14 PM
    • 2,017 Posts
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    Carl31
    • #5
    • 14th Sep 17, 12:14 PM
    • #5
    • 14th Sep 17, 12:14 PM
    I think Ladies can give or take sex more than men can. I think we both enjoy it, but men have a more consistent biological urge, hence its more of a priority. Ladies do it as more of a romantic/emotional thing, or to have a baby. As the romance dies off over time, so does the sex, but the male urge takes longer to die off
    • Arshad 00
    • By Arshad 00 14th Sep 17, 12:20 PM
    • 422 Posts
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    Arshad 00
    • #6
    • 14th Sep 17, 12:20 PM
    • #6
    • 14th Sep 17, 12:20 PM
    I think Ladies can give or take sex more than men can. I think we both enjoy it, but men have a more consistent biological urge, hence its more of a priority. Ladies do it as more of a romantic/emotional thing, or to have a baby. As the romance dies off over time, so does the sex, but the male urge takes longer to die off
    Originally posted by Carl31
    How much longer?

    Twenty years and counting..............
    • tommix
    • By tommix 14th Sep 17, 12:28 PM
    • 35,617 Posts
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    tommix
    • #7
    • 14th Sep 17, 12:28 PM
    • #7
    • 14th Sep 17, 12:28 PM
    I don't know about more romantic but certainly more enduring.

    Relationships with women that I have lived with, tend to last no more than a few weeks. However my current relationship with 'Shiela' who lives in Australia has lasted for over 20 years.

    We're still very close even though she lives 10,000 miles away.
    • Judi
    • By Judi 14th Sep 17, 12:43 PM
    • 15,263 Posts
    • 62,548 Thanks
    Judi
    • #8
    • 14th Sep 17, 12:43 PM
    • #8
    • 14th Sep 17, 12:43 PM
    Is it more romantic to be living apart ?
    It depends on whether its a matter of out of sight out of mind or absence makes the heart grow fonder.

    Its all down to how much your missed/appreciated.
    'Holy crap on a cracker!'
    • EachPenny
    • By EachPenny 14th Sep 17, 1:00 PM
    • 2,815 Posts
    • 5,026 Thanks
    EachPenny
    • #9
    • 14th Sep 17, 1:00 PM
    • #9
    • 14th Sep 17, 1:00 PM
    Wooing starts when you clear the breakfast things away...
    Originally posted by trailingspouse
    Sounds a bit late in the day in my experience. It should really be gently waking her with her favourite breakfast prepared and served in bed, with a hot bath running, and having already put the laundry on, silently hoovered the house, and got the kids ready for school
    "In the future, everyone will be rich for 15 minutes"
    • PasturesNew
    • By PasturesNew 14th Sep 17, 1:01 PM
    • 60,668 Posts
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    PasturesNew
    There's probably a biological reason that says if you live with them you're more likely to know where they are/where they've been ... so less chance that they've been dipping it elsewhere... so less need to give out the goodies.
    • Judi
    • By Judi 14th Sep 17, 1:02 PM
    • 15,263 Posts
    • 62,548 Thanks
    Judi
    Sounds a bit late in the day in my experience. It should really be gently waking her with her favourite breakfast prepared and served in bed, with a hot bath running, and having already put the laundry on, silently hoovered the house, and got the kids ready for school
    Originally posted by EachPenny
    An an open declaration of his love for me will do me.
    'Holy crap on a cracker!'
    • lincroft1710
    • By lincroft1710 14th Sep 17, 8:00 PM
    • 9,892 Posts
    • 7,948 Thanks
    lincroft1710
    Sounds a bit late in the day in my experience. It should really be gently waking her with her favourite breakfast prepared and served in bed, with a hot bath running, and having already put the laundry on, silently hoovered the house, and got the kids ready for school
    Originally posted by EachPenny
    Joke post of the month!

    "Silently Hoovered the house"!!!! Please tell me where you can buy a "silent" Hoover.
    • Spendingqueen
    • By Spendingqueen 14th Sep 17, 8:15 PM
    • 71 Posts
    • 10 Thanks
    Spendingqueen
    Too many factors missing
    - Mens performance in bed / Men's making partner feel sexy and wanted, actually turning her on and not wanting to just go straight into the 'Sex' part
    -Women seem to have children and forget to show their affection for the partner or make an effort for them as they are so busy with the kids etc (I have 4 but still make time for OH) - No wonder many men have affairs when they don't feel loved and wanted.

    -The expectations of some people still living in the 50's - If one works and the other doesn't that one should do housework, and visa versa. If both work share chores appropriately - A list I find helps men remember what they need to do.

    I suppose there is the comfort eating factor that goes with living together in a long term relationship.
    • Pyxis
    • By Pyxis 14th Sep 17, 8:22 PM
    • 30,294 Posts
    • 111,444 Thanks
    Pyxis
    Sounds a bit late in the day in my experience. It should really be gently waking her with her favourite breakfast prepared and served in bed, with a hot bath running, and having already put the laundry on, silently hoovered the house, and got the kids ready for school
    Originally posted by EachPenny
    If you're a man and that's what you do, will you marry me?
    (I just lurve spiders! )
    INFJ(Turbulent).

    Her Greenliness Baroness Pyxis of the Alphabetty, Pinnacle of Peadom
    Founder Member: WIMPS ANONYMOUS
    • onlyroz
    • By onlyroz 14th Sep 17, 9:46 PM
    • 13,573 Posts
    • 25,830 Thanks
    onlyroz
    Sounds a bit late in the day in my experience. It should really be gently waking her with her favourite breakfast prepared and served in bed, with a hot bath running, and having already put the laundry on, silently hoovered the house, and got the kids ready for school
    Originally posted by EachPenny
    If any man showed the slightest inkling of doing that for me, I'd run off with them like a shot.
    • onlyroz
    • By onlyroz 14th Sep 17, 9:48 PM
    • 13,573 Posts
    • 25,830 Thanks
    onlyroz
    Can't speak for everyone, but when I finally crawl into bed after having done a full day at work, done all the cooking and housework, got the kids through their homework and night-time routine, sex is usually the last thing on my mind. I'm far more receptive on a weekend morning after I finally manage to have a bit of a lie-in.

    And yes, it doesn't help when your other half is a bit of a slob who would only consider using the hoover when the carpet starts to crunch under your feet, and who seems to think that the laundry does itself.
    • onomatopoeia99
    • By onomatopoeia99 14th Sep 17, 10:23 PM
    • 3,516 Posts
    • 7,724 Thanks
    onomatopoeia99
    I suppose there is the comfort eating factor that goes with living together in a long term relationship.
    Originally posted by Spendingqueen
    What's that then? I didn't comfort eat when living with my ex and my weight stayed the same.
    INTP, nerd, libertarian and scifi geek.
    Home is where my books are.
    • phillw
    • By phillw 14th Sep 17, 10:58 PM
    • 912 Posts
    • 544 Thanks
    phillw
    I think what is more likely to kill the passion for a woman is not so much the living with someone as the living with someone who thinks she's there to do all the housework/kidwork and still be a sex kitten at bedtime.

    Wooing starts when you clear the breakfast things away...
    Originally posted by trailingspouse
    That might be what you think you want, but studies have shown that women lose interest the more a man helps round the house. But then maybe an androgynous slave is what you want?

    And yes, it doesn't help when your other half is a bit of a slob who would only consider using the hoover when the carpet starts to crunch under your feet, and who seems to think that the laundry does itself.
    Originally posted by onlyroz
    Sure, but if he changed then you'd see his other flaws & then you'd realise that he's not exactly manly doing all that house work.
    Last edited by phillw; 14-09-2017 at 11:00 PM.
    • Pyxis
    • By Pyxis 15th Sep 17, 7:31 AM
    • 30,294 Posts
    • 111,444 Thanks
    Pyxis
    If any man showed the slightest inkling of doing that for me, I'd run off with them like a shot.
    Originally posted by onlyroz
    You'd have to get through me first!

    D'ja want some? Eh? D'ja want some?
    (I just lurve spiders! )
    INFJ(Turbulent).

    Her Greenliness Baroness Pyxis of the Alphabetty, Pinnacle of Peadom
    Founder Member: WIMPS ANONYMOUS
    • Pyxis
    • By Pyxis 15th Sep 17, 7:34 AM
    • 30,294 Posts
    • 111,444 Thanks
    Pyxis

    Sure, but if he changed then you'd see his other flaws & then you'd realise that he's not exactly manly doing all that house work.
    Originally posted by phillw
    Are you for real?
    Please, please say you forgot to put a smiley there?

    And please define 'manly'.
    (I just lurve spiders! )
    INFJ(Turbulent).

    Her Greenliness Baroness Pyxis of the Alphabetty, Pinnacle of Peadom
    Founder Member: WIMPS ANONYMOUS
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