How to find someone in Ireland?

chelseablue
chelseablue Posts: 3,303 Forumite
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in Marriage, relationships & families
After nearly 35 years of thinking my father was unknown, at the weekend I found out that my family have known who is my whole life.

Shocked is understatement!

My question is; all I have his is name (and it is a very common name in Ireland!) Is there anyway of finding him after all these years?

No date of birth or anything

Would be really devastated if I never got the chance to meet him
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Comments

  • savalittle.
    savalittle. Posts: 32 Forumite
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    edited 5 September 2017 at 10:57AM
    Could you apply to ITV long lost family? or message all "Joe Bloggs" on Facebook if you use that.
  • Mojisola
    Mojisola Posts: 35,557 Forumite
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    https://www.salvationarmy.org.uk/about-reuniting-families

    This service has a good success rate - although they will only pass on details if your father wants to make contact with you.
  • chelseablue
    chelseablue Posts: 3,303 Forumite
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    Mojisola wrote: »
    www.salvationarmy.org.uk/about-reuniting-families

    This service has a good success rate - although they will only pass on details if your father wants to make contact with you.

    Thank you very much. Just had a look at their criteria and it says I would need to know the following:


    Their age or date of birth (If the person sought was born outside of England, Wales or Scotland, the full date of birth is required.)

    The name of at least one of their parents.

    Their last known whereabouts. Where the person is known to be overseas, the full last known address will be needed.


    [FONT=Trebuchet MS,Trebuchet MS][FONT=Trebuchet MS,Trebuchet MS]Failure to provide any of these details could mean we will have to decline your request.

    Unfortunately I don't have any of that :(
    [/FONT]

    [/FONT]
  • PasturesNew
    PasturesNew Posts: 70,698 Forumite
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    Who told you? Can you pump them for more information?
    Northern Ireland? Southern Ireland? Any town names... any job clues?

    The more snippets you can find, the easier your starting point might be.

    You can't just have a name.... because, as you know, many people have the same name.

    The more you can find out about age, job, location, anything, the better your chance of searching.

    There are websites where you can publish a "looking for" advert, although you must expect to put it out there and maybe hear nothing for 5-6 years until somebody randomly discovers it and knows something.

    DNA testing is another round-about way of doing it too. Genealogy websites such as Ancestry give a variety of DNA tests, which end up linking you with "possible people" who have also taken the tests and have family trees online.

    How that works is you might discover a "possible cousin" who turns out to be your father's brother's daughter doing the family tree .... so once you have a "match" you then need to find out how you could be related. This isn't simple because you might not get a match on his side for awhile, until somebody else with the same gene markers also has one done. But people have been known to find their dads this way from "He was an American soldier in WW2".

    How much money you want to throw at it will also depend on the route/s you take.
  • chelseablue
    chelseablue Posts: 3,303 Forumite
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    My cousin told me, she was 16 when I was born. He was born in Southern Ireland, Wexford.
    He came over to England in the 1960's I think but my cousin said he has since moved back to Ireland


    My Uncle (my cousins Dad) was really good friends with him, I think they came over to England together.
    But my Uncle died in 1997 so cant ask him anything
  • Mojisola
    Mojisola Posts: 35,557 Forumite
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    chelseablue wrote: »
    After nearly 35 years of thinking my father was unknown, at the weekend I found out that my family have known who is my whole life.
    chelseablue wrote: »
    Thank you very much. Just had a look at their criteria and it says I would need to know the following:


    Their age or date of birth (If the person sought was born outside of England, Wales or Scotland, the full date of birth is required.)

    The name of at least one of their parents.

    Their last known whereabouts. Where the person is known to be overseas, the full last known address will be needed.


    [FONT=Trebuchet MS,Trebuchet MS][FONT=Trebuchet MS,Trebuchet MS]Failure to provide any of these details could mean we will have to decline your request.

    Unfortunately I don't have any of that :(
    [/FONT]

    [/FONT]


    The people who know his name probably know at least some of that.
  • chelseablue
    chelseablue Posts: 3,303 Forumite
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    Mojisola wrote: »
    The people who know his name probably know at least some of that.

    Good idea I will try and find out. Not sure anyone will remember much after 35 years but worth a shot
  • macman
    macman Posts: 53,098 Forumite
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    Why not start with your own birth certificate, which will give his name, occupation and place of birth? Once you track his date of birth too, it should be very straightforward, regardless of a common name.
    No free lunch, and no free laptop ;)
  • chelseablue
    chelseablue Posts: 3,303 Forumite
    Name Dropper First Post First Anniversary
    macman wrote: »
    Why not start with your own birth certificate, which will give his name, occupation and place of birth? Once you track his date of birth too, it should be very straightforward, regardless of a common name.

    My birth certificate says 'Unknown' in the Fathers section
  • skint_chick
    skint_chick Posts: 872 Forumite
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    So how did your uncle know him - through work then what did your dad do/ where did he? Through something social - would your dad still be in touch with people with in that club/with those interests? Does your cousin know roughly what age he would be based on your uncle's age? If he went back to Ireland to be with family then maybe he is still in Wexford - worth a google and maybe worth a post on boards.ie regional section. If your uncle came to England with your dad then it's likely they were from the same town/village if it isn't Wexford town itself so well worth asking your cousin for more details about where her dad was from and does he still have cousins etc there that you could contact to see if they know your dad's family.

    The other thing you need to think about is what happens if this doesn't have the outcome you want and he isn't interested in being found/having a relationship with you

    Check ancestry on a free trial for family trees containing any info on him (I've had 2 distant family members contact me this way when tree matches came up) and check the message boards for the family surname to see if anyone else is looking for him or you can find out anything new.
    "I cannot make my days longer so I strive to make them better." Paul Theroux
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