Praise for My Hermes

I've always found them to be reliable too. On occasion they've put a parcel over the neighbour's fence thinking it is mine, but that's easily solved.

I do think some customers go out of their way to be difficult, and when a small problem occurs would rather kick off than just use their own common sense.

Often undervalued for their fitness and sporting prowess, many of them can fling your valuable and marked fragile items over an 8 foot garden fence beyond the ability of even our best Olympic athletes.

And their perceptive powers and technical assessment abilities are unrivalled, its almost mystical how they know that your item being sat behind the gate for 7 hours in torrential rain will in no way harm it, fully confident in the rain deflecting powers of that tatty ripped plastic bag it was shipped in.

Lets not forget their Ninja skills of deception and subterfuge, the careful placing of the package under the doormat or wedged behind the porch light rendering it entirely invisible to the criminal eye.

Don't dismiss their driving prowess, don't be distracted by the 20 year old Zafira looking like a skip inside and out, the 100's of parcels loose inside find a natural distribution giving the vehicle unparalleled handling and added security, if stolen police can follow the cloud of oil smoke for miles.

Finally their plucky resourcefulness, in the absence of a 'while you were out card' they cunningly scribe their messages like 'over your gate' on a handy piece of junk-mail recovered from your letterbox, safe in the knowledge that 2 days letter when your sorting out the recycling you will no doubt see the message and retrieve you parcel from outside after its extended refreshing dousing by the glorious British weather.

I almost feel guilty preferring click and collect from the local Argos.