Feeling like I never learn....

If you're happy to carry on living with a black cloud of debt, no money to call your own and dreading opening the post/answering the phone/door every day then carry on as you are, but if you're not then you need to do something about it!

FatPuddingMumma wrote: »

Exactly!
I know it's all there, and I know I want to change but I guess I just don't know how? Where to start, how to stay on track, keep motivated.
I'm a procrastinator by nature but our lives are going to be like this forever if it carries on, which I just can't bear the thought of!

Just try to look at the big picture. Think about how much money you'll have to spend when you're debt free. Set yourself small goals, like buy a takeaway each time you clear £1k of debt or something like that Adapt the £1k to suit your personal circumstances and what you would consider 'small.'

I was in same position as you FPM and I finally had enough of not living and being scared to open the mail. It was almost destructive - missing bills, adding charges etc.
My eyes were intentionally closed off to the mess bubbling away. Then one day recently I got fed up that everyone else has holidays etc and I never do. So I got a pen and paper and wrote all my debts down including monthly interest repayments. When I saw I was handing ober £300 per month in interest that was enough for me. Im still in very early days but am learning more and more about myself.
For example today I am soooo close to buying summer dresses as they are a bargain but right now Ive decided to get my summer wardrobe out from under the bed!! Its one step at a time.... its not easy but I can feel my breathing space expanding bit by bit!!

Oh and takeaways - yep I did that all the time (rude not to 2 for tuesdays right??) but now I have a few ready meals and pizzas on standby in the freezer every week. Not perfect but its a step in the right direction!

Maybe doing a fresh SOA will help? I plan to do one monthly from now o to keep my eye on the ball!

Ooh.... and best piece of advice I got from here so far.... freeze credit cards in a block of ice and keep in freezer.
So they are there for an emergency but not readily available for daily use.

I'd try doing two things - first do an honest SOA, and see where you think your money is going each month, then keep a spending diary for at least a month - write down every little thing you buy (it might seem a chore to begin with but I found it's the only way to really know exactly what you spend your money on) You can then update your SOA to show your true spending areas / problem areas and look at how to address them.

One good tip is to pick something you really want, for some it's a holiday or perhaps decorating a room, a weekend away, or a nice meal out. Print off pictures of this 'reward' item and keep them anywhere you spend - perhaps a screensaver or a copy stuck to your laptop if you internet shop, a copy in your purse, a copy on the fridge next to that takeaway menu etc. Every time you are tempted to spend on x,y,z or old habits kick in - look at that picture and think that the money could be going towards that. It doesn't mean you can never have a takeaway (assuming your financial situation allows for it) but that extra little prompt may help curb some of the areas you struggle with.