It's not a lot, but it's enough

Morning all,

Yesterday I saw the ex for a final time. We met to exchange each others stuff and have a final chat. She asked that I come with an open mind, and I did. We sat and spoke for around an hour and a half and I was sooooooooo close to giving in and going back just to make her happy. It pains me so much to see her upset especially knowing that it's because of me.

I stuck to my guns and trusted my gut instinct. She eventually accepted and the final half an hour was really nice; we laughed, joked and reminisced about the day we met. We vowed to keep in touch with each other which I'm happy about too.

So that's it. Done.

It'll take some time to get used to it and I feel a bit lost at times with all the free time I now have, so I'll keep myself busy doing things I enjoy. I've made more time to see my gran every week, I'll walk the dogs on these frosty and misty mornings, I'll visit the gym more often, I'll prepare healthy meals, I'll get on top and maintain a clean and tidy house and car, I'll socialise more with my friends and I'll focus on bettering myself. I don't want to squander this time.

I looked through the presents that I have bought for xmas and I've only got a handful of things left to buy, most of which are for kids. I should manage it this month with my remaining £80 I've budgeted which means I won't spend a penny in December on Xmas shopping - unbelievable.

Providing I don't over spend this month I've set myself a huge task going forward. The last few months I've saved £375 a month. Soon as I get paid, it goes straight into savings - boom. I however plan on increasing that to £500 a month and starting in December seems bold given the various nights out and the like, so need to shop smart this month and save. That'll mean by June I should have £3,850 saved. Enough for a mortgage deposit? Possibly not, but it's a start.

Can I say again, thanks to everyone who offered their advice in the last week or so, really is appreciated.

joeyjimbles wrote: »

Good for you and good to have a plan. Fortunately December will be nice and distracting with parties and family events hopefully so you'll have a good time, plus you can give your new job the focus that you want which will hopefully help with your financial goals.
Lovely that you are seeing more of your grandma - it will mean a great deal to her, I'm sure. Our family recently all got together for my mother's birthday and she is still talking about how lovely it was three weeks later.
Hope you have a good weekend.

Indeed December will be distracting however it could be for the wrong reasons with various Xmas nights out. I'll just need to be sensible with the cash. May take the car on occasions when I wouldn't have previously.

My gran will enjoy it, I'm her only grandson and I love spending time with her - her positive energy is contagious. What a woman.

Hi all,

Pleased to say that yesterday came and went without spending and today will be the same In fact, I'm confident that the remainder of the weekdays will be the same given my prep for lunches and the like.

In planing for the future via YNAB, I've a category to save for a car deposit so that when I come to trade my car in I can get a new one and pay off quite a chunk at the same time and lower my monthly payments. I've also booked to go to the races next year in hospitality (at a discounted rate) so I've started to budget for that so it'll all be paid for by the time July comes around. I'll probably take my mum or my gran. Lastly, my friends were talking of going to T in the Park next year so I've started to budget for that but even if it doesn't go ahead, that money can be spent on the mortgage!

I have £70 budgeted to spend for Christmas presents this month, which is more than enough to get my remaining gifts. I do have my mums birthday present to buy though so I'll maybe only need £20- £30 for that which will free up some cash.

As I said before, next month I'm going to put away £500 which is more than a third of my wages. By the time I add on my DD's for the month it'll be pretty tight but my thinking is that if I can save £500 in the most expensive month of the year then I can do it any month. And when the time comes that I do have a mortgage I'll have a monthly expense similar to this so I better get used to it.

Feeling super motivated now.

Louby - I try. If you had told me this time last year I'd be like this I wouldn't have believed you. I suppose it's down to the lesson learned from getting in debt.

Unfortunately, despite my predictions, today won't be a NSD as I have football tonight so that'll cost me £3. Also I read the MSE Newsletter today and I think I might finish my Xmas shopping on Friday/this weekend given the heavy discounts. I was in Glasgow last Saturday for a few things and it was soooo busy. It normally doesn't bother me but it really put me off getting anything so I'll stick to online for the most of it I think.

Yesterday my ex came round to collect the last of her stuff. It was really hard seeing her so upset, she was just in bits. She's making a lot of effort to try and change my mind which hasn't gone unnoticed. I wish I didn't feel the way I do at times but it's for the best - for both of us. Anyway..

My phone is past it's best and I'm due a new one so I'll do some shopping around for the best deal but initial searches show I won't get better than at least £35 a month. I'll try though.

Have a nice day all.

jvr wrote: »

Just finished your diary! Wow you have done an amazing job with the debt and saving definitely inspired me to budget better. Sorry the situation with your ex must be difficult. I have been her in this situation and years down the line I can genuinely say I am grateful he ended it and stuck to that, I think my fear of change would have left me in a relationship that just wasn't quite right for far to long if he hadn't had the guts to end it despite me hurting.
Are things any better with your manager? I have a fab line manager, my problem is her manager that blocks everything!

Thanks for reading jvr. Hope it helped show that if I can do it, anyone can.

That's something I tried to tell her the other night, that it's best for us both but of course she couldn't see that but time is a great healer and I'm sure she'll realise in due course.

He's quite a distant manager so we rarely cross paths which means its hard to tell if he truly thinks it's water under the bridge or not. Things are better though and that's all I can ask. Just need to keep the head down and do my best.