It's not a lot, but it's enough

louby40 · 5 November 2016 at 4:46PM

Hi Speky

I hope you're ok this morning.

I ended a 6 yr relationship in Dec 2013. It was an awful time but he wasn't good for my 2 boys so it had to end. We had a MASSIVE mortgage together and debt. A lot of my current debt is because of him and the break up.

But it was the best thing to do.

It will be for you (and her)

Louby

SpekySquarehead · 5 November 2016 at 5:30PM

CCL & Louby - Hi and thanks for your advice.

I feel surprisingly fine today. Concerned for her though as I know she's hurting. She text my mum asking her to try and change my mind or make sense of it but my mum knows I'm doing it for the right reasons.

I'm fine with it all. I've made my decision and I stand by it and the reasons I came to that conclusion. Thank you so much to each of you who offered your advice, it really was helpful.

SpekySquarehead · 5 November 2016 at 5:31PM

CCL & Louby - Hi and thanks for your advice.

I feel surprisingly fine today. Concerned for her though as I know she's hurting. She text my mum asking her to try and change my mind or make sense of it but my mum knows I'm doing it for the right reasons.

I'm fine with it all. I've made my decision and I stand by it and the reasons I came to that conclusion. Thank you so much to each of you who offered your advice, it really was helpful.

crazy_cat_lady · 6 November 2016 at 12:07PM

Pleased your doing ok Speky. Stay strong. She doesn't know it yet but you're doing the best thing for both of you x

SpekySquarehead · 7 November 2016 at 9:47AM

Good morning all,

I had a quiet weekend and the spends were all planned and budgeted for. Got a big shop in yesterday so should manage to prep all my meals for the week ahead and keep spending to a minimum.

Surprisingly, I didn’t hear much from my ex over the weekend (feels weird saying ‘ex’). My gran seemed concerned I was missing out on starting a family and to her own admission, that was due to more traditional beliefs – married, a mortgage and kids by 24. When I was younger I too had that vision of having a wife, 1 or 2 kids and lovely home by the age that I am now and so it’s disappointing but happiness is the important thing and that’s what I am looking for.

Anyway. Thank you again everyone for your advice. Really means a lot.

Have a lovely week.

joeyjimbles · 7 November 2016 at 11:45PM

Keep on being you - if its not right for you now then it wouldn't be right for you down the line with the complications of house ownership, marriage etc. Its not fun but that's part of being a grown up and at least its just the two of you to upset.
Hope you had a decent day.

louby40 · 8 November 2016 at 9:04AM

People get married and start families at all different ages. I didn't have my first son until I was 30!

You're still young.

Enjoy your week

SpekySquarehead · 8 November 2016 at 9:44AM

Morning,

Thanks Joey and louby. Sound advice as always. I'm continuing to power through and keep myself busy.

On the MSE front, I managed a NSD yesterday and today should be the same. I've brought my lunch and snacks to work with me and I've a curry waiting at home for me too - sorted.

Trying to get myself into a routine again so going to the gym regularly, reading and doing those things I rarely had time for before last week. I'm creating a list of odd jobs to tackle when I manage to have the time, a lot of which involve cleaning sadly enough.

Spendertosaver_2 · 8 November 2016 at 6:21PM

Hi Speky,
Have read all of your diary and it was reading it I decided to sign up and start my own diary! You have accomplished so much and I really hope you get the mortgage you want next year!
Regarding your recent break up, it sounds like you did exactly the right thing. Gut feeling is normally right and there is no point in dragging something out in the hope of not hurting anyone. You (and your ex) will both be ok and in the long term I am sure you will realise that you made the best decision you could!
Keep up the good work!

SpekySquarehead · 9 November 2016 at 10:26AM

Spendertosaver wrote: »

Hi Speky,
Have read all of your diary and it was reading it I decided to sign up and start my own diary! You have accomplished so much and I really hope you get the mortgage you want next year!
Regarding your recent break up, it sounds like you did exactly the right thing. Gut feeling is normally right and there is no point in dragging something out in the hope of not hurting anyone. You (and your ex) will both be ok and in the long term I am sure you will realise that you made the best decision you could!
Keep up the good work!

Good morning and thank you for taking the time to read up and I'm glad it's helped provide as motivation. It's a cliche which I actually don't like but it applies; if I can do it, anyone can do it.

I'm confident I've made the right decision and I'm slowly getting used to the change in schedule. My ex and I used to see each other most days (maybe part of the problem) and so now I've got all this free time which I plan on spending wisely.

So back to a MSE front. Another NSD yesterday, making it 5 for the month so far. I anticipate today will be the same too. An old colleague of mine asked me out for some drinks on Saturday night after the Scotland vs Australia rugby game. If I know him, it'll be a late one so I'm toying wither to go or not.

Tonight I am going to look out all the presents I've bought for Xmas and check who I've still to buy for. I've been that organised this year I'm losing track! Afterwards I'll know where I stand and can keep my eyes peeled.

Have a nice day everyone.

It's not a lot, but it's enough

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