My cat died alone and I feel so guilty :(
cottage_retreatist
Posts: 844 Forumite
I wrote a thread like this 3 years ago.
http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=4955121
And now I'm writing one again. I got a call this morning to say my beautiful bombay [edit:not bengal as originally said, not thinking straight!] beast of a boy Sinbad passed away last night.
He had been at a veterinary hospital being treated for hyperthyroid and the thought of him there alone, afraid and without having seen us for a few days breaks my heart
And I thought I was doing what was best for him.
http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=4955121
And now I'm writing one again. I got a call this morning to say my beautiful bombay [edit:not bengal as originally said, not thinking straight!] beast of a boy Sinbad passed away last night.
He had been at a veterinary hospital being treated for hyperthyroid and the thought of him there alone, afraid and without having seen us for a few days breaks my heart
And I thought I was doing what was best for him.
Debts @ LBM (May 2013): £25,250.27 | Debt Free: May 2015 :j:j
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Comments
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cottage_retreatist wrote: »And I thought I was doing what was best for him.
And I'm sure you were.
I'm so sorry for your loss - big hugs.0 -
I'm sorry to hear of your loss too.
You were doing your best for him.0 -
cottage_retreatist wrote: »I wrote a thread like this 3 years ago.
http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=4955121
And now I'm writing one again. I got a call this morning to say my beautiful bengal beast of a boy Sinbad passed away last night.
He had been at a veterinary hospital being treated for hyperthyroid and the thought of him there alone, afraid and without having seen us for a few days breaks my heart
And I thought I was doing what was best for him.
You were doing the best for him...& never think you weren't.
It would have been easy to have ignored his symptoms and do nothing.
Be kind to yourself - you have nothing to reproach yourself over.0 -
thank you all for your comments, i hope we did the best we could, I just feel we went for the easy option rather than the thought of giving him tablets every day and if we'd done that he would not have been left in that hospital with no contact (due to the radiation they had minimal contact with cats being treated).Debts @ LBM (May 2013): £25,250.27 | Debt Free: May 2015 :j:j0
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I think feeling guilty is sometimes one of the stages of the grief - there's always a thought that you could have done something differently. If your car had died at home you might be kicking yourself for not giving him every chance with hospital treatment.
I have an inkling of what you feel - my last girl had to be PTS in kennels when I went on holiday. You can only do what you thought was the right choice at the time - you did do your best for him but sadly it just didn't work out.All shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of things shall be well.
Pedant alert - it's could have, not could of.0 -
I think feeling guilty is sometimes one of the stages of the grief - there's always a thought that you could have done something differently. If your car had died at home you might be kicking yourself for not giving him every chance with hospital treatment.
I have an inkling of what you feel - my last girl had to be PTS in kennels when I went on holiday. You can only do what you thought was the right choice at the time - you did do your best for him but sadly it just didn't work out.
I'm so sorry about your doggy Elsien. I think its that thing of 'is this real'? thats what I'm feeling right now, cause I didnt see it, I can believe its not true, but it is true. and that is what breaks my heart Debts @ LBM (May 2013): £25,250.27 | Debt Free: May 2015 :j:j0 -
I had an occasion when I left a dog at a vets overnight, he was very poorly, they rang early evening to say that his lungs were filling with fluid and there was little they could do. I could have said hold on till I get there, but the thought of him suffering for 30 minutes +, was not worth it, so I told them to give him the injection and put him out of his suffering. He was the only dog that I wasn't there for at the end.
You did the best thing, I believe I did the best thing. It's horrible to think of them being alone and seeing their empty bed and their bowl on the floor, but if you hadn't taken them to the vet, you'd be on asking if you did enough for him. As owners, we can be very hard on ourselves.
It would have been quick and the vet staff would have stroked him at the end.
Hugs to you.0 -
I had an occasion when I left a dog at a vets overnight, he was very poorly, they rang early evening to say that his lungs were filling with fluid and there was little they could do. I could have said hold on till I get there, but the thought of him suffering for 30 minutes +, was not worth it, so I told them to give him the injection and put him out of his suffering. He was the only dog that I wasn't there for at the end.
You did the best thing, I believe I did the best thing. It's horrible to think of them being alone and seeing their empty bed and their bowl on the floor, but if you hadn't taken them to the vet, you'd be on asking if you did enough for him. As owners, we can be very hard on ourselves.
It would have been quick and the vet staff would have stroked him at the end.
Hugs to you.
thank you so much for your kind words. unfortunately the vet has told us he died overnight and they found him in the morning. I can only pray it was quick and painless Debts @ LBM (May 2013): £25,250.27 | Debt Free: May 2015 :j:j0 -
I am so sorry for your loss, it must have been a great shock. Can the vets explain why he died as understanding may help?
The radio active treatment is the gold standard and much better than tablets so you really did try and give him the best.0 -
Im so sorry for your loss,
I feel what you are going through,
a couple of years ago one of my lovely cats was attacked by a dog
in my garden,
god knows how he survived the terrible injuries,
2 weeks later he went back to the vets just to have a couple of wounds restitched,
I waited for the vets to call me to pick him up and when they called me it was to tell me had a massive stroke and would not recover.
The guilt I felt was overwhelming,if I didnt take him that day he would be alive etc,I really felt like I had killed him.
I still feel devastated by what happened but I know I did the best I could for him.
I decided that I had to try and make something good from such an awful thing so I adopted an elderly cat that had been chucked in a box and abandoned,no one wanted this cat due to his age (and bad teeth),he deserved a chance and he could never take my other cats place but he gave me something to focus on other that the grief and the guilt,
please be kind to yourself ,you did your absolute best ,
Charlie.0
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