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Gitdog's guide to seasonal dog training.

Winter
Do you want to go out? Umm, rain, cold, ice, let me think about it, urrm, nope.
Sit You are aware of the temperature of the pavement, are you not?
Down. YOU CANNOT BE SERIOUS.
Come Yep, no problem, just as soon as I’ve detoured the puddle. Can’t possibly allow the feet to get wet.
Look at me. SQUIRRELL!!!!!!!!!!


Summer
Do you want to go out? I may indeed consider a gentle saunter through the door before collapsing on the nearest patch of grass in a sunbathing heap.
Sit Think I’ll bypass that one and go straight for the down, if that’s ok.
There is grass, and sun, after all.
Down. Grass. Sun. Already there, obsolete command.
Come. Grass. Sun. Would you settle for a nice commando crawl?
Look at me Grass. Sun. Sleep.
All shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of things shall be well.

Pedant alert - it's could have, not could of.

Comments

  • ... but as soon as you've settled down with a hot chocolate in front of your absolute most fave telly programme he'll decide it's WALKIES!!!!!! TIME!!!!!
    A kind word lasts a minute, a skelped erse is sair for a day.
  • pawsies
    pawsies Posts: 1,957 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Combo Breaker I've been Money Tipped!
    Take a mat with you for the precious prince? :)
  • lisa110rry
    lisa110rry Posts: 1,794 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Combo Breaker Mortgage-free Glee!
    Winter
    Do you want to go out? It's 06.30, of course I do! How long do I have to wait for you to don hat, scarf, waxed coat, boots, gloves, remove gloves to get bags, re-apply gloves, get lead and open the door? Come on!!!!!
    Sit Could I just hover in the "sit" position?
    Down. YOU CANNOT BE SERIOUS.
    Come Yep, no problem, just as soon as I’ve detoured the puddle. Not lady-like to splish through it.
    Look at me. SNOW!!!!!!!!!!


    Summer
    Do you want to go out? See above for winter, thank goodness you're a bit quicker now.
    Sit Yep, no problem, is that a t-r-e-a-t I see?
    Down. That wastes a lot of playing time you know, SQUIRREL!
    Come. Yes, yes, yes! SQUIRREL!
    Look at me SQUIRREL! RABBIT! DUCK! SWAN! (oops, no, perhaps not)
    “And all shall be well. And all shall be well. And all manner of things shall be exceeding well.”
    ― Julian of Norwich
    In other words, Don't Panic!
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