Not Strong enough

gailey_2 · 13 January 2010 at 8:07AM

Hi just wanted to say

you looked into if you entitled to healthy start vouchers which allow you to buy baby milk,cows milk,fruit and veg?
Our clinic used to sell milk slightly cheaper not sure if they do anymore im still bf so havent looked into it.
From memory with my 1stfollow on milk 6m+used to be slighly cheaper and sometimes on offer 2for £8 or £2 for 10 plus boots you could buy it with advantage points.
Sainsburys has baby sale event at the moment.

Shoparound for wipes i find asda seems to have best babywipe deals buy in bulk but latest ones were 6*pampers wipes £3.66 boots, co-op/somerfeild pampers half price £1.14 each, boots laways seems to be 1.99 bogoff.
I always shop around buy on offer or own brand only.

nappies I use cloth and so glad i do as couldent afford to spend money on nappies atm buy my eldest pull up pants for nite once a fortnight and begrudge that.
Brought most of nappies 2ndhand been lucky this timenot spent much at all and washing amchines on daily but wash nappies every 2-3days its not that high maintainace as people think.

baby food assume you just started weaning and its so cheap to make your own.
oundstretcher do tiny pots pack of 6 £1 or you can use icecube trays.
I have cheap hand blender £4.99.
early days quite simple purees ie cook carrotspuree with unsalted butter and splash of milk creamy carrot puree.
If adventourous defrost and mix 2 veg together.
I did used to buy baby cereal and baby rice where you just add milk and water great for breackfasts, eldest seemed to love baby yogurts lots easily availiable little stars always seems to be on offer as good dessert.
easy baby desserts is mashed banana , avacodo can be mashed no need to cook.

Google bay food recipies an annabel karmel to free baby recipies.

Loyalty cards dont forget use advantage card on boots
nectar in sainsbursy can also be used in adams and other shops.
tesco clubcard particuarly good as can double up so cashed in 10quids worth of vouchers for £20clothing voucher to get stuff for my daughter.
we saving our nectar adavntagefor xmas presents and food for dec however clubcard we will we use throughout year for days out, meals out and clothes.

Look up your local nct website as their nearly new sales are fab.
our local church has nearly new sale and baby and toddlers costs £1 includes coffee and biscuit.

carboots are fab in summer brought tonnes of baby clothes there.
ebays great can still get top brands at fraction of price.
I try and save and buy in sales or at discount outlets.
Always have anoisy round charity shops too
local paper been good for biggerthings.

Made fortune selling on baby things just been ruthless and sold few bundles.
freind has older baby nearly 1 and is taking picsof 6-9 and 9-12for me.

I would pursue ex for maintainance definatly.
what catalougues you got? littlewoods been ok and you can come to repayment agreement with them.

food bill could be reduced slightly we spend that and we 2adults,4yearold and baby includes toilitries,wipes and pullups twice a month.

We alway shop around buy whats on offer only, own brand products,rummage round rediced and try cook lots from scratch and freeze i tubs to make homemade readymeals. Checkout old style board.

presents check out up your income survey sites as valued opinions and lightspeed offer shopping vouchers for most shops so roughly 10surveys a year £10 every littlehelps.

Have big sort out and ebay like mad.

good luck try stay positive always support here

Sarah2490 · 13 January 2010 at 3:03PM

Thank you all for being so kind and offering lots of help/advice

claiming form the father is something I need to think about but do not feel emotionally ready to face that just yet . . . one thing at a time

gonzo127 · 13 January 2010 at 3:36PM

Sarah2490 wrote: »

Thank you all for being so kind and offering lots of help/advice

claiming form the father is something I need to think about but do not feel emotionally ready to face that just yet . . . one thing at a time

i am sorry that this will come across a bit harsh however you need to stop 'thinking' about claiming from the father and actually do it, your child needs you to be a happy mummy and money worries such as you have at the moment will not be making a happy mummy.

the father has a responsibility to help look after the person he helped create, simple as that.

i do not know the reasons you are not with the father however nothing should stop you from claiming the support you need to look after your child. surely your child deserves this support?

i really do feel so much for you in your situation and you are so brave for facing up to it here however you do need to swallow the remaining part of your pride and speak to one of the debt charities and also start the ball rolling with getting maintenance from the father - not only do YOU deserve the help your child deserves to have these things there to help you and her

since you have not spoken to the father you will probably have to go through the CSA http://www.csa.gov.uk/ yes there have been loads of bad press about them however you need to start the ball rolling somehow and this would be the way i would advise

crapwithcash82 · 13 January 2010 at 3:42PM

Hi Sarah, I didn't want to read and run! Just wanted to say welcome and I think you must be stronger than you think to cope with your partner leaving you and bringing up a baby on your own while trying to deal with your debts too! Thats a lot to have to cope with and you've done the right thing by trying to deal with the debts.

You'll get lots of great advice and support on here, sometime you just need someone to tell you that things will get better and it gives you a little boost, you'll definately find that here!

One thing I was going to mention, are the mother and baby clubs that Boots and Tesco's have, if you sign up to them you'll get newsletters with vouchers specifically for mums & babies... as they say every little helps!

Keep your chin up, and good luck on your journey to debt freedom!

RAS · 13 January 2010 at 4:00PM

Sarah

Join www.fregle.co.uk - like e-bay but you get the goods for free. Loads of things for small people and households. Maybe some clothes for you as well.

louise3965 · 13 January 2010 at 4:08PM

and also it can be isolating for new mums. Join badmothersclub or mumsnet - they are both free and very supportive too x

Sarah2490 · 13 January 2010 at 5:26PM

I've been on the CCCS website and have started to fill in the SOA type thing they have on there I do not know what to put as a monthly amount for Gas/Electric as I have never paid a monthly DD before? Will the power company just set this for me and if so how much is it likely to be?

Also I am not sure what my full income out going will be as this will change a little when I go back to work as there will be more travel cost and added child care cost but my pay and benefits will go up slightly. Would I be better waiting until I know exact amounts (next 3-4 weeks) or can you review/make changes to a payment plan

last question! I have read that I will need to change my bank (HSBC) as they are one of the people I owe money to. Who would I be able to get and account with and would I still be able to have a switch card? The only reason I need a switch card is so that I can do online food shopping as I do not drive and find it very difficult food shopping with a little one and it's 2 buses to get the the supermarket

Little_Miss_Saving_Money · 13 January 2010 at 5:49PM

Hi Sarah,

I really do sympathise with your situation and as you have said...one thing at a time.

I am sure it is hard work being a single parent and I am sorry the father has disappeared - I am sure he is the one missing out seeing his daughter grow up - anyhow, please make the phone call to phone of the Debt agencies, I am sure you will feel better in yourself when you have done this.

You do not want added stress of debt repayments when caring for your daughter, starting a new job etc.

You have received some great support from people on here, keep posting, I am sure you will gain lots of confidence and motivation from the nice people on here - at the end of the day, you are doing your best to clear your debts and you can't do more other than being MSE all the way!

Best wishes to you, keep your chin up things can only get better, you have made the first step by joining us lot on here;) LMSM

Little_Miss_Saving_Money · 13 January 2010 at 5:59PM

gonzo127 wrote: »

i am sorry that this will come across a bit harsh however you need to stop 'thinking' about claiming from the father and actually do it, your child needs you to be a happy mummy and money worries such as you have at the moment will not be making a happy mummy.

the father has a responsibility to help look after the person he helped create, simple as that.

i do not know the reasons you are not with the father however nothing should stop you from claiming the support you need to look after your child. surely your child deserves this support?

i really do feel so much for you in your situation and you are so brave for facing up to it here however you do need to swallow the remaining part of your pride and speak to one of the debt charities and also start the ball rolling with getting maintenance from the father - not only do YOU deserve the help your child deserves to have these things there to help you and her

since you have not spoken to the father you will probably have to go through the CSA http://www.csa.gov.uk/ yes there have been loads of bad press about them however you need to start the ball rolling somehow and this would be the way i would advise

gonzo, you are absolutely right. My niece has just successfully claimed £10.00 maintenance payments from her ex-husband to help support their little girl. Okay not much but it all helps. He even had the nerve to say "you won't get anything from me as I am a Bankrupt" - charming eh towards his own daughter. I think Sarah should at least try and track him down and get some financial support from him. Have a nice evening. LMSM

Little_Miss_Saving_Money · 13 January 2010 at 6:05PM

Sarah, sorry if this has already been asked by someone else BUT are all the debts in your name or do some belong to your daughter's father?

Re Gas and Electric, telephone them, they may be able to give you an estimated cost per month. It will depend on how many bedrooms you have, lounge, kitchen, bathroom etc. If I was you I would get the DD's set up asap, especially with the Winter months here.

Also re the dancing classes, I would be loath to give these up as they are your "outlet" and you have to have something for yourself:j

Have a nice evening;)LMSM

Not Strong enough

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