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Agreement that under no circumstances can any family members move in to our new home
fullofhope
Posts: 5 Forumite
Hi,
My boyfriend and I have just purchased our first home together and would like to draw up an agreement stating that under no circumstances can any family members move in with us. We are happy for them to stay on a short holiday (max 1 week) with us if they move far away from our area, but do not want any of them trying to move in. We do not know how to word it and need help.
We want it state things like its a joint mutual decision that no family members can move in under any circumstances, no exceptions will be made, they can stay for a max of 1 week on holiday only if moved far out of the area etc.. and if anyone can suggest anything else to add or how we should word, so as not to sound nasty, but sound professional like its been drawn up by a solicitor, we would be really greatful.
We mainly want this agreement in place due to my boyfriends possesive mother (think Pauline Fowler!), who we are sure will at somepoint in the future try to emotionally blackmail us in to allowing her to move in as she will be on her own. Neither of us want this as we both want to be able to live our own lives and start maybe thinking about marriage and starting a family of our own.
We would ask our solicitor to draw up an agreement for us, but we have to save up for our deposit and are throwing every penny at that at present and don't have any spare funds to get them to do it. That's why we have decided on drawing up a mutual agreemtn for us both to sign.
If anyone can help or advise us that would be a really big help.
Thanks
My boyfriend and I have just purchased our first home together and would like to draw up an agreement stating that under no circumstances can any family members move in with us. We are happy for them to stay on a short holiday (max 1 week) with us if they move far away from our area, but do not want any of them trying to move in. We do not know how to word it and need help.
We want it state things like its a joint mutual decision that no family members can move in under any circumstances, no exceptions will be made, they can stay for a max of 1 week on holiday only if moved far out of the area etc.. and if anyone can suggest anything else to add or how we should word, so as not to sound nasty, but sound professional like its been drawn up by a solicitor, we would be really greatful.
We mainly want this agreement in place due to my boyfriends possesive mother (think Pauline Fowler!), who we are sure will at somepoint in the future try to emotionally blackmail us in to allowing her to move in as she will be on her own. Neither of us want this as we both want to be able to live our own lives and start maybe thinking about marriage and starting a family of our own.
We would ask our solicitor to draw up an agreement for us, but we have to save up for our deposit and are throwing every penny at that at present and don't have any spare funds to get them to do it. That's why we have decided on drawing up a mutual agreemtn for us both to sign.
If anyone can help or advise us that would be a really big help.
Thanks
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Comments
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If you need this unenforcable agreement, you should really not be buying property together. What would the penalty be?Been away for a while.0
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Why draw up any kind of agreement?
It's your house, you decide who can stay and for how long.0 -
are you then intending to get your MIL to sign said agreeement? Otherwise there's no point in a bit of paper you've created when its you that have the front door keys and control who is in your house anyway
alternatively have lots of children then there'll be no space for an (aged) grandmother to occupy0 -
Write it up along with the other rules of the house and sign it - things like who takes responsibility for paying the mortgage, household bills, shopping etc, what spending limits are to be set on credit cards etc.
Sign it and leave it pinned to the fridge where ALL visitors can see it.;)Member of the first Mortgage Free in 3 challenge, no.19
Balance 19th April '07 = minus £27,640
Balance 1st November '09 = mortgage paid off with £1903 left over. Title deeds are now ours.0 -
How on earth would you enforce such an agreement - what would the penalty be one of you agreed to have a relative move in? Enforced sale + dividing any equity?
To be honest, it seems like you're looking into a complicated and expensive alternative to telling your mother-in-law to !!!! off ;-)“Don't do it! Stay away from your potential. You'll mess it up, it's potential, leave it. Anyway, it's like your bank balance - you always have a lot less than you think.”
― Dylan Moran0 -
I agree with above, though if I felt that I was being "timed" on a visit I wouldn`t want to bother0
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carlislelass wrote: »I agree with above, though if I felt that I was being "timed" on a visit I wouldn`t want to bother
Dont be silly, why on earth would anybody want to move in with you.
If someone asks to move in then a simple 'sorry, but no' would be sufficient.
If they ask to come for a holiday just lie and say you can stay for a few days but my oh has family coming on Saturday or something.
Doing this agreement would only stir up bad feeling.make the most of it, we are only here for the weekend.
and we will never, ever return.0 -
I'm all for being prepared - but blimey!
If you can't trust the word of your OH should you really be moving in together?Some days you're the dog..... most days you're the tree!
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You're crazy. It'd never work.0
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PasturesNew wrote: »You're crazy.
I agree.
Just show the MIL this thread. There is no way she'd want to move in with a couple of nutters like yourselves. In the nicest possible way.
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