Can't stop spending...

sarahowen

I need some practical tips because I cannot stop spending money that I don't have. My income has been reduced after having a child and only going back to work part time and I seem to have not grasped the fact that my wages aren't the same...

Any one got any bright ideas as to what I can do? I can't go round the shops at the moment, because my daughter has chickenpox, so that is helping, but it's almost like I feel I need to do it. It doesn't necessarily matter what it is I buy, just as long as I buy something...

All help (including !!!! kicking!) gratefully received...

skylight

I would start by getting yourself off to your local library and borrowing some psychology books on habits and addictions.

If you have to buy something that stinks of addiction.

I love spending too. Usually on other people rather than me. I have also learnt to budget for it and restrict what I spend - big time. I find it better now to have a day out "shopping" with £30 and I come home with far far more than I ever used to, than go out almost daily.....

newyorkcitybride

I completely agree with Skylight....

If you physically feel the "need" to do something regardless of all the facts, i.e you dont have any money, then it sounds as if the problem is deeper rooted.

Do you normally spend on yourself, your daughter, the house etc? Knowing what you seem to spend unecessarily on might help to identify what you might have an issue with?

Are you back at work now, or are you returning to work part time soon? Maybe its not really the need to spend, but the need to feel like you're doing something... which has a tangible result? Even on my days off I feel like I'm wasting time just being indoors all day when I could be at work, doing something and seeing the end result, but if I go into town and come home with something I feel like I've done something, like my day was worth something...

Crazy thought I know... maybe just sitting down and having a bit of a think on these things might help.
In terms of your income being reduced do you have a new budget organised?

sarahowen

No, I'm back at work already. I don't know that I've analysed it enough to be honest; maybe 'need' was a poor choice of words. If I'm not spending, I think about things I want or feel I 'need' to buy. I mean, think about it a lot. Even whilst I'm typing this post. I find it really hard to be out and not buy something. It doesn't really matter who I buy for - daughter, house, other people, myself.

Will definitely give the addiction book thing a go...

dhassen

Sounds like you're addicted......

Can't help with that, in fact this probably won't help at all, but you could get into eBay, and sell some stuff, then only ever buy things there with the money you've made from selling. Good way to buy without it reaaaaly costing you much

RAS

Hi

Even better

Join the local group on www.freecycle.org. Like e-nbay but you get things for free. Just have to pick them up from the OPs.

Another thought might be to do a clothesswap with your mates. You all gwet something new to you and it cost nought.

jessicad_2

have you tried writing down what you spend. I have found that keeping a spending diary even for a month has really focused me on actually money going out especially when I see it adding up. If you do have a compulsion or addiction that needs to be dealt with, so I'm not suggestion this is the solution but maybe it could help a little as well as other routes.

Little_Chicken

There's only one thing for it - sign up to the spendaholics thread.;) I've been 'cured' for a month now.:T No lie...:A

poppyoscar_3

when i have felt like this, i have set myself a budget and got that money in cash.

get somebody to look after the cc and cheque book and all you have is the cash - when it's gone, it's gone!

po xx

REDMADCURLS

Yesterday I took all three of our bank accounts and put spending into sections - cash withdrawls, food, petrol, extras (things for house, presents, clothes etc) and I was SHOCKED at what we spend each month - I did it for March and April (so far) I can tell you that ddms and mortgage come to nearly £2000 and so far this month total spend almost double that!!!!!!!!!!! :eek:
My hubby loves spending and he nearly s**t when he saw what he had spent!!
Best thing I ever did

PS If you are a spendaholic - bet you have loads of stuff you dont need/use - get onto Ebay and starting selling - almost as addictive as spending - except you MAKE money!

Cornishpixie_2

I had similar experience used to take kids into town when I was off work and end up spending money on crap. Now I compromise, I kind of came to the conclusion it was a habit I could no longer afford. Not working at mo. so even less money. But I also thought maybe its not the spending, but the need to be doing things so now, I find more things to do outdoors that need not cost that much. Done some baking today, now taking little one to museum, got free yearly pass, I go after lunch so he doesn't nag me to take him to cafe. Guess it's about changing the way you think, and see your bank balance improve. Think what could I be doing, without spending too much money. Today I've had to make play dough cakes imaginary play etc. All in a days work:rotfl: Good luck