Drowning in (son's) debt - getting desperate

Rob5342

I'd suggest that he looks at the pots feature in Monzo which is a very good way to help budget. You can put money into pots and then have direct debits come out of the pots which is a good way of keeping your bills money separate so you can easily see what you hsve left for everything else. 

devondiver

Hi all. Seems we are going the "new main bank account - radio silence until defaults" route. But maybe also talk to Stepchange to see what options they can suggest.

Question: when re-assigning essential DDs to the new bank account should we not cancel (on-line) all the old bank account DDs - just to reduce default/DD return charges?

BTW - after working flat out until Friday son now has the children but is also laid low with a crappy throat/chest virus. Not super-conducive to tackling the issues - so I am making a start. All his accounts are now open to me so plenty of number crunching ahead - and it seems the SOA is a good place to start.

So - any recommendations for suitable SOA tool? And any other issues which may not have had a mention so far?

Rob5342

It's been said before but he needs to take control of this himself. Until/unless he does thst he will never get into a sustainable position. 

devondiver

Rob5342 said:

It's been said before but he needs to take control of this himself. Until/unless he does thst he will never get into a sustainable position. 

Agreed. But . . . . . . . . . You can take a horse to water ........

Sea_Shell

devondiver said:

Rob5342 said:

It's been said before but he needs to take control of this himself. Until/unless he does thst he will never get into a sustainable position. 

Agreed. But . . . . . . . . . You can take a horse to water ........

But if it won't drink, then it'll just have to go thirsty.    

NeverendingDMP

Lemon fool.i think it's called for the summary of affairs.I think there is a sticky thread in here somewhere that has templates of everything including  templates of letters for further down the line. What's the cost.com website would be a good one at this point to thoroughly depress everyone by showing how long it would take to pay off without the defaults,  Likely never it if was like my starting point. Step change have online budget planners on there website but I've honestly found everyone here v honest with any budget I've posted telling me what bits are too high or too low. Some people use spending trackers to help them learn what they actually spend but I've never got to grips with them 😂

devondiver

Sea_Shell said:

devondiver said:

Rob5342 said:

It's been said before but he needs to take control of this himself. Until/unless he does thst he will never get into a sustainable position. 

Agreed. But . . . . . . . . . You can take a horse to water ........

But if it won't drink, then it'll just have to go thirsty.    

- and hungry, and homeless, and worse. And the grandkids? Thanks.

elsien

Lemon fool then format for here if he’s up for sharing it. 

There’s a link on here somewhere but I can never find it so if anyone else is able to share? 

Edit - found it. 

https://www.lemonfool.co.uk/financecalculators/soa.php

With the caveat that very few people get it right first time round and tend to underestimate spending in the different areas, so your son will need to tweak it as he goes along. 

 For example, you can look at his accounts to see what bills he’s paying, et cetera but if he’s getting cash out of the cashpoint and that’s evaporating,  the only person who can work out where it’s going is him. 

devondiver

Guidance on this one please - 
Question: when re-assigning essential DDs to the new bank account should we not cancel (on-line) all the old bank account DDs - just to reduce default/DD return charges?

Floss

devondiver said:

Guidance on this one please - 
Question: when re-assigning essential DDs to the new bank account should we not cancel (on-line) all the old bank account DDs - just to reduce default/DD return charges?

Yes - cancel all DDs & standing orders in the old bank account. Then he needs to contact his landlord, council tax, utilities to advise the new bank details. Any others will be in contact when they next try to take payment.

Please note that your son needs to be completely honest with himself and needs to work out his budget - which is why posting a statement of affairs is being asked for. Folk on here have almost all been where your son is right now (more in some cases) and the knowledge and advice given freely to you comes from experience. His first stab at a budget is a starting point, and will evolve over time.