I'm struggling...

LadyGnome

How many hours a week is your DM caring for your son?  Does he get any disability benefits?  I just wondered if she would qualify for carers' allowance for him?

kimwp

Why is couscous with (defrosted) chopped chicken, peas and carrots, broccoli, spinach etc followed by a piece of fruit not "the best diet"?

Would it be feasible for your mum to help with the dinners so the kids can have packed lunches? You say they have school lunches so you don't need to cook the dinners, but from your description of your day, you aren't home to cook the dinners anyway.

monetxchange

Your daughter is old enough to be encouraged to start cooking basic things that are vaguely healthy, and packing up a packed lunch for her and her brother (not putting this on her because she’s a girl etc but just because she’s the oldest and has no additional needs). Look at it this way, at 15 she could in theory leave home in a year’s time perfectly legally and I’m sure she’d soon learn when bored of crisps full time! Maybe take out a basic cheap cooking book out of the library to get her (and your son too) into a bit of cooking for themselves and maybe for Nan too? Something like Jack Monroe. Or check out the sites for easy recipes.

Someone mentioned building insurance - I also have a shared ownership flat (though equity loan, not part buy part rent) and building insurance is included in the service price. Is that the same for yours? My home and contents insurance costs £5 a month so would work out much cheaper than your appliance insurance.

zcrat41

Do you have a freezer? Try the Batch Lady. I imagine you do 3 of those long days a week plus you must get at least 28 days hol a year. Use two of those hol days to Batch cook plus batching what you cook on your day off will give you loads of meals. 

Good luck 

enthusiasticsaver

I appreciate that you work long hours and it must be soul destroying to  work with very little spare money left over.  The groceries, sky and mobile phones have already been suggested as an area you can cut back although the main issue is the fact there is just one income coming in and your long hours and sons additional needs meaning you have no option other than to use your mum for childcare.  Is it possible for you both to share a property to help you both out financially?  At 15 your daughter could help with doing basic meals to cut back on cost etc.  Baked potatoes are healthy with cheese or baked beans or tuna and don't cost a lot.  Batch cooking bolognese sauce doesn't take long and a pasta dish can be done in 15 or 20 minutes and would be useful for your daughter to learn for when she leaves home for University or whatever. 

Jude57

Another vote for batch cooking here. We're heading into Autumn now (I know, I know, but we are!) so it's the ideal time to get a slow cooker if you haven't already got one. Prepping veg and meat takes minutes and your daughter and mother could help with that, too. Then everyone, including you, gets a hot, nutritious meal at the end of their day. You can buy cheaper cuts of meat as the slow and low heat tenderises even the toughest meat.

A minor point, but if your Council Tax is on 10 monthly payments, consider changing veto 12 monthly instalments. Upside is it reduces your monthly payment, downside is you don't get any 'free' months in Feb/March.

A final thought; why not do your grocery shopping online? I started doing that when I worked long hours as I hated spending my downtime traipsing round the supermarket. For me, the benefits are that I save time, I have to think carefully about what I'll be cooking in the coming week so it helps to meal plan, plus I can't impulse buy. I can do an online food shop any time that's convenient and once you've got your favourites stored online, it's so quick and easy. I know not everyone will agree but it works for me.

Mellee79

I have THE laziest teen. She is infuriating and the best she can do is a tin of ravioli if it doesn't require a tin opener. 
My son is a bit harder to cater for as he is very sensory, unable to cope with certain foods and he only has his baby teeth still (which are just little stumps) so he plumps for soft food.
I REALLY dont want to live with my mum. We both value our own space and actually her moving in with me would not be feasible as I have a 3 bed house so no spare room for her.

Thank you all for your suggestions. I will certainly be scrutinizing my spending and statements, looking for better deals and trying to reduce costs. It's so hard to see the wood for the trees when you feel so low. My mum has been told she was not receiving the carer element to her UC so that has been sorted and she has reduced the £400 to £300.
I will be back to update once I've had a bit of time to get my head on straight. Harder with the kids off school.
We are staying in. Outside costs like £200 a day...

katsu

Appliance insurance is generally a rip off. Cancel it. I'd be surprised if you didn't spend less on contents insurance, which covers more things.

I feel that appliance insurance is a bad deal for most people and it annoys me!  

Bin the sky TV. Have Internet and a phone if you either use the landline or need it for the Internet that is best value. Look at the main site articles for recommendations. You have Netflix and the regular TV (did you put the TV license in your SOA?).

Keep all your receipts and use them to build a real SoA with your true petrol spend and clothes separate to food.

You can do this, you just have to make some changes so you can get your debts down and you'll be amazed how much easier it gets. 

LadyGnome

If your son likes softer food would a slow cooker be an option.  You could put it on in the morning and there would be a meal for your mum to dish up in the evening.  People prep the ingredients the night before or even batch prep and freeze then just take a bag out to defrost in the fridge overnight.

Kakiste

Slow cookers are awesome.

I have bags of chopped frozen veg in the freezer. Today I'm making chicken soup for lunch so i put sliced chicken, stock cubes and then a few handfuls of veg from a number of different bags into the slow cooker this morning when I was making a cup of tea. Ive ignored it since then and at about 1pm there will be ready to eat soup.