We'd like to remind Forumites to please avoid political debate on the Forum... Read More »
We're aware that some users are experiencing technical issues which the team are working to resolve. See the Community Noticeboard for more info. Thank you for your patience.
📨 Have you signed up to the Forum's new Email Digest yet? Get a selection of trending threads sent straight to your inbox daily, weekly or monthly!
Today's the day
Options

jack_1992
Posts: 75 Forumite

I love the idea of keeping a diary and keeping myself accountable.
Today was the day that I've taken the leap. I've known for a while that I was spiralling out of control. It's a mess. I owe just under £20k and that figure is embarrassing to me. I'm embarrassed and ashamed I've managed to get myself into this mess and not sort it out. I feel like I've let myself down but also let me wife and little boy down - that is the worst bit for me.
It's been causing issues with stress, anxiety and sleep and I decided for some reason, today was the day to sort it out. So I woke up this morning and the first thing I did was StepChange. I needed help as I didn't know where to start. In an ideal world, I'd pay it off myself with being able to live at the same time but this clearly is not possible. It's not going to work as I have literally nothing left to spend after my payments are made each month, all but one being minimum payments. After completing the budgeting tool and being brutally honest, I am one step closer to starting the journey and that is with a DMP. I felt ashamed at first that I would need to do this. I was worried about what is going to happen. But I am slowly coming to terms with it as I overplay it in my head all day long.
I have read through threads on here so my next step is to contact my creditors and inform them I am seeking advice and force their hand to default the accounts so that 6 year ticking clock can start and I can build an emergency fund. I'll be honest, it scares me not having the credit to fall back on as I have been so reliant on it for years now. But I think that is the best thing about it. I'm going to become more responsible and I will do this. I must do this.
That's enough for now, but let's hope I keep this up. It is only the start of a long long journey, but I am looking forward to that first monthly payment on the DMP where I can afford to live, enjoy life and not worry as much.
Today was the day that I've taken the leap. I've known for a while that I was spiralling out of control. It's a mess. I owe just under £20k and that figure is embarrassing to me. I'm embarrassed and ashamed I've managed to get myself into this mess and not sort it out. I feel like I've let myself down but also let me wife and little boy down - that is the worst bit for me.
It's been causing issues with stress, anxiety and sleep and I decided for some reason, today was the day to sort it out. So I woke up this morning and the first thing I did was StepChange. I needed help as I didn't know where to start. In an ideal world, I'd pay it off myself with being able to live at the same time but this clearly is not possible. It's not going to work as I have literally nothing left to spend after my payments are made each month, all but one being minimum payments. After completing the budgeting tool and being brutally honest, I am one step closer to starting the journey and that is with a DMP. I felt ashamed at first that I would need to do this. I was worried about what is going to happen. But I am slowly coming to terms with it as I overplay it in my head all day long.
I have read through threads on here so my next step is to contact my creditors and inform them I am seeking advice and force their hand to default the accounts so that 6 year ticking clock can start and I can build an emergency fund. I'll be honest, it scares me not having the credit to fall back on as I have been so reliant on it for years now. But I think that is the best thing about it. I'm going to become more responsible and I will do this. I must do this.
That's enough for now, but let's hope I keep this up. It is only the start of a long long journey, but I am looking forward to that first monthly payment on the DMP where I can afford to live, enjoy life and not worry as much.
Debt Free Journey
6th April 2021 - first steps taken to becoming debt free with StepChange help
6th April 2021 - first steps taken to becoming debt free with StepChange help
5
Comments
-
Well done on making a start. Why not post an soa as you will have to do one for stepchange anyway and it will help you get an idea of how much you can afford to repay each month?I’m a Forum Ambassador and I support the Forum Team on the Debt free Wannabe, Budgeting and Banking and Savings and Investment boards. If you need any help on these boards, do let me know. Please note that Ambassadors are not moderators. Any posts you spot in breach of the Forum Rules should be reported via the report button, or by emailing forumteam@moneysavingexpert.com. All views are my own and not the official line of MoneySavingExpert.
The 365 Day 1p Challenge 2025 #1 £667.95/£162.90
Save £12k in 2025 #1 £12000/£70000 -
I slept well last night - I'm not sure if that is just down to the tiredness over the last few days and lack of sleep, or the fact I felt better yesterday for starting this.
I woke up and started the worry again. What if this, what if that. What if I need credit for something, there is no way I will get anything for years to come! But then I thought, the EF that I will save up before the DMP will help that, I'll have money for emergencies.
Everything has been paid off again now for the month debt wise, so left with hardly anything to get me by. I went shopping yesterday and even had to put that on a credit card. I think this is just solidifying for me that this cannot go on.
I think that when I go on a DMP, I'll actually have cash to spend, not relying on credit knowing it's going to cost me so much more than what I spend in the store. I look forward to the day I use my debit card every day & not a credit card. With the budget I have made, I'll even have money to be able to treat myself every now and then - imagine!!Debt Free Journey
6th April 2021 - first steps taken to becoming debt free with StepChange help1 -
You will find so much help and support on here, an soa would help folk to advise you. I will be cheering you on.1
-
The journey begins! There’s lots of help, advise, support and experience on here.Credit Card 1 £9602.23 £0
Credit Card 2 £7822.07 £0
Credit Card 3 £517.69 £0
Loans to follow once we've moved house!
Emergency/House moving Fund = £58000 -
I am so appreciative of the comments and help I have already received from people in just a few short days. I genuinely feel that this week has been a real turning point. From Tuesday morning when this all started and being anxious and worried, I suddenly am starting to feel so much more relaxed about it. It's an awful situation, but I feel the fact of starting to resolve it makes me feel so much better.
I have already started setting up extra spaces in my Starling account for EF and extra savings as well as round up to my savings account. It will be so refreshing for me to have cash saved in accounts for emergencies as opposed to having to rely on credit. I've never been able to save anything so to have it will feel so good.
For now, there isn't much to do until next month when I get paid. I am just now getting by this month and next month is when it all starts for me with the EF. I am going to put as much away as possible. I wish I had done a better budget sooner with a tool such as on StepChange to incorporate savings etc into my normal life.
One thing is for sure, there needs to be change on what we teach young people. I got credit cards when I was maybe 19/20 and it only got worse from there. We need to be educating our kids on money, credit, mortgages. The only way you seem to learn is by doing it, and look how that gets so many of us.
This diary has been so good for me already. I love coming on first thing and just putting my thoughts down into words. I definitely feel it will be interesting for me in a year, 2 years etc to re-read at the start and see how I am in the future.
Thanks for the views so far and all the support - it really makes a difference knowing you are not the first and unfortunately not the last but that there is always support and help and you just need to ask.Debt Free Journey
6th April 2021 - first steps taken to becoming debt free with StepChange help0 -
It's been an odd week. Being a 4 day work week I felt it dragged and now very much looking forward to the weekend.
It's been an odd week in the fact of that moment when I took the steps on Tuesday to sort this. All my debts for this month are paid so now it's just waiting til next month til they're due and then start the saving for an EF and the process to get these all defaulted and get that DMP setup. It's a long few months to come to get it going and settled and I am dreading those calls and letters, but it's going to get easier and I think I have started to find peace in that. The amount of stress around this has dropped already and it's just beginning.
Anyway - let's see how the weekend goes and time to relax, unwind and enjoy some family time. Debt really does ruin how you feel sometimes and I think this weekend will be good to finally be relaxed knowing I am taking control of everything.Debt Free Journey
6th April 2021 - first steps taken to becoming debt free with StepChange help3 -
Another week and I can't believe it's been nearly a week since this whole thing started.
I had a bit of a wobbly weekend in all honesty. I don't know why but I had a bit of an anxiety flare up. My heart would not stop racing and felt it could jump out my chest at any second.
I kept on doing the sums, even though every time it was the same answer just to check I'd done everything right and I'd be able to live. Then I remembered, I've been living on credit for SO long that finally I'll have actual cash to spend.
I need to keep reminding myself of that.
I'm not necessarily worried about the calls and letters etc when I start to miss payments as I know it's just part of the journey and eventually it'll settle down but I just always find something to worry about I guess.
Anyway - here's to another week and another week closer to being debt free.Debt Free Journey
6th April 2021 - first steps taken to becoming debt free with StepChange help1 -
Well done on taking steps in the right direction
I started a DMP a few years ago and honestly, I understand the anxiety about the letters and phone calls. Even now, when I see an unknown number calling I get a weird little spike of it. But the actual calls dwindle pretty sharpish once you've set the DMP up and the letters usually just correlate to whatever plan you've set up or are automated. Now I hardly get any calls/letters - maybe one every six months "thanks for your payments so far, let us know if you need to change anything" etc.
Good luck on your debt-free journey!Debt List
Safety Net - £105
Zopa CC - £200
Capital One CC1 - £261
Capital One CC2 - £262
Halifax CC - £520
Nationwide Overdraft - £1615
NatWest Loan - £12,390
Nationwide Loan - £14,599
Total: £29,952
Financial Goals
Emergency Fund - £0 / £500
Debt Free Diary: Good With Money1 -
I've been pretty quiet this week as in all honesty, there hasn't been much to say.
I'm just getting by this month, waiting for next payday to really start putting things into action with emergency savings etc and I am so looking forward to just setting a realistic budget and paying on a debit card as opposed to credit.
I updated my info on the GOV website to get the extra little tax rebate for WFH and also updated my yearly income as that was wrong so maybe that will bring in a little extra each month.
I'm going out with some people from work tonight so will spend a little but I have to tell myself that I need a life. I can't just sit in and do nothing whilst I pay this debt down. It's all about being sensible, and living within the budget.
The F1 is back this weekend so I am looking forward to a chilled and relaxed weekend, maybe a few drinks and spending time with my family.
The relief I feel right now is so good - I'm so glad I started this journey.Debt Free Journey
6th April 2021 - first steps taken to becoming debt free with StepChange help2 -
Hi!
I wasn't sure if you had a diary started but stumbled across it, good luck on your journey! I'll be cheering you along the wayI’m a Forum Ambassador and I support the Forum Team on Debt Free Wannabe boards and spending & discounts boards. If you need any help on these boards, do let me know. Please note that Ambassadors are not moderators. Any posts you spot in breach of the Forum Rules should be reported via the report button, or by emailing forumteam@moneysavingexpert.com. All views are my own and not the official line of MoneySavingExpert.
Debt owed;Salad Money - £616.47/£1200 JAJA - £679.70/ £900 Zable - £338.60/£1300 = £1,634.77
Time to start a fresh. — MoneySavingExpert Forum
Time to start a Fresh part 2, 2022! — MoneySavingExpert Forum
New fresh diary for 2023! — MoneySavingExpert Forum
https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/6494873/fresh-diary-for-2024#latest
https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/6577209/fresh-diary-for-2025/p1?new=10
Confirm your email address to Create Threads and Reply

Categories
- All Categories
- 350.7K Banking & Borrowing
- 253K Reduce Debt & Boost Income
- 453.4K Spending & Discounts
- 243.7K Work, Benefits & Business
- 598.5K Mortgages, Homes & Bills
- 176.8K Life & Family
- 256.9K Travel & Transport
- 1.5M Hobbies & Leisure
- 16.1K Discuss & Feedback
- 37.6K Read-Only Boards