The Four D's

FootyFanDan

alt80 said:

@FootyFanDan Well done on the promotion. 

I’m starting to realise family time is more important than buying toys for myself or throwing money around to make up for not being there. Haven’t been a great dad or husband tbf. 

Know what you mean about absent parents, mine had a pub in the middle of nowhere working all hours unless they were at the horses. Looking back now with hindsight me and my sister were practically feral kids lol good times though.

Thank you
Yeah I know exactly what you mean about the family time mate, I think we have always tried to go above and beyond for our daughter but I have noticed as she gets a little older she wants time not things. The little things like playing games, craft time, reading bedtime stories

On another note - I have just started going through your diary and it looks like your also going through alot of mindset changes which can be tough, keep going its worth it.. I will catch up hopefully over next few days 

FootyFanDan

Evening All, 

Hope everyone has had a decent Friday. Its payday today so tonight's plan of action is to move all the money into the relevant pots and accounts.
Today has been a pretty steady day its been pretty windy here today, so did school run and then had a bit of a re-arrange in the living room. Now its dropping a little cooler the room radiator which was hidden behind sofa was doing nothing so had a move about and now should be much better even though house do tend to be a little cold naturally due to layout of house.

Tomorrow the little one is in drama class and then we are going to treat her to lunch out which isn't something we have done for a while but we are also conscious of the current restrictions so need to be steady but we have managed quite well so far. 

Hope you all have a great weekend - time for coffee and excel 😂

mark55man

sounds great weekend Dan !!  Mine involves a lot of sitting down I hope but a bit of a walk if it isn't arctic

FootyFanDan

mark55man said:

sounds great weekend Dan !!  Mine involves a lot of sitting down I hope but a bit of a walk if it isn't arctic

Thanks Mark, have a great (relaxing) weekend. I tend to find my payday routine now becoming less time consuming haha. Everything seems to have just become normal now. 

FootyFanDan

Quick addition - I have not been able to make any payments to the creditors due to the fact I am still waiting on the information to come on where I need to pay these to, hopefully get some news on these shortly but in the mean time I have taken the funds I would normally pay to the debts into a Monzo pot so that its there ready to take when needed. This is something I would never have done in the past I would have thought that as extra and then just worried when time came around. I am also finding I am not spending my monthly personal spends much either so they are just sat building too

The pots are building up nicely but I think next year I am going to have set amounts and use these to hit targets, I had planned to but with COVID stuff most plans went out of the window unfortunately, but I do still think I will have pots accured by time i need to use them

mark55man

I like the concept of being debt-neutral - ie not necessarily paying it off, but having the means (or getting there) to do so when circumstances are optimal for you.  I know what you mean about end of month routine become habitual - that's great sign. Just remember to think a little about how far you've come while you are doing that though.

alt80

@FootyFanDan you sound like a brilliant dad and husband better than I'll ever be. I'm definitely struggling mindset wise always want the toys never want the pain of paying for them haha.

You'll definitely find moving the sofa helps. How do you tend to heat the house? If GFCH and you've got a temperature controlled thermostat set it to a sensible temp (19/20degrees) and make sure its in a room where the temp is stable (not by a door, next to a fire etc) that's what I always advice my tenants. Should do it at home but at this time of year I just light the fire. Rest of house still freezing though lol.

Debt neutral is as good as debt free mate. 

FootyFanDan

mark55man said:

I like the concept of being debt-neutral - ie not necessarily paying it off, but having the means (or getting there) to do so when circumstances are optimal for you.  I know what you mean about end of month routine become habitual - that's great sign. Just remember to think a little about how far you've come while you are doing that though.

Yeah there seems to be a little more of a relaxed approach now, I’ve worked hard to get where I am I guess and certainly don’t want to fall off the wagon so to speak but I know I’m heading in the right direction and chipping away at the remaining amounts. 

I do do try think of the overall journey when I’m feeling at a bit of a standstill with payments, think I also need to realise I can’t hit every goal all at the same time so trying to get into that mindset is the challenge now 

FootyFanDan

alt80 said:

@FootyFanDan you sound like a brilliant dad and husband better than I'll ever be. I'm definitely struggling mindset wise always want the toys never want the pain of paying for them haha.

You'll definitely find moving the sofa helps. How do you tend to heat the house? If GFCH and you've got a temperature controlled thermostat set it to a sensible temp (19/20degrees) and make sure its in a room where the temp is stable (not by a door, next to a fire etc) that's what I always advice my tenants. Should do it at home but at this time of year I just light the fire. Rest of house still freezing though lol.

Debt neutral is as good as debt free mate. 

Thanks mate, having read pretty much all your diary I think you might be being a little harsh re the dad/husband thing, I believe as humans we make errors that we probably don’t intend and I can certainly vouch for that but I also believe that can be fixed and repaired with the right commitment to work at it. I haven’t always had this mindset but luckily a lot of soul searching worked wonders and I’m in such a better place but it’s been tough to admit my errors but certainly on the up.

re toys I’m the same although mine tends to be tech or trainers 😂😂 and whilst that hasn’t gone away I’m more conscious of buying and really do consider the purchases a lot more now than before and save rather than getting debt for it ( which I never thought I’d do)

Debt free is coming for sure but I’m not as stressed now I’m closer to it I feel more in control 

FootyFanDan

Well that four days off flew 😭😭back in on nights but hopefully not many more of these to do 

All direct debits have come out and allocated pots where needed, I think I need to assess how I am doing the pots as I think I’m trying to run before I can walk lol. Ideally yes I’d love all annuals sorted and car costs covered all prepared but this being my first try of trying to do this I think im being a little unrealistic at the minute trying to feedback all these pots so need to think how I do this. I have the funds in rainy day fund ready to clear my next debt in full so if I haven’t had a letter by end of week I am just going give them a call and make payment. Once this is done that will put me under the 2k mark 😀

Not really done much today as was sleeping I did manage to do a tiny bit of garden work and get some bramble trees trimmed.

I am looking at other areas to cut down on costs too as although things are comfortable at the moment I don’t wanna start racking up monthly costs for too many luxuries so I have cancelled the gym today as I haven’t used much since lockdown - 1 because still not keen on been places I don’t really need to be and secondary due Tovar’s my current hours the gym is just not a possibility so that’s 23.99 saved. Both Spotify and YNAB are under review both I do use a lot and ynab has been superb however I’m starting but to wonder if I can let this go now I’m more in control of finances so that’s staying for the moment but will see, the same with Spotify but I guess I could do with ads if needed so we will consider this as every bit helps even Irving we aren’t in a stage we have Tovar’s make drastic cuts

The last few months have really made me take stock of things and what I want from life and actually make me appreciate everything i do have but I also made want to enjoy things a and start enjoying the fun things a bit more so now it’s striking the balance. Overall I’m in better shape than I have been for a while both personally and professionally ( although admittedly this part continues to present its challenges)