The Four D's

FootyFanDan

Thank you DITR, I think it is just a case of deciding my priority and focusing on that. I admit I am struggling with that post debt freedom, which is weird to me. I guess with the debt I knew what I had to put the money to and the exact dates, where as savings requires more commitment and willpower.

FootyFanDan

Morning All - loving waking up and seeing the sunshine  . I have a long weekend which I am looking forward to. We do have a few things planned that will be wallet friendly but more just to try get out of the house and get some miles in the legs haha. Weekly shop was done yesterday - I really need to work on this more, it isn't really the money aspect but tend to find go in unprepared results in buying more (more to waste)! Also need to try and do some decluttering and sorting in the house which is how most of the weekend will go, and then footie on Sunday afternoon so will be a few drinks but won't affect budget as personal spends. 

Not sure what it is with the current property but we just seem to have not really fully went through everything, I think it is because we really never saw us living anywhere other than where we did for 7 years (the sucky part of renting). We just miss that place i think - which I get is pathetic! lol.  We really do need to do something though as it isn't feeling very homely here at the minute despite been in for 8 months.

To Do 

- Rejig budget to factor in new income
- Put some time in to goal setting
- Sort out the bedroom - really needs decluttering

I also need to do a few hours working from home on Monday, with the move to the new role its been all a bit hectic at minute so I have still a few bits I never got a chance to do on Thursday. 

Here is to as budget friendly weekends as possible. Hope everyone enjoys easter and the long weekend if you are lucky enough to have one

FootyFanDan

Wow, eventually getting back round to updating this diary, although I think a new one is needed. 

Since my last update things are going to be all change. I won't bore with the details, however family circumstances have changed and we are now back on the move. It wasn't expected or really planned but I think eventually it will work in our favour. We have been on council list for a while (after our old landlord decided to sell we wanted a backup). M daughter has particular medical needs that gives us a higher banding. Last week out of blue (but i think in part due to help from my dad's housing officer suggesting it be better we are closer) we were offered a property. This is going to massively change our budget for the good but we also are going to have a lot of change in terms of how my dad is going to rely on me more to provide a bit of care.

We have really dropped on quite lucky given housing situation, although in hindsight had i knwn the council offer was coming i. might well have not taken the current role I have. Work has been pretty crazy the last 6 months but defo felt the strain more in the last 3 months

So here is to the next step in the journey, I assume it is going to be a bit more budget friendly given we won't need bus travel for school anymore and the rent will be a lot less.

In less positive news I have managed to build up a bit of a balance on CC paying for a lot of stuff to assist with moving my dad back home. He needed all new white goods and was not in a position to help himself. 

I need to freshen up the budget - hope everyone is doing good....oh and where is the bloody summer!

DancingInTheRain

Hey Dan good to see you back.

Sounds like the last few months have been really full on, here's hoping the new house move brings a fresh, positive start for you all.

Oh and I totally hear you on the where's summer front! X

FootyFanDan

Thank you - I think it sounds like we have both had a few tough months - but its them that make us stronger right!

I am really looking forward to a fresh start and some real security, it wasn't expected but it feels right. I do really need to tighten back up my budgeting though, as last few month have been a lot more spendy than I would like.

FootyFanDan

so with the new move on the horizon I think there are going to be spends that are required but it is about been sensible for now with this. We already have a lot of furniture and white goods that are easily transported and in reasonable working order. We are going to do alot of the transporting of boxes ourselves but the big things will then need a man with van - so need to find budget for this.

We do have a few days out already planned for the summer already mostly paid and budgeted

We are due in London next weekend to watch Wicked - this has been a long time bucket list item but tickets have always been so expensive. I managed to pick some up on offer a few months back so a weekend in London is going to be fun for us all. This is pretty much paid just food and drink down there to consider. I am hoping weather dependent on taking the little one to the zoo as it is meant to be amazing.

The following weekend we are visiting family north of the border and hoping to take in a few scenic trips but we shall see. 

Anyone have any tips for good places for little one summer holidays shout up haha - although pretty sure she would sit glued to Ipad all summer if we let her.

Short Term To Do's

Save For Man with Van
Arrange with local council to collect a few scrap items
Process Broadband & TV Home Move
Set Up Re-direct
Arrange New Utilities

I am pretty sure going to be plenty to add - but we have 30 days and counting til we have to be out. We have keys for new place already so need to make sure we have funds in place to cover things there too.

mark55man

oh wow Dan a lot to process.  A bit of short term pain and fluctuations but you will be back on top of that in no time.  Also its funny how being closer to a relative sometimes means they are less needy as they know you are there so don't ask in advance as it were.  And although I have no idea if that is true with your Dad I imagine he is proud and grateful you are able to help him 

FootyFanDan

mark55man said:

oh wow Dan a lot to process.  A bit of short term pain and fluctuations but you will be back on top of that in no time.  Also its funny how being closer to a relative sometimes means they are less needy as they know you are there so don't ask in advance as it were.  And although I have no idea if that is true with your Dad I imagine he is proud and grateful you are able to help him 

Cheers Mark, I am hopeful that in the long term this choice will work out for the better.

Unfortunately the situation with dad was a lot worse than anyone thought and although mostly down to his own choices it doesn't make it any less crappy seeing him struggle, but onwards and upwards. Hope all is well your side

alt80

@FootyFanDan I’m sorry to hear about your Dad mate. I assume his struggles are alcohol related from the conversations we’ve had before. Honestly think it’s the worst addiction and the hardest to abstain from. AA could be worth a shot it’s life changing for some people although from personal experience it’s not for everyone based on my experiences of CA which is basically the same. Will say that some of the principles are very sound and I have tried to apply those tbf. Even if not for him, worth a shot and take what he can from it 100%.

Though it isn’t a walk in the park and will cost money, therapy is important imo. I’m still in therapy, it’s been mixed, you need to find the right set of pros for you iyswiacf but I do think it’s needed, ultimately drugs !!!!!! your brain up. Healthy lifestyle is really important. Lot of day to day effort tbf but fwiw I slip into old thought patterns and start white knuckling recovery when I stop really !!!!!! focusing on living heathily. Lot of people are similar.

What I’m trying to say is if he’s struggling, there’s more than AA out there if that doesn’t/ hasn’t worked for your dad - don’t give up. Also, get some support yourself. I can’t remember if your mum and dad are still married but therapy has been life changing for my wife and you should also have a support network mate. It’s !!!!!! horrible to realise as the one who struggles with addiction but it really does affect you all as a family. He should be able to turn to you but you should have support too.

I read a bedtime story to my son every night, sometimes he’s stubborn and decides he wants to read to me but if your dad is very close by and you/ your wife don’t mind sharing bedtime a few nights a week, let him read to your daughter. My parents are both well into their 70s now and a kickabout is too much but both love reading to my son at bedtime when we visit them. It’s !!!!!! beautiful to see, will give him a little focus too. 

Is the card balance a 0% purchase? If you’ve got a plan to get it paid off, using credit when required is not necessarily a bad thing. Just keep an eye on it, and stick with your plan.

The council housing is a massive opportunity for you to get that deposit saved up and get a home bought for you and your family. Don’t lose sight of the goal!

mark55man

that's a great post @alt80