Opening Pandora's box!!

Pandora_2

Well, here we go!!!
(Edit: This diary is mostly to keep me on track but any comments, ideas, hugs, telling offs, etc are always more than welcome!! )

The back story
When I was 19 or so, I thought it would be a great idea to get a credit card so I could start building up a good credit rating so that one day I would be able to get a decent mortgage. Started off well, buying a few things for my flat and making payments so that everything was cleared off before the 0% introductory rate ended. I then got a new credit card and did the same with the 0%, so still all good! Even after the rates ended I was still sensible and only used the cards when necessary and made sure things were paid off.
And then things changed. My partner lost his job and our income was halved. The credit cards (both in my name!) started to be used for food and bills rather than luxuries (or so I thought!) as we were really struggling. Turned out that my partner was using the cards online to buy computer games and all sorts of rubbish as he was 'bored being at home all day' :mad: This led to lots of arguments and an already slightly abusive relationship turned into a VERY abusive relationship
Fast forward another 6 months or so of him spending and spending and spending, and opening another credit card in my name!!!! Then my already suspicious best friend found out that he was abusing me and we made a plan for me to escape. By this time he had got himself a job at the bakery down the road so he wasn't home all day. One day, I pretended to go to work (I had to leave about an hour before he did) and once he had left I went back to the flat and started packing. We had plotted and planned and loads of people turned up to help me get as much of my stuff as possible. We had about 5 cars and although we managed to get a lot, there was nothing we could do about my furniture and there was still loads of stuff left behind. A friend from work had just had his flatmate move out and agreed I could go and live with him so at least I didn't have to come up with deposits and rent in advance or furniture but I had still lost a lot of my possessions, had no savings at all and was very depressed. This is when I started using the credit cards to cheer me up. At first I could justify it as I was replacing things I had lost but of course it didn't end there.
A few months went by and the tenancy agreement was coming to an end on the flat. My friend wanted his girlfriend and her kids to move in, and as it was only supposed to be a temporary place for me to live I started looking for a flat for myself. Found a lovely place, got a loan so I could pay the deposit and rent in advance etc and moved in. I was feeling so much better by this point and I was working 2 jobs so could afford to live and pay a decent amount off the cards and I wasn't worried about the loan as it had all gone on the flat. I started a college course (one evening a week) and everything was going swimmingly!
Then everything crashed down around me
I lost my part time job, my hours at my main job were cut, my ex had found me and was harassing me, and it all just got too much and I ended up having a nervous breakdown I had to leave my job and go on Incapacity Benefit and ended up signed off sick for over 2 years with clinical depression and anxiety. I was so bad at one point that my Mum had to come round morning and evening to wash, dress/undress and feed me as I just couldn't manage anything. Luckily, all my bills were on direct debits so I didn't have to think about them, but my income was a lot less than my outgoings so every month I was getting further and further into my overdraft. The bank eventually stopped it going any further and then bills started not getting paid. The interest and non-payment charges on the cards were getting higher and higher, I was getting threatening letters from my utilities, my phone and internet were cut off and I couldn't even afford to buy food. By this time, I had debts of nearly £25,000!!!!!!:eek:
I finally dragged myself up out of my depression enough to start leaving the house and dealing with things. I went to the CAB and they contacted all my creditors to get the cards frozen and the interest and charges stopped. They did this with my loan as well, and helped me come to payment arrangements with them and with my utilities. Luckily I wasn't in arrears with my rent or council tax thanks to my benefits so at least that was one less problem!! We arranged to pay off my utilities at £10 per month plus whatever my monthly bill was, and all my creditors agreed to token payments of £1 per month each. Even with this arrangement, I was still struggling so the CAB put me on their scheme for weekly food parcels so I could at least eat something!
Eventually I came off Incapacity and got myself a part time job. Things were looking up!! I was keeping to my payment plans so my debts were going down, not up, even if it was at a barely noticeable rate! I worked hard at getting myself sorted and started working full time again. I paid off all my utilities debts and could afford to live, albeit VERY frugally!! I increased my CC and loan payments to £5 a month each, and over the years I've continued to increase my monthly payments but only to as much as I could realistically afford
Loads of life stuff happened which isn't particularly relevant to the debt story apart from the fact that I upped and moved 100 miles away to finally go to uni at the age of 25. Obviously this affected the money situation, but as I was already an expert on budgeting and living cheaply things weren't really all that different. I kept up with my payments, and always seemed to have more money than my other student friends!! So much so that they all got me to help them draw up budgets and teach them things about how to live well but cheaply!! :rotfl:
Unfortunately the depression reared it's ugly head again and I ended up dropping out of uni. I stayed where I was though as I had a great support network of friends, was doing some volunteering and had a part time job which became full time when I left uni. Things went up and down with work as my depression went up and down, and there were times when I had to go on JSA, but always managed to get another job and even went back to my old job a few times - they were VERY understanding!!! Eventually, all my years of volunteering paid off and I got my dream job!!!!! It was only part time so I kept another part time job as well and everything was just fab!!
Unfortunately, there were cuts at my part time job so I lost that, and as my dream job was working for a charity, when the council had to make savings, most of our funding was cut and I was made redundant - 2 months before I would have been eligible for redundancy pay I was heartbroken but picked myself up again and thanks to my best friend got a job at Subway. A massive pay cut, the hours weren't great and it was really not something I wanted to be doing, but a job is a job and I refused to be unemployed by choice! By this time I had been getting Disability Living Allowance for a good few years and I could still get some housing and council tax benefits so things weren't too bad. And then my hours got cut from 20 a week to 6!!!!!!!! It was a 0 hour contract so I couldn't really complain, but it really wasn't enough to live on. I searched and searched for jobs but just didn't get anywhere.
This brings me up to about 6 months ago! With the lack of job prospects in Derby, I decided to move back home to Manchester. I had 3 months left on my tenancy agreement, so I started applying for jobs up here and looking for somewhere to live. For once, everything just fell into place!! I found myself a beautiful house and got a clerical job in a hospital The job is a 0 hour contract again, but there is that much to do that I can work as many hours as I want and it's flexible so if my depression or anything kicks in, then it's easy to change my hours to give me the time off I need. So in June this year, I made the big move!! Of course the depression set in as I had been in Derby for almost 7 years and all my friends were there, but I wasn't starting work straight away so I had time to get myself (and the house!!!) sorted.
My job is hard work but the girls in the office are lovely and I do get a sense of achievement from it, and although it's not what I want to do forever, it's perfect for now

Well!!!!! That was a super long post but now you have the 'basic' back story of me!! Was hard going over things again, but feels good at the same time, if you know what I mean?!
I've been waiting in for a delivery this morning which is why I've had time to write this, but it's just arrived so I best get myself to work for a few hours!

Thanks for reading and if you've made it this far then you deserve a medal!! More to come later if anyone is interested!!! :rotfl:

Whitefeather8

Hi Pandora,

I always loved the story of Pandora's box, being a very curious soul myself, who has got herself in to many scrapes.

What remained was hope which is a wonderful thing and your story is very inspiring. You are an incredible woman to have survived so many knocks.

Onwards and upwards x.

Pandora_2

Whitefeather8 wrote: »

Hi Pandora,
I always loved the story of Pandora's box, being a very curious soul myself, who has got herself in to many scrapes.
What remained was hope which is a wonderful thing and your story is very inspiring. You are an incredible woman to have survived so many knocks.
Onwards and upwards x.

Thanks Whitefeather, that means a lot

My apologies for the super depressing start to my diary, and I'm going to try to keep it as positive as possible, but if I'm 'opening the box' and laying my life bare for everyone to read, then there was no point in sugar coating the past. It happened, I'm dealing with it and I've learnt from it as well. No regrets anymore, as dwelling on how everything went wrong won't get me anywhere. Facing up to things, dealing with my debts and looking towards the future is my new plan

Whitefeather8

I did not find it depressing at all. It took a lot of courage to release all that pain.

You are starting a new chapter now, where everything that you have learned on this sometimes torturous journey called life starts to help you rather than hold you back. Your new plan sounds fab x.

Pandora_2

Aww, thanks again Whitefeather I've just found your diary so will subscribe and have a good read of it later on

Here's part 2 of my story -

The current situation
When I started my new job, we agreed that I would work 4 days a week (Mon, Tues, Thurs, Fri) as the medication that I'm on was having a severe sedative effect on me. I needed a minimum of 10 hours sleep a night (and ideally an afternoon nap as well!), I wasn't very alert/had a massive lack of concentration when I was awake and after 2 days of working I was absolutely exhausted. With a 2 hours commute each way, we also agreed on about 5 hours a day with wiggle room to do a bit more or less depending on how I was feeling. So I was working approx 20 hours a week for the first couple of months.

I've recently been to the doctors to discuss my medication and although it is doing what it's supposed to be doing with regards to my mental health, the sedative effect was just causing too many problems. We've now changed the way I take it without altering the dose and although it took a couple of weeks to notice a difference, I don't need an afternoon nap anymore and am more alert when I am awake. I still need my 10 hours a night but that is now enough so that I'm not totally exhausted everyday, just the 'normal' amount of tiredness you get after a day at work. So I'm slowly but surely upping my hours at work. I'm now working 3 hours on a Wednesday as well as my usual the rest of the week and the plan is to increase that to 5, and then hopefully increase every day by half an hour. I will give myself a few weeks to get used to each increase in hours and then increase it again. It's a good few years since I've worked full time but hopefully by taking it slowly I will be able to get there without even noticing it

Time to get ready for work, but I will be back this evening with an SOA and details of my old and new debts.
Hope anyone reading this has a lovely day

Whitefeather8

It is so refreshing to hear of a person being treated with compassion and dignity in a job, I so often hear the opposite.

It looks like they are reaping the benefits though as your health and well being improve.

Good luck on your debt free journey, it looks like you have already made great inroads clearing around a third!

Pandora_2

Yeah, I've been really lucky with my last few jobs as they've all been very understanding and let me change hours as needed. Years ago, I was constantly getting fired as I didn't tell anyone about my mental health problems and when I couldn't work, I just made up excuses until I eventually lost my job. Now, I'm totally honest straight away and it has worked wonders. Nobody has really had to make massive adjustments for me, but it's little things like being flexible with my hours, being allowed to have a little break if I'm feeling overwhelmed at work and being able to text my manager if I'm not feeling well rather than having to phone up as I sometimes struggle with contacting the 'outside world' once the depression gets hold and I retreat into myself. All little things, but have made a massive difference
Good luck with your journey as well Whitefeather! Spiders, hey?!?! :eek:

Whitefeather8

Yes, the spiders and I are now on speaking terms!!

It would be lovely to live in a world where bad things don't happen to good people and spiders were cute and cuddly, but in the absence of that I am going to make the most of life regardless!!

Have a great day x.

Pandora_2

Have finally worked out and written up my SOA so here it is, with a few explanations and a plan for moving forward.

Income
Wages - approx £650 every month (hours vary)
Disability Living Allowance - £411.40 every 4 weeks - works out at £445.68 per month
TOTAL - £1,079.23 *Going to try and increase my hours and have applied for Working Tax Credits so this will increase soon!

Outgoings (rounded up to nearest pound)
Rent - £450
Council Tax - £76 *Applying for Housing and Council Tax Benefits so hopefully these will decrease
Water - £23
Gas and Electric - £44
TV Licence - £13
TV/Phone/BB - £36
Mobile - £16
Debt payments - £120 *see below for details
Food/toiletries/cleaning/cat - £100 *Hoping to reduce by doing the Grocery Challenge each month
Clothes/shoes - £15 *Won't be spent every month but will be there when I need it
‘Fun’ - £100 *Naughty I know, but got to have some fun!!!
Birthdays/Holidays - £15 *Won't be spent every month but will be there when I need it
Cigarettes - £65 *The very worst thing I could be spending/wasting money on, however this is half what I was spending/smoking only 3 months ago so it's definitely better than it was. As I work on cutting down further and eventually quitting this will reduce and eventually disappear
TOTAL - £1073

Wow!!! Working it out like this shows that I will have £6 per month left over once I start sticking to my budgets!!! This will be a massive help in clearing off my debts!!! :j


Old Debts – Current balance and repayment amount
Halifax CC - £5,780.21 - £15 per month
Halifax Loan - £396.77 - £15 per month
Halifax Overdraft - £969.37 - £15 per month
More Than CC - £844.24 - £10 per month
Capital One CC - £1,410.47 - £10 per month
Total - £9,401.06 *Will increase payments as much as I can when I can

New Debts – Current balance and repayment amount
Housing Benefit overpayment - £60 - £20 per month *Last payment end of January
Tax Credits overpayment - £1,831.64 - £15 per month *Hoping this will be paid off out of my Tax Credits allowance for this year - once it has been decided
Student Loan overpayment - £818 - £10 per month
*Not including my 'proper' student loan. Overpayment caused by dropping out of uni part way through the year.
Natwest overdraft – approx £1,000 - charges of approx £10 per month*Moving house expenses and the gap between my last wages and first wages from new job meant I had to use my overdraft to survive. My wages and benefits do clear this every month, but then I'm back into it by a similar amount as the month goes by. Get a monthly charge and interest on this which doesn't help, but as my outgoings decrease and my income increases this will eventually clear off.
Total - £3,709.64 *I will increase the payments on these debts as and when I can
TOTAL DEBTS - £13,110.70



All my debts are free of interest and charges (apart from my current overdraft) and I'm aiming to be debt free by the time I'm 40. I'm 32 now and at my current rate of payment it would take approximately 10 years to pay them all off, as long as I 'snowball' my payments. Hopefully, the Tax Credits debt will be cleared off soon anyway, but I'm going to do everything I can to overpay on all the other debts as I need to shave off over 2 years to hit my target of being debt free by 40, and I would absolutely LOVE for it to happen sooner than that!!! :rotfl:

Pandora_2

The most important thing to get cleared off first is my current overdraft as it's the only thing with interest and charges. My wages and benefits get paid into that bank account and clear it off each month but as it only takes me a few quid into the black, I'm back into the overdraft again for most of the month.

So, although I need to use it each month at the moment, if I can reduce all my outgoings and increase my income, then hopefully I will be back in the black permanently I know I won't be able to make much of a dent in it over the next month or so with all the expenses of Christmas and New Years, but I will do what I can and start in earnest in January.

Here is what I have thought of so far that will help:

1 - End of a debt - saving £20 per month
I have 3 x £20 payments left before I will have cleared off my Housing Benefit Overpayment. I get paid around the 26th and this payment goes out around the 30th. The last payment will be at the end of January so starting from February's pay, there will be £20 a month less to pay out

2 -End of a debt - saving £15 per month
I have just put a claim in for Working Tax Credits, and the online calculation said I should get over £2grand for the rest of the tax year. I assume they will use this to clear my Overpayment and only pay me whatever is left, so I'm not expecting much of an increase to my income. However, it will mean I can stop the monthly payments of £15, and this can then stay in my bank account to reduce my overdraft

3 - Sale of mobile phone - £??
I just got an early upgrade on my mobile phone so I need to look into selling/recycling my old one. I know I would get more money for the new one, but my 'proper' camera has broken so I could really make use of the new phone as it has a better camera than my old one and would save me having to buy an actual camera to replace the broken one

4 - Sale of IPod - £??
I picked up a mini IPod in a charity shop about a year ago for £10, but haven't ever used it so I may as well sell it. Also, now I have a new mobile, I will be able to put music on it and use that if I ever do feel the need

Think that will do for now. Will add some more tomorrow :A

Pandora_2

Wow!!! I've just found an old list of my debts!! Can't believe the difference in the balances!!!! Has shown that with a bit more effort I should be able to clear my debts well before the time I'm 40!!!!! :j

Debts - 2009 - 2014

More Than CC - £1,699.24 - £844.24
Capital One CC - £2,296.47 - £1,410.47
Halifax CC - £6,641.71 - £5,780.21
Halifax Loan - £1,243.27 - £396.77
Halifax Overdraft - £1,822.37 - £969.37
Total - £13,703.06 - £9,410.06

In the past 5 years I've managed to pay off over £4,000 on these debts, cleared off some old utilities debts (had forgotten about those!!), cleared off the overdraft I had when I was a student (£1,600) and have been paying off my new debts as well. I also had £1,000 in savings to go towards moving house a few months ago!!

At least 1 year of the 5, my only income was my student loan and grant and any part time work I could get, and the other 4 years has been mostly part time work or JSA, so I'm actually really impressed with how much I've paid off and managed to save!!!!!

I'm guessing it equals about £8,000 over 5 years, so now I have more income, I should be able to not only match that but increase it and then it will be plain sailing after that!!!