I've had enough....

wannasavemoney

Why oh why does everyone think that a great big smackingly expensive engagement ring is going to make their commitment to each other any different? DH and I were brassic when we got engaged 18 years ago. We both made a great big thing of going into town, stepping into Argos Catalogue shop and spending a MASSIVE (not) £34.00 odd on my engagement ring. It did not in any respect change our feelings for each other, it just meant that we had just enough left over to go and have a celebratory drink TOGETHER. That is all that matters in my opinion. The said engagement ring gave up the ghost approx 2 years ago when the replacement, which was not that much more expensive, was purchased in its place. It realy does not matter about how much it costs its what it symbolises that matters. PS: the original is still in my jewellery box for sentimental reasons in a little plastic bag cos it literally fell to bits when i dropped it:eek:

liz105

I want to echo everyone on here plus

It costs nothing to get married these days...

well, ok, thats not quite true, you'll need about £150 for the church/registry office if its on a saturday, its a year since I got married I cant remember how much it was now!!!!!

as for engagement ring? who cares! men dont tend to wear one so it shouldnt matter that much for the woman. wear anything for the time being then save up for the big one, just like Snaggles said. Its what you have said to each other (i.e. lifelong commitment hellooooo how kewl is that :j ??!!) not the money!

wear a hoolahoop - then you can eat it if you get peckish/marooned on a desert island :EasterBun

D&DD

Hi Moley So sorry to see how down you are hun BUT I've just spotted your sig...You know you really are doing absolutely brilliantly :T You are very nearly halfway to clearing your debts which is in my book a fantastic achievement for one years work well done!!!!!!!!!
Keep on going I'm.... *ahem* a little older than you and still in debt so to acheive being debtfree at your age will be wonderful.You can then start married life afresh without such a millstone round your neck

thriftychick

http://www.weddingkingdom.com/wedding/ceremonytypes/civilservice4.html

Just a thought, you don't have to spend a fortune and you are just as "married"!

Molanole

wannasavemoney wrote: »

Why oh why does everyone think that a great big smackingly expensive engagement ring is going to make their commitment to each other any different? DH and I were brassic when we got engaged 18 years ago.

I don't, that's just the thing. He gave me a rolled up kitkat wrapper the other day, slightly too big to wear but what it symbolises is more important. OH just knows the sort of ring I would love and desperately wants to be the one to provide it for me. He too wants the dream but I've told him that Elizabeth Duke, cubic zirconia is more than ample if he wants to do it "properly".

wannasavemoney wrote: »

It realy does not matter about how much it costs its what it symbolises that matters.

I quite agree.

spud30

dawnybabes wrote: »

(((((hugs)))))

When my hubby proposed he gave me a piece of green hosepipe - perfect ring sized ! I still have this in a box 15 yrs on .....

And when mine proposed, I demanded diamonds, and havent worn the ring for around 10 years.

I also bought him got a diamond signet ring when we got engaged, that he has NEVER worn.

We've been together 17 years now, we are in debt up to our eyeballs, but we are still happy and working together to get out of debt.

The person is important hun, not the ring or the day. As long as you choose the right guy, the rest really is bye the bye.

nearlyrich

Hey you are allowed the odd rant from time to time, it's not easy getting debt free.

Your OH sounds lovely, he is sensitive to your situation and he wants to marry you.

Hope you feel more positive soon xx

tesuhoha

My goodness, we've been feeling much this way today. We earn a lot of money between us and have nothing to show for it. The house is a mess and its so frustrating not being able to do it up. It needs an extension and there's no point even putting a lick of paint anywhere so extensive is the amount of work it needs. However you are doing so well. Don't give up.

We got married in a register office. I had a gold band but no engagement ring. I wore a suit which wasnt new. I had no flowers and we went to the pub for lunch. We didnt have a honeymoon, any wedding guests or presents and didnt go out in the evening. We had 2 witnesses and that was it. My inlaws bought us a chopping board would you believe. However, 27 years later we are still together. We are not in a good position as we have made bad financial decisions but it hasnt affected our relationship. We have never had a lot of money. You just have to live your life as best you can and enjoy what you can and try not to wish time away because it goes fast enough anyway.

wannasavemoney

Molanole wrote: »

I don't, that's just the thing. He gave me a rolled up kitkat wrapper the other day, slightly too big to wear but what it symbolises is more important. OH just knows the sort of ring I would love and desperately wants to be the one to provide it for me. He too wants the dream but I've told him that Elizabeth Duke, cubic zirconia is more than ample if he wants to do it "properly".

We were not much better off when it came to our registry office wedding. Family and friends chipped in cos they knew our circumstances and it was a great day and it cost us nothing and at the end of the ceremony oh's dad put £50 note in oh pocket so we made fifty quid - how cool is that. Don't despair as long as he's the one go for it regardless.:D

lynsayjane

liz105 wrote: »

wear a hoolahoop - then you can eat it if you get peckish/marooned on a desert island :EasterBun

this is the greatest idea i've heard all day! :rotfl:

mol, keep your chin up my darling. Life is so much bigger than the balance of your bank account. You have a man who loves you so much he wants to spend the rest of his life with you. Thats the important part.