Top Table Dilemma!!

lmckerchar

Hi everyone,

We have fallen in love with our dream venue where the traditional top table is set on a podium.
However it only seats 8 and we have 9 in our bridal party. I'm having 2 bridesmaids one of whom is maid of honour.
Is it acceptable to only have the maid of honour at the top table and to seat my other bridesmaid with her family, plus one and the flower girl? Don't want to feel guilty on the day and personally I wouldn't mind if it was me but I'm worried she will be offended.
Any advice?

Thanks x

[Deleted User]

Why not defuse any possible problem by making the 'top table' bride, groom, parents only? Is there any way the venue can alter the seating pattern on the big table?

If not, why not just talk to your BMs about the issue? they might come up with or suggest a solution themselves

wifeforlife

I personally would be a tad offended, sorry. I would ask the venue is it adjustable, or have a different seating arrangement.

lmckerchar

Thanks,

We wanted to keep it as traditional as possible for speeches etc so ideally needed the best man at top table as well as family.

Venue has offered two round tables but it means that people have their back to the room whilst on the podium and therefore you can't really see main bridal party as they are on the other side of them. That would also mean having extra people on top tables which then causes offence to those "left behind" Argh....it's stressful

Will probably speak to venue again and ask if there is anyway we can squeeze 9 onto their standard table. Really don't want to offend anyone but at the same time don't want to be stressing over seating arrangements (they've already been a nightmare due to a very unconventional family!)

Also when we looked up the traditional seating arrangements for top table, there should only be the chief bridesmaid anyway which would be fine if I had a few more bridesmaids it's just with in only being one left that I feel awful!

Thanks for your advice x

bubbles0169

Im only having maid of honour at top table the rest are with their families

ennui

I wouldn't worry about it, as you said, it's usually only the best man and chief bridesmaid who are at the top table, and there are so many variations these days that anything goes. She might not even be expecting to be at the top table.

jenhug

It wouldn't bother me, it's only a table. to be honest I would prefer to be with my family and able to chat and enjoy rather than sit on the top table feeling awkward!

cherylim

Our top table will consist of the two of us, both of our mothers, our maid of honour and best man.

Our two bridesmaids, our ring-bearer and the ushers make up the rest of our 'most important guests', and will be seated at other tables.

Bride2be24

I only had my MOH - which was my sister on our top table and we sat our other bridesmaids together with the ushers on one table with their partners x

BabyBoots

I think it's fine to only have one bridesmaid/neither bridesmaid on the top table.

At my sister's wedding, the top table was bride, groom and their parents. I sat elsewhere with the other two bridesmaids.

At my own wedding this month, I will have one of my bridesmaids on the top table (making 8) and my other bridesmaid, my sister, seated elsewhere, with her husband. She is therefore sitting with the remainder of my very small family. I didn't make a big deal out of it with my BMs, and they certainly aren't complaining. It's probably equally a privilege and an "uh-oh, best behaviour then" feeling to be on the top table.

Other than parents, I think everyone else is ambivalent about being on the top table. If you really think one bridesmaid would be offended at not being on the top table, put them on the top table, if the other is more easy going.

sarah69696pink

I wouldn't mind at all - you wouldn't have all the ushers at the top table would you? In fact as a bridesmaid I wouldn't even expect to be at the top table.