Stag and hen do's

snowybutterfly

Do you think i'm being unreasanable. My OH is having a stag do which includes his male and female friends/family (i call it a Stag and friends do). I have now decided to have a Hen do with my family and friends (male and female). The problem is i say his mum needs to go to his Stag do as that's where his friends and family will be, he disagrees and says she needs to come to my Hen do (the only person she know's is me, and everyone else knows each other lots of in jokes etc).

wanchai_2

Not unreasonable at all imho!

johannalf88

If he is having his male and female friends and family I would be a bit put out if I was his Mum and wasn't invited!!
But do you want his mum at yours? If he is not having your Dad at his stag, I see no obligation or anything...

snowybutterfly

His dad and brother will be going to his Stag do so they will tell her about the mixed group.
I have my OH and his best woman both saying im unreasanable as he can't have his mum at a stag do, but i feel for his mum as she will instantly know that it's my family and friends at my party etc.
I feel if she came to mine i would have to keep making sure she's ok and sitting next to her as she is shy and so not being able to enjoy myself at my own Hen do.
P.s my dad will be coming to mine so i don't see why it's any different.

74jax

I would have thought the mums go on the hen and the dads on the stag do but that's just how I would do it.

snowybutterfly

hi 74jax that's what i thought but then when all his friends male and female were added to his list i decided that i would do the same for mine with just my own male and female friends but it appears i also have to have his mum, and my dad who also was not invited to OH's.

johannalf88

Say you will have his mum if he takes your Dad... :rotfl:

snowybutterfly

:-) im just fed up with it now. I just want to go out and have some fun, i work full time and im studying 2 60 point OU courses so not been out with my friends since October.

katie1812

Do what you want! Sounds simple but whatever is going to be easiest really.

However I would say that seeing as your families are going to come together that wouldn't it be nice for her to get to know people... She may be shy but I'm sure your friends would make her welcome. I'm inviting my mother in law to be, and my fiance's sisters because I want them to be involved, I think they would be put out if they weren't invited to be honest. Getting married is a joining of two people but also in our eyes a joining of two families. They won't see each other very often but at the end of the day, to me, they are my family too. I think you should consider how it may look if one went to one but not the other way round.

Idiophreak

I really can't imagine that either set of parents would be shocked if you said you didn't want them on the stags/hens...it's not unusual for them not to be involved, even these days.

If you don't want his mum at yours, don't invite her. If he doesn't want her at his, he doesn't have to invite her either. She'll get over it, I'm sure.

daisiegg

There will be no mums or dads at our stag or hen. Nor do they have any expectation of being invited! Why does EVERYBODY need to be included in EVERYTHING?