Help - I'm a mess :(

debtfreewannabe321

Hi and good luck with the quitting smoking I think if you cut out the budget for holidays, reduce food budget to £200 (we have one of £250 for 3 kids & 2 adults) and perhaps reduce the gift fund by half you will have money to throw at the debt. Shop in the sales for presents, or when the weather gets nicer boot sales & charity shops too. You can get gifts still in their packs/with tags on that people have thrown away! Check out the old style board some great recipes on there that you can bulk cook so eat one and put one in freezer for last week of month when everything is tight! I do this and generally don't spend hardly anything on my 4th shop of the month.

Good luck

Memory_Girl

Just checking on on you flis21 .......... and I see you are already off and rolling:j:j

You are now officially one day closer to being debt free :T

Baby steps each day and you will get there, we know, we are all just a little step further along the road than you.

Keep us posted

MG

mooomin

flis21 wrote: »

I've also just signed up to the nhs smoke free website and the giving up smoking thread on here. I've set my quit date for Saturday, will hopefully see quit smoking advisor at children's centre on Friday. I am actually almost excited about it now, thinking how much money this will save, as well as being better for me, my children and my business. Whilst I know it will be hard the benefits are so large that it seems stupid not to do it. Am going to write lists of the benefits and stick them up on my back door (I usually go out my back door to smoke) so that I see it whenever I'm in the kitchen reminding me why I'm doing this.

Top tips from an ex-smoker:

Throw out everything you would normally use the night before. Lighter/ashtray etc. Keep a stock of chewing gun and have some whenever you have a craving (My jaw ACHED by day three!) Have some chocolate/treats in the house for the first couple of days.

I transferred the money I would spend every day on fags into another account and used the money to pay for Christmas. This might not work for you as you have a debit in terms of income vs debts, but you could stick a fiver a week away to buy yourself something nice at the end of the month.

flis21 wrote: »

Just phoned BT and have downgraded my broadband (my ex had it on unlimited downloads and I don't really download much if anything), so that's another £10 a month saving. They are also going to refund the amount upfront I have paid for the unlimited broadband for the next 2 months, so that should help with the phone bill!

Remember that online streaming/games count as downloads for some providers so if you use iPlayer or similar services it could count towards your limit.

Well done for making so many changes

flis21

somethingcorporate wrote: »

What did you spend all that money on? Do you not have stuff lying around as a result that you can sell?

There was an old thread on "up your income" about weird things you can sell on ebay - see if you can find it and sell everything that isn't essential - no point in having cupboards full of tat that is collecting dust when it could be sold and thrown at your debt for the good of your family.

Good luck, you'll soon find out how addictive it can be and then there'll be no stopping you

Unfortunately some of the debt was my wedding and honeymoon, the rest was consolidating cards and loans for my husband who was a gambler. Each time he'd tell me that he'd sstopped gambling, I'd help sort out the mess he was in and try to pay some off, only to find out a few months later that he was at it again. Don't really have anything to show for it. There are a few things around the house I could sell, I'm starting to go round and clear out, but nothing that's really gonna bring me a large amount of money

I must admit I did feel a bit of a buzz sorting those bits out earlier and I haven't been near a shop or bought anything online today, so pleased with myself for not spending anything. I suppose this is going to get into every penny counts. Actually thinking about that I have 3 money boxes full of coppers in my bedroom, I could count them up and put them in my bank account, that might help!

Thanks for all the advice
Flis x

flis21

flying_fresian wrote: »

Top tips from an ex-smoker:

Throw out everything you would normally use the night before. Lighter/ashtray etc. Keep a stock of chewing gun and have some whenever you have a craving (My jaw ACHED by day three!) Have some chocolate/treats in the house for the first couple of days.

I transferred the money I would spend every day on fags into another account and used the money to pay for Christmas. This might not work for you as you have a debit in terms of income vs debts, but you could stick a fiver a week away to buy yourself something nice at the end of the month.




Remember that online streaming/games count as downloads for some providers so if you use iPlayer or similar services it could count towards your limit.

Well done for making so many changes

I don't really use iplayer, anything I wanna watch I usually sky plus! I checked my broadband usage and it was coming in at around 2mb a month and on the lowest option I'm allowed 10mb per month, so it should be fine.

Thanks for the tips about giving up, last time I used lots and lots of polos, so thought I'd buy a multipack of them in ready. My boys are at their Dads this weekend, so thought it would be a good time to tackle it when I have 2 days without them here to start me off.

I have found a few more bits I can sell, am going to try putting some of the bits on ebay tonight.

Thanks,
Flis x

somethingcorporate

flis21 wrote: »

Unfortunately some of the debt was my wedding and honeymoon, the rest was consolidating cards and loans for my husband who was a gambler. Each time he'd tell me that he'd sstopped gambling, I'd help sort out the mess he was in and try to pay some off, only to find out a few months later that he was at it again. Don't really have anything to show for it. There are a few things around the house I could sell, I'm starting to go round and clear out, but nothing that's really gonna bring me a large amount of money

I must admit I did feel a bit of a buzz sorting those bits out earlier and I haven't been near a shop or bought anything online today, so pleased with myself for not spending anything. I suppose this is going to get into every penny counts. Actually thinking about that I have 3 money boxes full of coppers in my bedroom, I could count them up and put them in my bank account, that might help!

Thanks for all the advice
Flis x

C'est la vie. Lots of reasons people have debts, at least you can understand why you have yours and what can be done about it.

I 110% agree with this second paragraph - it is these small and somewhat insignificant actions (a few pennies compared to many thousands of debt) that actually give you the mental toughness and inspiration to keep going. From small acorns grow mighty oaks and all that and every penny off your debt now will probably save you as much again in interest. Keep posting, that will be another part of your journey and will honestly help keep you motivated.

Good luck

flis21

Thanks something corporate. Everytime I come on here and see another message offering advice it is spurring me on. I'm the sort of person that can really get obsessed with something when I get into it!! Think I will be watching every penny, my poor boys will hardly get treats again!!! lol But hey they'll survive better with a less stressed Mum who's keeping them fed and a roof over their head.
Thanks, Flis x

mooomin

What happened to me is that I turned into a moneysaving ninja and cut everything back to the bone, then went nuts when I realised how long I would have to live that way

I'm (slightly) more balanced now!

too_much_debt

Good luck with your debt free journey.

Just wanted to say that when I was a child my mum used to smoke and when she stopped she started eating polos (and lots of them), my dad used to buy her the great big boxes with the individual packets in for her. She didn't find it too hard to give up smoking though so she was lucky but years down the line she had to wean herself off the polos.

thehappybutterfly

Is your ex helping to pay some of your debt? As some of it was for your wedding and honeymoon, surely he has a responsibility for half it? He was there wasn't he?

I think you're being too soft on him. However, I don't know his income so maybe he can only genuinely afford £150 a month. You said he is/was a gambler - I hope for all your sakes he's stopped.

Good luck with your money saving ventures. You've been given loads of money saving advice so I won't add to them but something to help deal with the stopping smoking - if you keep really busy through the day with free activities with the little ones, crafty bits, cookie making etc. you'll be so busy, you won't have time to smoke! Then you can award yourself with your kids' delicious cookies!

Good luck!