It's only debt! it's nothing serious!!

medman

Hi All DFW Citizens,

I have been reading these threads for some time and I find them inspirational. I've tried to make a few contributions when I have felt able or qualified. We were in a lot of debt a few years ago and we managed to claw our way out of it. We still live by the DFW principles to stay out of debt. I thought this story might interest you all, and perhaps put into perspective your own situation.

It's my eldest brother (best friend too) he's had numerous jobs all his life, he's now 52 and has never had a career as such, always in debt, likes a gamble, a drink, a smoke etc...

Anyway he got married, had a couple of kids and started a haulage business. The business failed, soon after his marriage did too and he found himself in a squalid council flat in Leeds. "Low life" neighbours leaving their rubbish in the stair well, knocking on his door at four in the morning to scrounge a fag etc. He started to develop mental health problems and was at his wits end.

He woke up one day and had a light bulb moment: He decided to take control of his life and started by stopping smoking! Day 5 he had ten pounds in his pocket which would normally have been blown on fags. So being the guy he is, he bought ten lucky dips on the Lottery. And yes you've guessed, he won! 5 numbers plus the bonus ball = £123,000. The previous week it had been half that! The first thing he did was start smoking again!! Well he could afford to now!

He bought a house, his girlfriend sold her house and moved in and they did it up and life was good. Until he was diagnosed with lung cancer and had 2/3 of his left lung removed. He started to recover from the surgery and about two years later they found secondaries in his lymphatic system and the prognosis now is not good he's had his Chemo and it's when now not if!

When I first got the news I drove up to see him and was in tears and he said "hey, there's people a lot worse off than me". "Yesterday I wasn't sure what the future held, today I don't need to worry about it" "Yesterday I didn't have a pension plan, today I don't need one!"

When it seems you are in your darkest hour there is always someone worse off than you, and when you think about it there is a huge number of them all around the world far far worse off than you and me.

Sorry to be so depressing, hope this inspires some of you and I hope it doesn't depress anyone.

Keep the faith

MM

cazziebo

What a sad story, but in many ways, you've just put things into perspective. Thanks for sharing, MM, you have inspired me.

Thinking about you and your brother in the weeks to come, although he sounds a very special and strong person.

Caz x

jumping_j11

My heartfelt sympathies to you and your brother.
Both my parents were smokers and both died of lung cancer when still quite young. Your brother sounds so much like my eldest son, who is 33 (I'm 19 years older). He left his wife 18 months ago, and since then has sunk deep into debt, smokes like a chimney and drinks too much. He still has a job, which he is very good at, but has come close to losing it due to drink - related problems. He has gone from living in his own 3 bed semi to a box room in a shared house.Every so often I bail him out by giving him a bit of money, but I don't attempt to pay his debts because he would just get into more debt. The thing is he is one of the nicest, kindest people you could meet. He says to me that as he will age much quicker due to his lifestyle,we will go into an old people's home together one day!
At least your brother has you and your support.
Best wishes to you and him.