i can't stop spending

sb44

I just thought of something that I used to do as a child in the 70's (ok, 60's as it was when I was about 8 or 9 :cool:).

You used to be able to buy tins of sweets called Black Imps. It was a tiny tin, perhaps the size of a Tuc cracker if that!

Anyway, whenever I had anything left over from my pocket money and I am talking pre decimalization here, I would put it in that little tin.

At the end of the following week the feeling that I had when I could shake that little tin, listen to the sound of the money and then put it away in a bigger box felt amazing.

If you break down what you have to spend on a daily basis and put it in a purse, the following day, if, hopefully you haven't spent all of the previous days allowance, you can put that away into a jar, tin etc.

Then, at the end of the week you can physically see what you have saved.

You can then picture what you could buy with that few pounds, be it a treat, a pot of paint, some plant pots to brighten up the garden or put away in a bs towards a day out somewhere.

[Deleted User]

Well done on taking that first step to freeing yourself from the chains of spending Its baby steps but everyone you try you will move forward to a new happier life for yourself and your OH.you have realised that you have a problem and thats half the battle now with all of our help you will beat it.
I have always been fairly frugal for most of my life (I am of a different generation to a lot of the ladies on here) but I too had got into the habit of shopping aimlessly and filling my cupboards with stuff that half the time I ended up binning.Then I decided one day to take myself in hand and the first thing was to list everything I had that was edible in my kitchen I was horrified at how much food I had got and hadn't thought about.I now rotae my stocks (a bit like a supermarket really) and although my fridge freezer is fairly full at the moment I am slowly working my way through it.Every food cupboard in my house has a list of whats in there pinned to the inside of the cupboards.My freezer also has a list stuck on the outside with a couple of magnets .By my kettle I have a small piece of cardboard (usually the back of an old Christmas card cut off ) on which I list the things I have run out of, and when I do go to the shops that is all I buy. 'If it aint on the list it doesn't get bought'.I also only use cash for my shopping I budget for £30.00 per week but rarely use it all and whats left over gets put into my family holiday fund religiously every Monday morning.I also save a pound a day in a small tin money box towards Christmas.This gets put away at the end of every month in an inaccesable building society accout (inaccessable in that its a bus ride away)Staying away from the shops is difficult at times but if I turn right instead of left outside my garden gate I walk to the park (taking a drink in a bottle with me of course) Turning left would mean walking to the shops .
Years ago I worked part-time in Boots at Bromley for a 10 week period running up to Christmas and I can see how easy it is to buy stuff when you are working with it all day I know I always seemd to spend my wages before I got them home on buying stuff from Boots because I got a discount and it was in front of me all the time so I can see how easy it is for you to be tempted.but well done on taking the first steps .In a years time you will look back and be amazed at how well you have done and what you can achieve.
You go girl we are all behind you
JackieO xx

culpepper

I think a hobby would be a good distraction from spending.
Often when you are absorbed in something ,you don't notice the time flying by and all those bored and tempting moments will disappear.

When you contact your OH at work to ask him to bring home more things, is it maybe more of a need to talk rather than to ask for forgotten shopping?
I know the feeling of family being far off as my DD is 600 miles away during term time,we solve it by arranging a skype session with the web cam and it is such a lovely feeling to both see and hear her each time,the same feeling I get from going on a visit . When she cant use the camera due to limited access, we use the chat facility instead.

I am sure you will manage to conquer your spending once you find a few strategies.

BitterAndTwisted

Lemmings: the only thing I would recommend that you do spend some money on right now is a little note-book.

In that note-book you can make a start on a full inventory of everything in your cupboards, fridge and freezer. Once you have a full picture of exactly what you have you could spend some time making recipe and meal-ideas to use up your stocks.

The other thing that the note-book is useful for is for writing down EVERY SINGLE PENNY that you spend for at least a month. just looking back at that could suggest ways that you could cut things out without feeling any pain whatsoever.

Have a browse on the cheap-family-recipes.org website for some fantastic recipe ideas. If it's possible to feed a family of four for £100 a month just think of how well just the two of you could eat. This could mean that you'll be doing some planning and batch-cooking with the time you're on your own rather than dreaming up ways to spend money on things you don't actually need.

Stick around on this forum for masses genuinely useful tips and encouragement. You will be debt-free one day. It sounds like you have the will to, all you need to do now is start putting it into practice.

If you need help with your budgeting pop over to the Debt-Free Wannabe part of the forum and check out the budget-planner.

Welcome aboard Old-Style! It's fun here so I hope you stick around.

LameWolf

Hi Lemmings,

I can't add a lot, you've been given some great advice, but I would like to put in my two penn'orth about meal planning; not going to tell you what to do, just going to describe what works for me.;)

I have an inventory of my food cupboard and freezer, on an Excel sheet, which I update every time we use or buy something.

I have another Excel sheet with the meal plan - I keep it planned a few days ahead, but put it in red, which means it can be changed, if, for instance, I'm not feeling well (I have lupus), or something has cropped up. Once it's definite, I change it to blue. It's not actually as complicated as reading that back seems! lol

So a week for us could look like this:
Sunday: Omelette With Everything In - Mr LW cooking
Monday: Pizza
Tuesday: Shepherd Spy - Mr LW on early shift
Wednesday: Shepherd Spy leftovers - Mr LW on late shift so we need to be able to just nuke'n'eat when he gets home
Thursday: Mushroom risotto
Friday: Nut loaf, mash and peas
Saturday: Quorn fillets in white wine sauce with chips

Using this system, if I feel very rough on the Monday, I can swap doing pizza (labour intensive as I make my own dough) with the mushroom risotto (one pan and I can do it blindfold).

I like NSDs as well - how about keeping a count of how many you manage each month, as incentive to do loads of them?

Finally, if you're really bored, I can recommend the Old Style Daily Thread as something to cure boredom.;) Come and join us there!:o

Oh, and good luck - you can get on top of the situation.:o

babyshoes

Lemmings, well done for taking that first step.

You have had LOADS of good advice here, and there is lots more on these forums.

What I want to say is don't try to do all of it all at once! You will just get frustrated, start feeling deprived and give in. Try a few things that you think will work for you (as you are doing with your packed lunch and no spend day). If after a week or two they are working, then great, carry on. If not, then don't feel guilty, just stop and try something else. People are all different, and what works for one will just seem silly to someone else. Find what works, and stick with it. Once you have one or two things working, then come back and try a few more things. Baby steps!

You will get there eventually! Just don't get disheartened and stop alltogether if you slip up occasionally - you are human after all! Just pick yourself up and start again.

auntymabel

Just a couple of thoughts to add to the excellent advice others have given. I found it hard at first and felt deprived but came to a point when I got as much satisfaction out of not buying something as I used to from buying something. Also, there are OS meets arranged every now and then. If there was one near enough for you to get to you could make some new friends. Best of luck!

oldtractor

Hi lemmings,just checking in to see how you are doing. Its a lovely sunny day here where i live so out for a walk in a moment,to admire the trees and spring flowers. I'm on a weight loss diet ,lost 5lb so far,so need to keep doing stuff to stop me reaching for the biscuit tin. Yes its hard ,but worth it. Have a good day. What did you decide on your menu for today BTW? I think its a good idea to do another menu for tomorrow,hunt through the freezer/fridge/cupboards and drw up a list. What I do is keep the lists[menus] then after a given period of time,eg week or month,whatever suits you,i start again at list one,so its dead easy,no need to think about what to buy,its all there written down,so I make up my shopping list [ i only do the supermarket,which is Aldi,once a month] and off i go to get provisions. I also enjoy growing salad leaves and stuff and gathering blackberries etc. saves a packet and helps satisfy the need to aquire things.

lemmings1986

hi yes it has been quite nice here today too,good luck on the weight loss (oldtractor) it is hard i myself lost two stone on sw diet over 10 weeks and no how difficult it is i was going to bodycombat and gym but it got too expensive so now i have roped my oh to walking along the beach when its nice and were both off together as we live about a minute away well i went to work this morning to do our charity thing,we was having a cake stall which the staff had made and a raffle at the front of the shop to raise money for alzheimers (sorry for spelling)when my mother in law popped in to get some shopping she asked if i had bought a ticket for the raffle so i said no so she bought two tickets and gave me one,a hour later the raffle was drawn by a customer and i won i couldnt believe it it was for a hamper full of fruit and veg bowt £30.00 pounds worth i rang her up and told her the ticket she bought me had won and she said i could keep it there is far too much for us so i said i would share it with her although my cupboards are full i didnt have any fruit or vegetables in -fruit and veg is so expensive so we dnt buy loads we just normally just get apples,tangerines,bananas cheap fruit but this fruit hamper has got everything in fruit and veg we dont normally buy as its too expensive with the stuff in it i can make a stirfry have enough veg for a couple of dinners and enough fruit to take to work and maybe make sum puds to go in freezer-not sure if i can freeze them and not sure what puds i can make with them but will have a look on here and see if i can find sum plus will keep me busy i think this will last us until at least next week so thats something else i dont have to buy,and yes i havnt bought anything today my 1st ever no spend day yay me i have been that busy i havnt even thought about buying anything and am feeling really possitive sorry if this sounds like im gloating but i am soo proud of my self will try for another no spend day tommorow

LameWolf

Well done Lemmings, and congratulations on your win!:T
I thought you might find this website useful, re using and storing fruit'n'veg.:o
http://www.vegbox-recipes.co.uk/recipes/recipes-index.php