i can't stop spending

Derivative

If you're anything like me making your own wins out simply because you can eat more.

It'll do me in when my belly catches up with me, but 6 slices with leftover chicken and a bit of fruit for less than a quid beats a piddly meal deal any day.

lemmings1986

thanks everyone for your great ideas and support will let you know how i get on on my no spend day tommorow am feeling possitive and ive decided im only at work for a few hours doing a charity thing so going to take drink,sandwich and a snack just incase

sb44

Lemmings, you need something to take your mind of it when it is your day off.

Do you have a garden (I know that sounds daft but some people may live in flats etc).

Now that the weather is getting better, have a go at growing your own veg etc in pots in the garden.

I mean tomatoes, lettuce, peas rather than onions and cabbages.

You will be amazed how getting out in the sunshine and tending to your garden takes your mind off spending, it does with me anyway!

You don't need to spend lots on seeds if you are interested, put in a nice request on the gardening forum for any spare seeds, I am sure you will get some.

lemmings1986

sb44 wrote: »

Lemmings, you need something to take your mind of it when it is your day off.

Do you have a garden (I know that sounds daft but some people may live in flats etc).

Now that the weather is getting better, have a go at growing your own veg etc in pots in the garden.

I mean tomatoes, lettuce, peas rather than onions and cabbages.

You will be amazed how getting out in the sunshine and tending to your garden takes your mind off spending, it does with me anyway!

You don't need to spend lots on seeds if you are interested, put in a nice request on the gardening forum for any spare seeds, I am sure you will get some.

i havnt gt a big garden as i have three extensions anyway i could grow some in pots or hanging baskets that what i did last year and it worked also i think one of the papers are giving away free seeds will find out tommorow

sb44

lemmings1986 wrote: »

i havnt gt a big garden as i have three extensions anyway i could grow some in pots or hanging baskets that what i did last year and it worked also i think one of the papers are giving away free seeds will find out tommorow

There are lots you can grow in your hanging baskets, lettuce, rocket, small tomatoes etc.

Take a look at this forum for some ideas, they are a friendly bunch on there and will help with any gardening questions etc.

http://www.growfruitandveg.co.uk/grapevine/forum.php

sam.4000

Forget the past and start at the beginning.
I have changed shopping habits this year and it is hard but can be very rewarding. I was spending stupidly each month and was always in my overdraft at the end of every month. I went cold turkey in Jan and Feb and banned myself from supermarkets saving myself hundreds of £'s. Now I only allow myself in Aldi or Lidl as they have alot less in them so reducing temptation. I also write a list before I go shopping and do not buy anything unless it is on the list. I have looked at what I have got and made do and only bought something if I have actually neede it not because I wanted it. It is hard but this will be first month that I will have money left over by payday.

Ideas
:jSit down and look at what you have going in and out monthly and budget (with OH) There is a budgeting tool on this site, I made my own up in excel but it will start to get you to identify where your money is going.
:jLook at previous bank statement and see where your money has gone ( it is horrible but it does make you realise what and where your money goes).
:jUse internet banking to track your money outgoing throughout the month. Don't think I won't look because I won't like it, close one eye if you have too but it can help. Trust me I now go on a few times a week and it makes you more aware of where your money is going.
:jSet yourself and OH a weekly budget and use cash and leave the cards at home. It is much easier to see money and you can see it vanishing rather than plastic. If you don't have it you can't spend it.
:jGrow things in your garden, I know you say you have limited space but you it is amazing what you can achieve. Start with salad leaves this can save you a fortune than buying them in supermarkets. Helpful sites for inspiration are: http://www.verticalveg.org.uk/ and http://www.container-gardening-for-food.com/ ( I found first link from this site so thank you original poster)
:jFind thing to do - go for a walk, find cheap or free days out but keep yourself busy. You sound lonely so is there anyone locally that you can go and do things with? Are there any local groups that you can join.

:jSell things on ebay that you are never going to use or plan to do a car boot.

I know it is overwhelming but you do have the power to change your future. You are young so don't beat yourself up about it but be positive. Only you can change your future the past you can't change so forget it and move on. Good luck.

SWALLOW

Hi
Sam.4000 has come up with some great ideas.
I think the three things that have helped me take stock of my spending has been
a) Keeping a log of my daily spending (it can be a sobering thing to sit and add up the cash you spend on silly things)
b) Sold loads of items I was never going to wear or use on Ebay
c) Set myself a weekly budget for personal spending and housekeeping.

Good luck !

S

GreyQueen

Hello lemmings1986 and congratulations on taking the first step towards sorting out your spending problem. It's a step which a lot of people never manage to make and you're to be admired to have got to this point and need every encouragement IMO.

When I started reading your thread a few minutes ago, I was thinking that behind every overspending situation that I have personally known has been an unhappiness which is the trigger for normal levels of consumption becoming problematic. You mentioned that you have miscarried and please accept my condolences for your loss. To want to be a mum and have lost your baby is a very hard thing to endure. Please be kind to yourself.

You also have a working pattern which puts you in the heart of retail and an OH whose hours clash with your own, putting you in a stressful situation.

There has been some excellent advice up here already but my top tip would be to "keep your numbers" and write down absolutely everything you spend. I do mean everything, every penny. Do it for at least a couple of months, and then go back and see where your money went. If you do this honestly and consistantly, you'll begin to see patterns in your behaviour. Do you shop for X item at Y time on Z day because you've done/ felt/ been.......?

Once you've worked out what you're doing and gained some insight into why, you'll be in a position to change your behaviour towards something which is more helpful to your situation.

Keep your spirits up, lass, and the best of luck.

lemmings1986

GreyQueen wrote: »

Hello lemmings1986 and congratulations on taking the first step towards sorting out your spending problem. It's a step which a lot of people never manage to make and you're to be admired to have got to this point and need every encouragement IMO.

When I started reading your thread a few minutes ago, I was thinking that behind every overspending situation that I have personally known has been an unhappiness which is the trigger for normal levels of consumption becoming problematic. You mentioned that you have miscarried and please accept my condolences for your loss. To want to be a mum and have lost your baby is a very hard thing to endure. Please be kind to yourself.

You also have a working pattern which puts you in the heart of retail and an OH whose hours clash with your own, putting you in a stressful situation.

There has been some excellent advice up here already but my top tip would be to "keep your numbers" and write down absolutely everything you spend. I do mean everything, every penny. Do it for at least a couple of months, and then go back and see where your money went. If you do this honestly and consistantly, you'll begin to see patterns in your behaviour. Do you shop for X item at Y time on Z day because you've done/ felt/ been.......?

Once you've worked out what you're doing and gained some insight into why, you'll be in a position to change your behaviour towards something which is more helpful to your situation.

Keep your spirits up, lass, and the best of luck.

thankyou i am new to msn and loads of you have been so helpful with ideas etc i am feeling more possitive and am looking forward to the challenge i have just made a sandwich n drink for work and am leaving all money,bank card at home and attempting my 1st no spend day today will be back tonight to say how ive got on i gave oh my cards last night and told him not to give me then and ignore my requests if i ring and ask him to buy me stuff from work and hes quite ruthless sp thats it will probably never see my bankcard,cards again but if it stops me spending i'll try itand am goin to right down everything in my cupboards freezer etc and maybe do some baking when i come back i have everything i need in the cupboard so i dont need to buy anything and im sure it will keep me busy plus i am loving mse and all the threads on here thanks you all:beer:

Bitsy_Beans

lemmings1986 wrote: »

thankyou i am new to msn and loads of you have been so helpful with ideas etc i am feeling more possitive and am looking forward to the challenge i have just made a sandwich n drink for work and am leaving all money,bank card at home and attempting my 1st no spend day today will be back tonight to say how ive got on i gave oh my cards last night and told him not to give me then and ignore my requests if i ring and ask him to buy me stuff from work and hes quite ruthless sp thats it will probably never see my bankcard,cards again but if it stops me spending i'll try itand am goin to right down everything in my cupboards freezer etc and maybe do some baking when i come back i have everything i need in the cupboard so i dont need to buy anything and im sure it will keep me busy plus i am loving mse and all the threads on here thanks you all:beer:

Well done on your first step
Enjoy your first NSD :T